So excited to see my husband (70 hours and counting) :)
So hard to say good-bye to my out of town siblings and their families last night :(
Looking forward to reuniting my daughter with her daddy and some of her favorite family members :)
Dreading the last good-byes to the rest of my family, especially knowing that Katya won't understand the permanency of these good-byes :(
There have been so many, what shall I call them?, mental conflicts?
Watching one of those remodeling shows and realizing that the amount of money they spent on the dining room would be enough for us to live on for almost 3 years.
Watching the way some people here use water (turning on the water before even putting the toothpaste on the brush...), knowing my husband barely had enough water to bathe, do laundry, etc.
Watching what people here consider to be 'in need' or on a tight budget, knowing the abundance they actually have in comparison with my situation or that of many I know.
Watching what some girls are comfortable wearing here these days, even to church, coming from a culture of knee length or longer.
Enjoying the comforts and comfort foods of home, yet simultaneously feeling a little out of place and looking forward to the simplicity and honestly healthier lifestyle of home.
Struggling with faith, knowing that it "is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen", and seeing the needs and unknowns of our life. (For example, we've been gifted with more than half of what we need for the birth in a private hospital - hooray! But of course, that means that a little less than half is still needed....My husband has a job, but 100% commissions do not add up to what we need, and no other job has opened up...)
Sorry to say that I am too tired to come up with a good ending to this, but at least I managed to get one more post in before I go, and included at least most of what has been rattling around in my brain of late...
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Feeling a little rusty
The thing about blogging is that if you are blogging consistently, you almost start to see all of life through the lens of the possible blog post. There are an endless supply of posts. But when you are NOT blogging consistently, it gets harder and harder to put together a good post. With such limited internet access the last year or so, I am definitely feeling rusty. But I can't let a whole month of unlimited internet access go by without posting at all, so here goes...
THE VISIT:
I am a pretty social person. But having relationships of varying degrees in more than one place, with the distance factor complicating things, causes me to literally want to avoid acquaintances. I just don't have the energy for them. I have a limited amount of time to see family and close friends, and that is emotionally draining (not to mention the emotional energy involved in missing my husband and everyone else back home). In large group settings I find myself cringing when I see certain people coming, or just sort of shutting down because I can't figure out who is important enough to invest in. It feels almost like a personality change. Then there are the people who I want to see but somehow we don't seem to connect - I can't always tell if I am just not enough of a priority for them, or...?
And speaking of back home, I have to just comment that it is so strange how your parents house is forever home (at least if they still live in your hometown). I had never even seen this house before this visit, but both in my own mind and in that of many others (strangers and friends alike), I was headed home. But of course, at the same time, Saltillo, my husband, etc...that is home.
And I am missing home. Big time. My husband and I were both of the feeling, when we talked yesterday, that a month may just be too long for solo visits. This has been a bit hard on both of us, and definitely harder on him than he expected. He had encouraged me to take advantage of the opportunity to come up; 4 weeks was his idea. But he is finding that he feels awfully lonely, that he now has double the missing to do (last time I came up alone, I was pregnant with Katya...he didn't miss her yet. Now he misses both of us), that hanging out with his family just isn't the same anymore after 2 1/2 years of living with our little family. And although I am enjoying seeing everyone up here, I miss my husband big time. And although I of course have lots of help from my family with Katya, I am finding it very draining to be the only one responsible for her ... the one to make all discipline decisions, always deal with all nap/bedtime fights, etc.
I must be a bit tired, or missing home right now, because so far this post sounds a bit depressing or negative. I AM truly enjoying all the time with my family, spending time with friends that I miss, seeing people at church, seeing all the GREEN here (Saltillo is pretty much a desert), going up to the lake, etc.
Speaking of the lake, I have to share that Katya just loved it! In Saltillo, a large puddle after a big thunderstorm is about as much water as we ever see, so Katya just kept looking around and saying every 15 seconds, "aqua!". Then she'd tell Gramma, then Papa, then an uncle..."aqua". Topped off with all the passing boats, ducks, and swans, and all and all it was a very exciting experience.
Katya has done great adjusting to being here. Within an hour of arriving, she was checking out the house on her own, interacting with everyone. To varying degrees and on different timelines, she has given everyone in the house names that she can say, let them carry her, etc. She even warms up pretty quickly to each new friend we visit. She's been learning new words almost everyday, most of them in English (strangely, since arriving here she learned 'hola' and 'bien').
I put that label of 'the visit' up there because I have at least one other topic I was going to hit as well, but I am thinking this post has gotten long enough and I will save that for another post in the next couple of days.
THE VISIT:
I am a pretty social person. But having relationships of varying degrees in more than one place, with the distance factor complicating things, causes me to literally want to avoid acquaintances. I just don't have the energy for them. I have a limited amount of time to see family and close friends, and that is emotionally draining (not to mention the emotional energy involved in missing my husband and everyone else back home). In large group settings I find myself cringing when I see certain people coming, or just sort of shutting down because I can't figure out who is important enough to invest in. It feels almost like a personality change. Then there are the people who I want to see but somehow we don't seem to connect - I can't always tell if I am just not enough of a priority for them, or...?
And speaking of back home, I have to just comment that it is so strange how your parents house is forever home (at least if they still live in your hometown). I had never even seen this house before this visit, but both in my own mind and in that of many others (strangers and friends alike), I was headed home. But of course, at the same time, Saltillo, my husband, etc...that is home.
And I am missing home. Big time. My husband and I were both of the feeling, when we talked yesterday, that a month may just be too long for solo visits. This has been a bit hard on both of us, and definitely harder on him than he expected. He had encouraged me to take advantage of the opportunity to come up; 4 weeks was his idea. But he is finding that he feels awfully lonely, that he now has double the missing to do (last time I came up alone, I was pregnant with Katya...he didn't miss her yet. Now he misses both of us), that hanging out with his family just isn't the same anymore after 2 1/2 years of living with our little family. And although I am enjoying seeing everyone up here, I miss my husband big time. And although I of course have lots of help from my family with Katya, I am finding it very draining to be the only one responsible for her ... the one to make all discipline decisions, always deal with all nap/bedtime fights, etc.
I must be a bit tired, or missing home right now, because so far this post sounds a bit depressing or negative. I AM truly enjoying all the time with my family, spending time with friends that I miss, seeing people at church, seeing all the GREEN here (Saltillo is pretty much a desert), going up to the lake, etc.
Speaking of the lake, I have to share that Katya just loved it! In Saltillo, a large puddle after a big thunderstorm is about as much water as we ever see, so Katya just kept looking around and saying every 15 seconds, "aqua!". Then she'd tell Gramma, then Papa, then an uncle..."aqua". Topped off with all the passing boats, ducks, and swans, and all and all it was a very exciting experience.
Katya has done great adjusting to being here. Within an hour of arriving, she was checking out the house on her own, interacting with everyone. To varying degrees and on different timelines, she has given everyone in the house names that she can say, let them carry her, etc. She even warms up pretty quickly to each new friend we visit. She's been learning new words almost everyday, most of them in English (strangely, since arriving here she learned 'hola' and 'bien').
I put that label of 'the visit' up there because I have at least one other topic I was going to hit as well, but I am thinking this post has gotten long enough and I will save that for another post in the next couple of days.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Wow, it´s been a LONG TIME
I am going to write as much as I can and post as many pictures as I can before Herme and Katya can´t handle waiting for me any more... pictures taken since around early August till the present, and include first birthday celebrations :) (They are in reverse order, and my husband wants it clarified that his pants are only dirty because he had just sat down on a dusty bench....)
Let´s see, where do I start??
Well, still no job. My poor husband has applied for things ´beneath him´, for things recommened by friends, anything within his ability....and no one even wants to interview him (beyond an initial screening anyways), much less hire him. We don´t know what to think. He just keeps looking, keeps applying. The whole state of the economy doesn´t help any - there just aren`t a lot of jobs out there, and there are so many people looking for work.
My parents came to visit for a weekend, just in time to celebrate Katya´s 1st birthday. That was awesome, especially since Mom coming was a complete surprise to me! It was quick, part of a business trip, but we enjoyed every minute of it :) So special to have them here for the birthday party and everything.
Living so far, far enough to make travel expensive and therefore not common, was not a part of how I saw my life, and yet here I am. I am happy here, wouldn´t trade my husband or how this has all come together for anyting, but it is really hard to be so hard from family and friends sometimes. Speaking of which, this lack of internet time has started to wear on me...I feel really out of touch with all my U.S. folks. Sometimes I feel like you all have moved on with your lives without me, if you know what I mean. I know it isn´t really the case, but with communication a little harder of late, thats how it feels. Oh how I´d love to be able to use skype in my house and talk to you all whenever the mood strikes!
What else? CAn´t believe that my baby girl is already a toddler! What a fun age, learning something new everyday, showing off for us. Of course, there´s the tantrums and tired breakdowns and vomiting 9x between the hours of 1:30am and 8am, but it´s all worth it of course :) She started walking at 9 months, got scared by a fall, and didn´t find her confidence to walk alone until 11 months. But then she just took off running! She is always on the move, or at least it often feels like that. She loves to read, together or alone. She loves animals, no fear, says ´ruff!´ every time she hears a dog bark. She´s generally a very happy, smiley, friendly girl, although she is a bit discriminating in who she wants to be friends with, gie kisses to, etc. She knows where her nose is (or mine, or yours), she can tell you she is ´so big!´, she loves it when you applaud her. She likes to play peek-a-boo, palms facing out, elbows sticking out to the sides. She waves to the moon every single time she sees it, even if that means 5 times in 6 minutes :P
Ok, I think my time is up. So good to connect with you all :) I love and miss every one, and will try to figure out how to get online more often.
Let´s see, where do I start??
Well, still no job. My poor husband has applied for things ´beneath him´, for things recommened by friends, anything within his ability....and no one even wants to interview him (beyond an initial screening anyways), much less hire him. We don´t know what to think. He just keeps looking, keeps applying. The whole state of the economy doesn´t help any - there just aren`t a lot of jobs out there, and there are so many people looking for work.
My parents came to visit for a weekend, just in time to celebrate Katya´s 1st birthday. That was awesome, especially since Mom coming was a complete surprise to me! It was quick, part of a business trip, but we enjoyed every minute of it :) So special to have them here for the birthday party and everything.
Living so far, far enough to make travel expensive and therefore not common, was not a part of how I saw my life, and yet here I am. I am happy here, wouldn´t trade my husband or how this has all come together for anyting, but it is really hard to be so hard from family and friends sometimes. Speaking of which, this lack of internet time has started to wear on me...I feel really out of touch with all my U.S. folks. Sometimes I feel like you all have moved on with your lives without me, if you know what I mean. I know it isn´t really the case, but with communication a little harder of late, thats how it feels. Oh how I´d love to be able to use skype in my house and talk to you all whenever the mood strikes!
What else? CAn´t believe that my baby girl is already a toddler! What a fun age, learning something new everyday, showing off for us. Of course, there´s the tantrums and tired breakdowns and vomiting 9x between the hours of 1:30am and 8am, but it´s all worth it of course :) She started walking at 9 months, got scared by a fall, and didn´t find her confidence to walk alone until 11 months. But then she just took off running! She is always on the move, or at least it often feels like that. She loves to read, together or alone. She loves animals, no fear, says ´ruff!´ every time she hears a dog bark. She´s generally a very happy, smiley, friendly girl, although she is a bit discriminating in who she wants to be friends with, gie kisses to, etc. She knows where her nose is (or mine, or yours), she can tell you she is ´so big!´, she loves it when you applaud her. She likes to play peek-a-boo, palms facing out, elbows sticking out to the sides. She waves to the moon every single time she sees it, even if that means 5 times in 6 minutes :P
Ok, I think my time is up. So good to connect with you all :) I love and miss every one, and will try to figure out how to get online more often.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Final moments
Strangely enough, the final moments of our trip.... are a day longer and later than planned. We worked hard to get every last gift and hand-me-down squeezed into the suitcases, made sandwiches to get us thru a long day, got up really early to head for the airport...
and found out that the last leg of our trip doesn't exist today!!
It was the Lord's grace that we found out here and not in Houston - can you imagine if we had made it to Houston, and then they told us? With the baby, and not packed in a way to facilitate such a stop, and without a way to call the family in Saltillo and warn them?!?! It was thanks to the lady who checked us in and my dad that we did find out - the 1st two legs of the trip were a different airline than the last leg, so we had the boarding passes to get started. I was inclined to use our 2.5 hr layover in Houston to worry about the last boarding passes, but the woman behind the counter and my dad both encouraged me that there was time to do it before heading thru security.
So, here we are, one more day. Weird, huh? Good thing we don't have anything pressing awaiting us.
But after a week or so of really not feeling up to leaving and not wanting to leave my family, when it came down to good-byes last night and this morning I was feeling pretty good. The Lord's grace was very apparent in the final moments, and I was ready. (I assume that will be true for the good-byes the 2nd time around too!) :)
We appreciate prayers for the trip home (calm baby, no weather issues despite the forecasted snowstorm), as well as Herme's job search when we get back. Also, we are going to look for a house on the other side of town, closer to my in-laws, church, pastor....and now my closest friend in Saltillo moved to that side of town too.
and found out that the last leg of our trip doesn't exist today!!
It was the Lord's grace that we found out here and not in Houston - can you imagine if we had made it to Houston, and then they told us? With the baby, and not packed in a way to facilitate such a stop, and without a way to call the family in Saltillo and warn them?!?! It was thanks to the lady who checked us in and my dad that we did find out - the 1st two legs of the trip were a different airline than the last leg, so we had the boarding passes to get started. I was inclined to use our 2.5 hr layover in Houston to worry about the last boarding passes, but the woman behind the counter and my dad both encouraged me that there was time to do it before heading thru security.
So, here we are, one more day. Weird, huh? Good thing we don't have anything pressing awaiting us.
But after a week or so of really not feeling up to leaving and not wanting to leave my family, when it came down to good-byes last night and this morning I was feeling pretty good. The Lord's grace was very apparent in the final moments, and I was ready. (I assume that will be true for the good-byes the 2nd time around too!) :)
We appreciate prayers for the trip home (calm baby, no weather issues despite the forecasted snowstorm), as well as Herme's job search when we get back. Also, we are going to look for a house on the other side of town, closer to my in-laws, church, pastor....and now my closest friend in Saltillo moved to that side of town too.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Time to go
Katya is getting fussy quickly, but I'm gonna go ahead and try to write this post as fast as I can because I may not get another chance.
We leave early Tuesday morning, and I am not too sure how I feel about that.
Last time I came up, I was more than ready to head back to Saltillo. But my husband was waiting for me there. 2 weeks was a long time to be without him. This time, he is here with me. And we have been here long enough to have really settled in, for me to feel 'home' again here. I have no real excitement or urge to get back this time.
I am sure that once I am there, and in our home, back in our own little routine, that I will settle back in and be ok. But I have a feeling that the good-bye is going to be rough. And that getting back in our own little routine will take a little while (it will be much quieter and a bit lonelier not having several family members around at any given time).
Another factor here - last time I knew it wouldn't be too long before I saw everyone again. My dad had already started talking about bringing us up so everyone could meet the baby. This time, I have absolutely no idea when I will be back or see anyone from here again. I remember that feeling of not knowing how long it would be before I saw family a year ago - it easily brought me to tears on occasion. But I was also pregnant at the time, and therefore a bit more emotional than usual. So we'll see how that goes this time.
Ok, baby is fussing more and more - time to go...
We leave early Tuesday morning, and I am not too sure how I feel about that.
Last time I came up, I was more than ready to head back to Saltillo. But my husband was waiting for me there. 2 weeks was a long time to be without him. This time, he is here with me. And we have been here long enough to have really settled in, for me to feel 'home' again here. I have no real excitement or urge to get back this time.
I am sure that once I am there, and in our home, back in our own little routine, that I will settle back in and be ok. But I have a feeling that the good-bye is going to be rough. And that getting back in our own little routine will take a little while (it will be much quieter and a bit lonelier not having several family members around at any given time).
Another factor here - last time I knew it wouldn't be too long before I saw everyone again. My dad had already started talking about bringing us up so everyone could meet the baby. This time, I have absolutely no idea when I will be back or see anyone from here again. I remember that feeling of not knowing how long it would be before I saw family a year ago - it easily brought me to tears on occasion. But I was also pregnant at the time, and therefore a bit more emotional than usual. So we'll see how that goes this time.
Ok, baby is fussing more and more - time to go...
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Sorry - it's been waaayyyy too long!!
Ok, it has been an embarrassingly long time since I last blogged. Sorry about that. It had to do with online access/time, changes in schedule, hands full of baby.... and eventually just being out of the habit of blogging.
So, let's see. Just to quickly get back up to speed...
(BTW, after talking it over with my husband, I'm gonna start using his real name, Herme, here)
Without getting into all the details, we basically are completely broke and provided for at the same time. Herme left his job at the beginning of December and will be looking for a new one when we get back. We had about 10 days together before leaving Saltillo, which was really nice after all the crazy hours he worked over the last year+. Thanks to those of you who have been concerned about the job situation - sorry I have been so bad at replying! Obviously, we appreciate your prayers for a short search and a good find :)
It took some running around, but we were able to get all the passport related paperwork done in time and have finished passports in hand. (We have to travel with 2 passports for Katya, and a passport and a visa (for opposite countries) for Herme and I. Gets a little confusing!)
Katya did great on the flight up - slept and ate at the perfect times, barely made a peep all day, and even arrived awake and smiling to meet her grandpa and the first few aunts and uncles. I could really feel the prayers, between how great she did and how smoothly and quickly the day went despite a delay on our first flight causing us to arrive several hours later than planned. We discovered that I can go through American customs and immigration with Herme on the visitor side, which is nice because then we can go together and help each other juggle carry-ons and baby(s).
Our visit has been really nice, of course! :) I was grateful to see E&J and kids while they were in town visiting, as well and R&J and their new baby. We've seen both of my grandparents and almost all of my aunts and uncles and cousins. For five days in between Christmas and New Years, we had all of my siblings and their spouses and kids in my parents house - all 18 of us! It was really nice to get everyone together, the first time since my wedding. We're working on visiting assorted friends - many wanted to wait till the holidays were over. We stopped in today at my school to say hi to old coworkers. It was funny to see the looks the kids gave me - 1.5-2 years is a long time in the life of a kid to remember a teacher/principal.
Oh, and we have been very blessed by assorted gifts of money and clothes (mostly for the baby), as well as some favorite children's books and a couple of stuffed animals. :)
______________________
On a completely different note, I felt called to do something a while back and have wanted to share it here. I wrote a thank you note to President Bush for all his hard work over the past 8 years. Having been in leadership positions, I know how hard it can be.... although you try to do your best, it isn't always understood or appreciated. Many have written Bush off the last few months, many are pointing fingers and blaming him for a variety of problems. But I felt it important to acknowledge all he has done and invested these past 8 years. If you would like to encourage or thank him as well:
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500
or
comments@whitehouse.gov
or
Check this link for other contact related info.
-------------------
A few baby updates before I sign off...
She weighs about 15 pounds these days, and is about 3 1/2 months old already. We are beginning to feel like we have a decent routine coming together, although the travel and lots of people keep us from quite nailing it down. The last couple of weeks she has really 'come to life' - everyone always talks about the difference after hitting 3 months. It seemed all of a sudden that toys that barely caught her attention a short time ago, she now tries to grab at and can entertain herself for some time. She started rolling over 2 or 3 days ago (stomach to back), and not only smiles alot these days, but laughs alot too! She is really a very happy and easy to care for little girl, and everyone has been telling us how beautiful she is (so it's not just her proud parents that think so)! Oh, and she got her ears pierced just before we came up.
Well, I'll try not to wait around so long before the next post ;)
So, let's see. Just to quickly get back up to speed...
(BTW, after talking it over with my husband, I'm gonna start using his real name, Herme, here)
Without getting into all the details, we basically are completely broke and provided for at the same time. Herme left his job at the beginning of December and will be looking for a new one when we get back. We had about 10 days together before leaving Saltillo, which was really nice after all the crazy hours he worked over the last year+. Thanks to those of you who have been concerned about the job situation - sorry I have been so bad at replying! Obviously, we appreciate your prayers for a short search and a good find :)
It took some running around, but we were able to get all the passport related paperwork done in time and have finished passports in hand. (We have to travel with 2 passports for Katya, and a passport and a visa (for opposite countries) for Herme and I. Gets a little confusing!)
Katya did great on the flight up - slept and ate at the perfect times, barely made a peep all day, and even arrived awake and smiling to meet her grandpa and the first few aunts and uncles. I could really feel the prayers, between how great she did and how smoothly and quickly the day went despite a delay on our first flight causing us to arrive several hours later than planned. We discovered that I can go through American customs and immigration with Herme on the visitor side, which is nice because then we can go together and help each other juggle carry-ons and baby(s).
Our visit has been really nice, of course! :) I was grateful to see E&J and kids while they were in town visiting, as well and R&J and their new baby. We've seen both of my grandparents and almost all of my aunts and uncles and cousins. For five days in between Christmas and New Years, we had all of my siblings and their spouses and kids in my parents house - all 18 of us! It was really nice to get everyone together, the first time since my wedding. We're working on visiting assorted friends - many wanted to wait till the holidays were over. We stopped in today at my school to say hi to old coworkers. It was funny to see the looks the kids gave me - 1.5-2 years is a long time in the life of a kid to remember a teacher/principal.
Oh, and we have been very blessed by assorted gifts of money and clothes (mostly for the baby), as well as some favorite children's books and a couple of stuffed animals. :)
______________________
On a completely different note, I felt called to do something a while back and have wanted to share it here. I wrote a thank you note to President Bush for all his hard work over the past 8 years. Having been in leadership positions, I know how hard it can be.... although you try to do your best, it isn't always understood or appreciated. Many have written Bush off the last few months, many are pointing fingers and blaming him for a variety of problems. But I felt it important to acknowledge all he has done and invested these past 8 years. If you would like to encourage or thank him as well:
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500
or
comments@whitehouse.gov
or
Check this link for other contact related info.
-------------------
A few baby updates before I sign off...
She weighs about 15 pounds these days, and is about 3 1/2 months old already. We are beginning to feel like we have a decent routine coming together, although the travel and lots of people keep us from quite nailing it down. The last couple of weeks she has really 'come to life' - everyone always talks about the difference after hitting 3 months. It seemed all of a sudden that toys that barely caught her attention a short time ago, she now tries to grab at and can entertain herself for some time. She started rolling over 2 or 3 days ago (stomach to back), and not only smiles alot these days, but laughs alot too! She is really a very happy and easy to care for little girl, and everyone has been telling us how beautiful she is (so it's not just her proud parents that think so)! Oh, and she got her ears pierced just before we came up.
Well, I'll try not to wait around so long before the next post ;)
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
A Looooong Overdue Post - including a baby update
Yes, it has been truly ages since I´ve posted. I´ve since gone home (to my family in Rochester) and come home again (to my husband here in Mexico). Without spending a lot of time making excuses for my prolonged absence, I originally thought I might get some really good posting in while in Rochester with virtually unlimited internet access. Reflecting on why that didn´t happen, I think it is because since coming to Mexico, I´ve learned to see computer time as almost entirely for the purpose of staying in touch - and since I was already spending real time with the vast majority of people I would normally be staying in touch with, I wasn´t real motivated to get online. And I just haven´t gotten on much since getting back, for a variety of uninteresting reasons.
But the trip was great - I managed to spend time with all of my immediate family as well as each of the people on my short list of ´must sees´. That sounds simple, but keep in mind that I am the oldest of 7, and not all of my siblings live in Rochester these days. And coordinating the time to see them around the ´must sees´ busy schedules - I was glad I had kept my goal relatively simple and that I did in fact accomplish it. My apologies to those I wasn´t able to spend time with. I would have liked to, but there was only so much time to go around.
Otrgirl has written at different times about the energy it takes to keep up relationships long-distance. I must say that as good as it was to see everyone, it was also a bit exhausting at times. Of course, being pregnant might also have played a role in my tiredness.
I had lots of people ask me if it was weird to be back, but it was my home for the first 29 years of my life. It was just being home, being with family.
The biggest cultural observation that tickled me - how well trained Americans are to never touch a pregnant woman´s belly, at least without asking first. Here in Mexico, everyone touches my belly. It is often a part of their greeting or good-bye to me- an affectionate belly rub. I am one of those women who don´t actually mind at all, so that works. I´m not sure what it would look like if an American woman that hated belly touching moved to Mexico. But anyways, it was just funny to me to watch everyone´s restraint.
My final note on the trip home is that I missed my husband like crazy and was quite happy to find myself back hom with him when all was said and done.
As for the baby, we went for a check-up last Wednesday - my first visit in almost 2 months. After gaining only 3 pounds the first 4 1/2 months, this visit I had gained 11 pounds!! Guess I am all caught up on weight gain. Otherwise, baby and I both checked out as healthy and on target. The big news was finally getting a clear look at the baby´s gender. Remember this quote:
He said it is still a little early to be sure, and so he`d say he is abotu 80% certain that it is a..... boy! My beloved is thrilled, as he has been hoping for a boy since the beginning, and walked in the clouds the whole rest of the day :) For me it isn`t so important if we have a boy or girl, but it is fun to start thinking more specifically about who is inside of me, and to be able to use his name, etc. Don`t worry, though - we are both well aware that the Dr wasn`t sure, and are waiting for future ultrasounds to confirm.
Well.....as it turns out....the baby is actually a girl! So we had a couple of days of getting our mindset turned around, and now are thinking carefully about the names we didn´t think we´d be using yet :)
Ok, gotta run. But coming soon....photo fest! My sister gave me a memory card reader, so I think I should be able to easily load pics now :)
But the trip was great - I managed to spend time with all of my immediate family as well as each of the people on my short list of ´must sees´. That sounds simple, but keep in mind that I am the oldest of 7, and not all of my siblings live in Rochester these days. And coordinating the time to see them around the ´must sees´ busy schedules - I was glad I had kept my goal relatively simple and that I did in fact accomplish it. My apologies to those I wasn´t able to spend time with. I would have liked to, but there was only so much time to go around.
Otrgirl has written at different times about the energy it takes to keep up relationships long-distance. I must say that as good as it was to see everyone, it was also a bit exhausting at times. Of course, being pregnant might also have played a role in my tiredness.
I had lots of people ask me if it was weird to be back, but it was my home for the first 29 years of my life. It was just being home, being with family.
The biggest cultural observation that tickled me - how well trained Americans are to never touch a pregnant woman´s belly, at least without asking first. Here in Mexico, everyone touches my belly. It is often a part of their greeting or good-bye to me- an affectionate belly rub. I am one of those women who don´t actually mind at all, so that works. I´m not sure what it would look like if an American woman that hated belly touching moved to Mexico. But anyways, it was just funny to me to watch everyone´s restraint.
My final note on the trip home is that I missed my husband like crazy and was quite happy to find myself back hom with him when all was said and done.
As for the baby, we went for a check-up last Wednesday - my first visit in almost 2 months. After gaining only 3 pounds the first 4 1/2 months, this visit I had gained 11 pounds!! Guess I am all caught up on weight gain. Otherwise, baby and I both checked out as healthy and on target. The big news was finally getting a clear look at the baby´s gender. Remember this quote:
He said it is still a little early to be sure, and so he`d say he is abotu 80% certain that it is a..... boy! My beloved is thrilled, as he has been hoping for a boy since the beginning, and walked in the clouds the whole rest of the day :) For me it isn`t so important if we have a boy or girl, but it is fun to start thinking more specifically about who is inside of me, and to be able to use his name, etc. Don`t worry, though - we are both well aware that the Dr wasn`t sure, and are waiting for future ultrasounds to confirm.
Well.....as it turns out....the baby is actually a girl! So we had a couple of days of getting our mindset turned around, and now are thinking carefully about the names we didn´t think we´d be using yet :)
Ok, gotta run. But coming soon....photo fest! My sister gave me a memory card reader, so I think I should be able to easily load pics now :)
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
21 days and counting!
(Quick heads up - I double posted today. Thought I´d warn you all, since it is unusual for me and I don´t want you to miss anything...)
21 days from now I will be in Rochester!! For my first visit home since moving here this past December! I am obviously very excited!
I had not anticipated being able to make a visit home for quite some time, considering our tight budget and all. But a couple of weeks ago, my parents informed me that my dad has enough frequent flyer miles for a free ticket home. Yes, just one - I will be coming alone this trip. But my parents want to gift us with a trip up once the baby is born, for the 3 of us, so that we can introduce our little one to everyone back home. So I´ll be headed up again sometime next winter. All very exciting :)
I´ve been waiting to post about the trip until we settled on some dates. At first it was anytime between now and early August (when I will be too pregnant to make such a trip - airlines actually don´t allow people in their last month or month and a half to get on the plane.). Then we narrowed it down to either mid June or mid July, to work around family plans here and there. Then it looked like we would have a hard time using the free miles in July, and so mid June it would be.
THEN...My husband and I went to immigration on Friday to work on getting all my papers in order for continuing to live here. I currently just have a tourist visa, good for 180 days. Meaning it expires June 7th. So we started asking what we needed to do and working on all the paperwork back in April. Then we didn´t have a car for 2 weeks, and so couldn´t get any errands, etc, done. We got the car back last Tuesday, got the pictures I needed taken done on Wednesday, my love went in Thursday to ask the immigration folks about a couple things we weren´t sure about, and we headed in Friday thinking we had everything in order and ready to go.
Only to have the very immpatient and somewhat annoyed official suddenly start telling us that there are 2 types of visas from which we need to choose, involving different costs, different restrictions, and different outcomes (like the possibility of one day being a permanent resident or citizen here). She explained all of this very quickly, neither of us could quite keep up, forget making a good decision. And to top it off she informed us that we had forgotten one of the papers we needed, and if we didn´t make it back with it same day, it could stall things for 10 days.
Let me just say that one pregnant woman left that office crying.
Well, between the Dr´s appointment we had that morning, my beloved needing to work, and the short hours of the immigration office (they close at 1pm), we weren´t making it back same day. I where before I was slightly nervous about getting all the paperwork done before my trip home, now I was panicked. I begged my family to get some people praying for favor when we took the ´missing´paper in on Monday, as well as asking my Pastor and his wife here to pray. And I worked hard and trusting the Lord and not completely freaking out. I reminded myself that if the Lord could open the door for a trip, He could open the doors for the paperwork as well.
All thanks to the Lord, it turns out there is a very simple, straightfoward process for getting temporary paperwork that will allow me to make my trip, with only a relatively small fee of about $25. So, God willing, I will be in Rochester from June 10th to 25th!
(Umm, I don´t suppose Otrgirl/Jrex, Val, or Becca, or any other out of town friends were planning on stopping in Rochester for those dates...? Just checking....)
At first I was a little hesitant about leaving my husband for very long - we are newlyweds after all, and this will be our first time apart. Plus, he´s gonna have to move home with his mother or something while I am gone, because the man does not cook. But he really wants me to make the most of the opportunity, and it was he who encouraged me to go for at least a week, if not 2. And now my mind is quickly filling the 2 weeks up with all the people I want to see and things I want to do :)
As for the confusion of immigration - please pray. For reasons we do not understand, the immigration office went ahead and started the process for my visa despite missing that one paper and payment, and despite the fact that we never actually determined which we wanted. Of course, they started the paperwork for the other visa, the one we don´t want. So now we have to decide whether to enter into a complicated process of stopping the one and switching to the other, involving re-doing everything.....or going with the flow and waiting till next time around to get the one that puts me on a path to citizenship.
But, at least the door is open for the trip back to Rochester. You all better start blocking out some free time for me ;)
21 days from now I will be in Rochester!! For my first visit home since moving here this past December! I am obviously very excited!
I had not anticipated being able to make a visit home for quite some time, considering our tight budget and all. But a couple of weeks ago, my parents informed me that my dad has enough frequent flyer miles for a free ticket home. Yes, just one - I will be coming alone this trip. But my parents want to gift us with a trip up once the baby is born, for the 3 of us, so that we can introduce our little one to everyone back home. So I´ll be headed up again sometime next winter. All very exciting :)
I´ve been waiting to post about the trip until we settled on some dates. At first it was anytime between now and early August (when I will be too pregnant to make such a trip - airlines actually don´t allow people in their last month or month and a half to get on the plane.). Then we narrowed it down to either mid June or mid July, to work around family plans here and there. Then it looked like we would have a hard time using the free miles in July, and so mid June it would be.
THEN...My husband and I went to immigration on Friday to work on getting all my papers in order for continuing to live here. I currently just have a tourist visa, good for 180 days. Meaning it expires June 7th. So we started asking what we needed to do and working on all the paperwork back in April. Then we didn´t have a car for 2 weeks, and so couldn´t get any errands, etc, done. We got the car back last Tuesday, got the pictures I needed taken done on Wednesday, my love went in Thursday to ask the immigration folks about a couple things we weren´t sure about, and we headed in Friday thinking we had everything in order and ready to go.
Only to have the very immpatient and somewhat annoyed official suddenly start telling us that there are 2 types of visas from which we need to choose, involving different costs, different restrictions, and different outcomes (like the possibility of one day being a permanent resident or citizen here). She explained all of this very quickly, neither of us could quite keep up, forget making a good decision. And to top it off she informed us that we had forgotten one of the papers we needed, and if we didn´t make it back with it same day, it could stall things for 10 days.
Let me just say that one pregnant woman left that office crying.
Well, between the Dr´s appointment we had that morning, my beloved needing to work, and the short hours of the immigration office (they close at 1pm), we weren´t making it back same day. I where before I was slightly nervous about getting all the paperwork done before my trip home, now I was panicked. I begged my family to get some people praying for favor when we took the ´missing´paper in on Monday, as well as asking my Pastor and his wife here to pray. And I worked hard and trusting the Lord and not completely freaking out. I reminded myself that if the Lord could open the door for a trip, He could open the doors for the paperwork as well.
All thanks to the Lord, it turns out there is a very simple, straightfoward process for getting temporary paperwork that will allow me to make my trip, with only a relatively small fee of about $25. So, God willing, I will be in Rochester from June 10th to 25th!
(Umm, I don´t suppose Otrgirl/Jrex, Val, or Becca, or any other out of town friends were planning on stopping in Rochester for those dates...? Just checking....)
At first I was a little hesitant about leaving my husband for very long - we are newlyweds after all, and this will be our first time apart. Plus, he´s gonna have to move home with his mother or something while I am gone, because the man does not cook. But he really wants me to make the most of the opportunity, and it was he who encouraged me to go for at least a week, if not 2. And now my mind is quickly filling the 2 weeks up with all the people I want to see and things I want to do :)
As for the confusion of immigration - please pray. For reasons we do not understand, the immigration office went ahead and started the process for my visa despite missing that one paper and payment, and despite the fact that we never actually determined which we wanted. Of course, they started the paperwork for the other visa, the one we don´t want. So now we have to decide whether to enter into a complicated process of stopping the one and switching to the other, involving re-doing everything.....or going with the flow and waiting till next time around to get the one that puts me on a path to citizenship.
But, at least the door is open for the trip back to Rochester. You all better start blocking out some free time for me ;)
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Vacation Days, Or Not (and an announcement at the end...)
Week before last was Holy Week - and in a predominately Catholic country, that is a big deal. Everyone gets lots of time off. Kids had last week and this week home from school. Something like 90% of the country got off Holy Thursday and Good Friday. And the way it works out this year, with Easter being so early, 90% also got off last Monday in celebration of some famous President here.
We were under the impression, leading up to Holy Week, that my beloved would have off Monday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday (he generally works 1/2 days Saturdays, which means half the number of clients visited - not necessarily half the time). So we made plans for a day trip on Monday, thinking later in the week we´d have a lazy day. Lazy days are few and far between (meaning in large part we can sleep in, and get up when we are in the mood, istead of rushing out) - since FB works Monday thru Saturday and the last Sunday of every month, that only leaves Sunday. But of course we get up and go to church on Sundays. So, lazy days...? I think we´ve had one since we returned from the honeymoon.
Instead, he had to work Thursday, Saturday, and....drumroll please....EASTER SUNDAY!
I am sure you all understand the logic there - since clients really want to open their door to a stranger to talk about being behind in their payments on EASTER SUNDAY, if they are even home and didn´t take off on a vacation somewhere. No, the logic was - you all had off Monday and Friday - better work Sunday. And since the office closed a little early Thursday, FB had to hit up the office before getting started on Saturday to finish up from Thursday. Then when he finished for the day, he had to prepare all his visits for both Sunday and Monday. So Saturday was a long day of work.
Monday and Friday, the days he did get off, were´t bad, just not lazy days like we´d been looking forward to.
Monday we did the day trip to a pretty and quaint little town about 2 hours away. The 2 of us had been there once before. This time we took along another young married couple and their little boy. I had just recently been thinking we should hang out once in a while (when there´s time - which is the whole issue) with other young marrieds, so I was fine with Herme´s spur of the moment idea to invite them Saturday night. The weather was weird that day, lots and lots of wind, carrying lots and lots of dust. And spring hadn´t quite arrived there like we´d hoped. But we ate at a nice restaurant and then spent several hours at a park where they have created a pond (they call it a lake, cuz there isn´t much water here. but it is only a pond). The temperature was nice, even if it was windy, and we had an enjoyable time, a mix of keeping to ourselves and hanging out all together. Just before heading home, we hit up a vineyard museum, which was interesting, but would have been more so if the guide talked just a little bit slower.
One highlight for me was a stop at the street market on the way out of town. FB and I had stopped there when we were there a little over a year ago, and he bought me a pink shawl. I wore it when announcing our engagement here and in Rochester, and subsequently on any chilly day when I wanted to feel like my fiance was a little closer to me. It was very pretty, and an important memory item for me. But I lost it a couple of months ago. I think what happened was that it was on my lap in the car, and I forgot when I got up to get out and it fell. By the time we realized it, it was long gone. I was devastated. (And for those of you who know, this happened like the same week as another major possession loss.) But anyways, we found the same vendor and bought another shawl. She didn´t have the same color, but otherwise it is the same, and it comforts me to have it.
Friday, we got up about the same time as a workday and headed to a Good Firday service. It`s a gathering of many churches that all form an alliance, and different people from different churches take turns reading the last 7 things Jesus said during the crucifixion. Afterwards, there was a picnic style lunch and everyone fellowshipped for a bit. And in the culture here, that means everyone packed a whole lot of one thing and shared it with everyone else. Everyone always shares here. It was good, and lasted til about mid afternoon. I got sunburned - didn`t know it was outside, and apparently the tarps providing my shade were not all that protective. AFterwards, we spent some time with my in-laws, then headed home to get that budget done.
Easter Sunday our church did a sunrise service (although the sun never rose, it was one of those rare cloudy and chilly days here), so we were able to go to service before FB had to work, which was nice.
The other part of that week that kept life interesting was that when we returned to town Monday evening from our day trip, we headed straight over to my in-laws to pick up 3 very excited children. Our 2 nieces (10 and 7) and great-nephew (6) had been dying to spend the night at our house for weeks. And since they were on vacation for 2 weeks, they came and stayed with us until Thursday morning. Great vacation for them - a bit exhausting for me!
Remember the weird windy weather we had Monday? Well, Tuesday morning, the temperature dropped to the 40s, and there was so much dirt being carried in the wind that visibility was bad. And dirt was coming in thru every crevice of the house - door jams, windows, you name it. So, I had 3 very excited children stuck inside for the better part of the day. I have no toys other than a game of Dominos, a few childrens books, but mostly in English, and no TV - and a pretty small house. The saving grace was when I remembered late in the day the Play-Doh recipe I had - all dead time from that moment on was spent pretending to be a bakery or restaurant. (By the way, the recipe was from a cook-book the church ladies put together back in Rochester a year or 2 ago. Any one from there reading this - I love that little book and reading what you all wrote, and have used several recipes already!)
The next day we had much nicer weather, walked the 20ish minutes to visit someone from church and later hit up a nearby playground. Still tiring, but in a less anxious, pent up kind of way. I taught the kids Mother, May I? and Red Light, Green Light. Since hardly anyone here has any yard to speak of (homes are usually all built right up against each other), any time spend at a playground or even in an open patch of grass is much enjoyed.
Ok, this post is a book. I promise the others I am planning to write shouldn`t be quite this long. But as computer time in the next few days will be devoted to getting my taxes done, I`m not sure when the next post will be. I do hope to write fairly soon, though, because my second prenatal appointment is Friday. Can you believe that today officially marks the beginning of my 2nd trimester already?! And yes, I am trying to figure out how to post the occassional picture of my growing belly.
Oh, and I forgot to post last week in the midst of all my catching up, that I am an aunt again!! My brother and his wife welcomed their first into the world Saturday, March 22. From what I am told, she`s beautiful, with lots of hair. It`s crazy hard not knowing when I will meet her. But then, as they live just that far away from the rest of the family, only my parents have been able to meet her so far, and the others aren`t sure when they will. This is the first baby that we all (or almost all) didn`t meet in the first 48 hours - times are changing in our family I guess.
We were under the impression, leading up to Holy Week, that my beloved would have off Monday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday (he generally works 1/2 days Saturdays, which means half the number of clients visited - not necessarily half the time). So we made plans for a day trip on Monday, thinking later in the week we´d have a lazy day. Lazy days are few and far between (meaning in large part we can sleep in, and get up when we are in the mood, istead of rushing out) - since FB works Monday thru Saturday and the last Sunday of every month, that only leaves Sunday. But of course we get up and go to church on Sundays. So, lazy days...? I think we´ve had one since we returned from the honeymoon.
Instead, he had to work Thursday, Saturday, and....drumroll please....EASTER SUNDAY!
I am sure you all understand the logic there - since clients really want to open their door to a stranger to talk about being behind in their payments on EASTER SUNDAY, if they are even home and didn´t take off on a vacation somewhere. No, the logic was - you all had off Monday and Friday - better work Sunday. And since the office closed a little early Thursday, FB had to hit up the office before getting started on Saturday to finish up from Thursday. Then when he finished for the day, he had to prepare all his visits for both Sunday and Monday. So Saturday was a long day of work.
Monday and Friday, the days he did get off, were´t bad, just not lazy days like we´d been looking forward to.
Monday we did the day trip to a pretty and quaint little town about 2 hours away. The 2 of us had been there once before. This time we took along another young married couple and their little boy. I had just recently been thinking we should hang out once in a while (when there´s time - which is the whole issue) with other young marrieds, so I was fine with Herme´s spur of the moment idea to invite them Saturday night. The weather was weird that day, lots and lots of wind, carrying lots and lots of dust. And spring hadn´t quite arrived there like we´d hoped. But we ate at a nice restaurant and then spent several hours at a park where they have created a pond (they call it a lake, cuz there isn´t much water here. but it is only a pond). The temperature was nice, even if it was windy, and we had an enjoyable time, a mix of keeping to ourselves and hanging out all together. Just before heading home, we hit up a vineyard museum, which was interesting, but would have been more so if the guide talked just a little bit slower.
One highlight for me was a stop at the street market on the way out of town. FB and I had stopped there when we were there a little over a year ago, and he bought me a pink shawl. I wore it when announcing our engagement here and in Rochester, and subsequently on any chilly day when I wanted to feel like my fiance was a little closer to me. It was very pretty, and an important memory item for me. But I lost it a couple of months ago. I think what happened was that it was on my lap in the car, and I forgot when I got up to get out and it fell. By the time we realized it, it was long gone. I was devastated. (And for those of you who know, this happened like the same week as another major possession loss.) But anyways, we found the same vendor and bought another shawl. She didn´t have the same color, but otherwise it is the same, and it comforts me to have it.
Friday, we got up about the same time as a workday and headed to a Good Firday service. It`s a gathering of many churches that all form an alliance, and different people from different churches take turns reading the last 7 things Jesus said during the crucifixion. Afterwards, there was a picnic style lunch and everyone fellowshipped for a bit. And in the culture here, that means everyone packed a whole lot of one thing and shared it with everyone else. Everyone always shares here. It was good, and lasted til about mid afternoon. I got sunburned - didn`t know it was outside, and apparently the tarps providing my shade were not all that protective. AFterwards, we spent some time with my in-laws, then headed home to get that budget done.
Easter Sunday our church did a sunrise service (although the sun never rose, it was one of those rare cloudy and chilly days here), so we were able to go to service before FB had to work, which was nice.
The other part of that week that kept life interesting was that when we returned to town Monday evening from our day trip, we headed straight over to my in-laws to pick up 3 very excited children. Our 2 nieces (10 and 7) and great-nephew (6) had been dying to spend the night at our house for weeks. And since they were on vacation for 2 weeks, they came and stayed with us until Thursday morning. Great vacation for them - a bit exhausting for me!
Remember the weird windy weather we had Monday? Well, Tuesday morning, the temperature dropped to the 40s, and there was so much dirt being carried in the wind that visibility was bad. And dirt was coming in thru every crevice of the house - door jams, windows, you name it. So, I had 3 very excited children stuck inside for the better part of the day. I have no toys other than a game of Dominos, a few childrens books, but mostly in English, and no TV - and a pretty small house. The saving grace was when I remembered late in the day the Play-Doh recipe I had - all dead time from that moment on was spent pretending to be a bakery or restaurant. (By the way, the recipe was from a cook-book the church ladies put together back in Rochester a year or 2 ago. Any one from there reading this - I love that little book and reading what you all wrote, and have used several recipes already!)
The next day we had much nicer weather, walked the 20ish minutes to visit someone from church and later hit up a nearby playground. Still tiring, but in a less anxious, pent up kind of way. I taught the kids Mother, May I? and Red Light, Green Light. Since hardly anyone here has any yard to speak of (homes are usually all built right up against each other), any time spend at a playground or even in an open patch of grass is much enjoyed.
Ok, this post is a book. I promise the others I am planning to write shouldn`t be quite this long. But as computer time in the next few days will be devoted to getting my taxes done, I`m not sure when the next post will be. I do hope to write fairly soon, though, because my second prenatal appointment is Friday. Can you believe that today officially marks the beginning of my 2nd trimester already?! And yes, I am trying to figure out how to post the occassional picture of my growing belly.
Oh, and I forgot to post last week in the midst of all my catching up, that I am an aunt again!! My brother and his wife welcomed their first into the world Saturday, March 22. From what I am told, she`s beautiful, with lots of hair. It`s crazy hard not knowing when I will meet her. But then, as they live just that far away from the rest of the family, only my parents have been able to meet her so far, and the others aren`t sure when they will. This is the first baby that we all (or almost all) didn`t meet in the first 48 hours - times are changing in our family I guess.
Monday, December 10, 2007
The Adventure Begins...
So, I promised a post about how God used my long engagement for good, but I'm all out of time. Suffice it to say that a year ago, I cried every time my family talked about Christmas presents and whether we should pull names since there are so many of us (I ended up being the one person that exchanged gifts with everyone), and this year I happily watched as they pulled names without including me at all. My point is, I'm not usually good with change, but I think with the long engagement I've had, God has been able to prepare me and walk me through all the emotions little by little.
I leave, as in move to another country, in an hour and a half!
My man has been here since late Thursday night, and in case anyone wasn't sure, I've got an awesome man to become my husband. This was an exhausting, overwhelming weekend for him. But he managed to walk it out quite gracefully, AND consistently put his own feelings aside to help me walk out my good-byes. Which, all things considered, I've handled pretty well. There must be people praying for me! Don't get me wrong, there were tears each time I said good-bye to the next person, but only ever a few, and I never got overwhelmed by sadness or anything.
That's a really short, doesn't do it justice, description of where I'm at and what I'm up to. But I gotta get moving.
One more thing....FB and my family really connected well, I think. Which is awesome for me.
Ok, next time I write, I'll be in Mexico. I have no clue when that will be, but I will be back. Promise.
I leave, as in move to another country, in an hour and a half!
My man has been here since late Thursday night, and in case anyone wasn't sure, I've got an awesome man to become my husband. This was an exhausting, overwhelming weekend for him. But he managed to walk it out quite gracefully, AND consistently put his own feelings aside to help me walk out my good-byes. Which, all things considered, I've handled pretty well. There must be people praying for me! Don't get me wrong, there were tears each time I said good-bye to the next person, but only ever a few, and I never got overwhelmed by sadness or anything.
That's a really short, doesn't do it justice, description of where I'm at and what I'm up to. But I gotta get moving.
One more thing....FB and my family really connected well, I think. Which is awesome for me.
Ok, next time I write, I'll be in Mexico. I have no clue when that will be, but I will be back. Promise.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
What to say?
I couldn't help but notice (you may have as well) that I have posted significantly less this month than the last couple of months. I got to wondering why that was, since I have at least as much time now for it as I have had. The conclusion I reached is that my focus is so narrow right now, I feel like I'll only be repeating myself. The cycle of emotions I posted a few days ago pretty much sums up where I am at lately.
But a couple of new things I can share...
I didn't expect to be here still for Thanksgiving. I'm truly looking forward to fully enjoying tomorrow. All of my siblings and their spouses and/or children will be there (the first time since the end of July). We'll be at my aunt's (my mom's younger sister) like we have been every year about as long as I remember. My aunt and uncle will make way too much food, we'll end up laughing hysterically with my grandmother over next to nothing...the same things that happen every year and are that much more special because of it. An extra special element this year - I am bringing my wedding dress (as well as all the extras like the veil and jewelry) to try on for my grandmother. Since the trip to Mexico would much too much for her at almost-95, I'm looking forward to being able to at least share this much of the wedding experience with her.
I've already chatted with FB about creating our own Thanksgiving tradition in Mexico. We'd have to do it on a Saturday so that people would have the time to join us. But I'm looking forward to an opportunity to share some of my traditions and memories with friends and family there.
-------------------------------
Just in case anyone lost track, my fiance will be here 2 weeks from tomorrow...
-------------------------------
Something I just recently found out about and am looking forward to quite a bit - apparently my future sisters-in-law and future landlady (also a friend) are planning a bridal shower for me the first Saturday after I arrive in Saltillo! I'm really excited to be able to see friends and celebrate with them! And since they are holding it so early after my arrival, I'll quickly have a better handle on what we'll need to purchase.
Other than that, the only real news is that plans are coming together for the few days that FB will be here. I've sent out email invites to an Open House for that Saturday, my old coworkers are planning a short shower type party for us, I'm going to talk to grandma tomorrow about a visit with her that Friday morning, and still need to talk to my grandfather about a visit with him. I'm the only one able to meet him when he arrives, as most people will be at work or school, but that will give him a little bit to reorient himself after a long day.
Well, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!
But a couple of new things I can share...
I didn't expect to be here still for Thanksgiving. I'm truly looking forward to fully enjoying tomorrow. All of my siblings and their spouses and/or children will be there (the first time since the end of July). We'll be at my aunt's (my mom's younger sister) like we have been every year about as long as I remember. My aunt and uncle will make way too much food, we'll end up laughing hysterically with my grandmother over next to nothing...the same things that happen every year and are that much more special because of it. An extra special element this year - I am bringing my wedding dress (as well as all the extras like the veil and jewelry) to try on for my grandmother. Since the trip to Mexico would much too much for her at almost-95, I'm looking forward to being able to at least share this much of the wedding experience with her.
I've already chatted with FB about creating our own Thanksgiving tradition in Mexico. We'd have to do it on a Saturday so that people would have the time to join us. But I'm looking forward to an opportunity to share some of my traditions and memories with friends and family there.
-------------------------------
Just in case anyone lost track, my fiance will be here 2 weeks from tomorrow...
-------------------------------
Something I just recently found out about and am looking forward to quite a bit - apparently my future sisters-in-law and future landlady (also a friend) are planning a bridal shower for me the first Saturday after I arrive in Saltillo! I'm really excited to be able to see friends and celebrate with them! And since they are holding it so early after my arrival, I'll quickly have a better handle on what we'll need to purchase.
Other than that, the only real news is that plans are coming together for the few days that FB will be here. I've sent out email invites to an Open House for that Saturday, my old coworkers are planning a short shower type party for us, I'm going to talk to grandma tomorrow about a visit with her that Friday morning, and still need to talk to my grandfather about a visit with him. I'm the only one able to meet him when he arrives, as most people will be at work or school, but that will give him a little bit to reorient himself after a long day.
Well, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
I've never been much of a shower person. As in, bridal and baby showers. I go, and I'm glad to bless the person being honored with some type of gift - I appreciate the purpose of showers. But I've never really enjoyed going to them. I mostly endure them.
But I really enjoyed the one I went to on Friday night. Do you think it might be because it was my bridal shower?
I'm trying to decide if I've actually always disliked showers because it was a reminder of how much I wished I had a husband and children, or if I just enjoyed my own so much more because it was such a tangible sign of the fact that I'm truly getting married and there was such an outpouring of love from good friends.
I really was blessed. It was a good time of seeing and chatting with a variety of friends. People were generous (and complied with the request for cash/checks only due to my situation). I felt very loved by the people that put time and energy into making it happen. And they created a priceless gift for me as the evening went on - video taped messages for me to watch when I'm far away and homesick. This was mostly done without my knowledge over the course of the evening. And then at the end, a few brave souls shared things (memories, reasons they'd miss me, how they've seen God use me) in front of everyone. Lots of tears were shed. And I was reminded of the depth of relationship I have with so many wonderful women here. I hope and pray I am able to create such relationships in Mexico with time.
I sometimes wonder if I'll be able to stand the pain of being away from both my blood family and church family here. I am so close to so many. And then I remember that I am positive this move is a God thing, and that is everything I need and is faithful to provide for my every need.
And just cause you're probably all wondering, as everyone else in my life is, when I'm leaving and/or when FB is coming here....I still don't know either of those things. I am still waiting, still working on flexibility (and still very bored with my job). And once again I am waiting to hear from my man - it has been almost a week since our last (45 min) conversation. Apparently, this new job of his is keeping him very busy. When I start to get discouraged about this fact meaning that he will probably won't have tons of time for me when I first move there, I remind myself that simply getting to be physically in his presence on a regular basis will be umpteen times better than the current situation.
Sorry if this is getting choppy at the end. I'm not sure why I feel like I'm not expressing myself clearly.
But the good news is, the wedding is only 102 days (or 14 1/2 weeks) away. Which means I will be with my beloved sometime in the next 100 days or less.
But I really enjoyed the one I went to on Friday night. Do you think it might be because it was my bridal shower?
I'm trying to decide if I've actually always disliked showers because it was a reminder of how much I wished I had a husband and children, or if I just enjoyed my own so much more because it was such a tangible sign of the fact that I'm truly getting married and there was such an outpouring of love from good friends.
I really was blessed. It was a good time of seeing and chatting with a variety of friends. People were generous (and complied with the request for cash/checks only due to my situation). I felt very loved by the people that put time and energy into making it happen. And they created a priceless gift for me as the evening went on - video taped messages for me to watch when I'm far away and homesick. This was mostly done without my knowledge over the course of the evening. And then at the end, a few brave souls shared things (memories, reasons they'd miss me, how they've seen God use me) in front of everyone. Lots of tears were shed. And I was reminded of the depth of relationship I have with so many wonderful women here. I hope and pray I am able to create such relationships in Mexico with time.
I sometimes wonder if I'll be able to stand the pain of being away from both my blood family and church family here. I am so close to so many. And then I remember that I am positive this move is a God thing, and that is everything I need and is faithful to provide for my every need.
And just cause you're probably all wondering, as everyone else in my life is, when I'm leaving and/or when FB is coming here....I still don't know either of those things. I am still waiting, still working on flexibility (and still very bored with my job). And once again I am waiting to hear from my man - it has been almost a week since our last (45 min) conversation. Apparently, this new job of his is keeping him very busy. When I start to get discouraged about this fact meaning that he will probably won't have tons of time for me when I first move there, I remind myself that simply getting to be physically in his presence on a regular basis will be umpteen times better than the current situation.
Sorry if this is getting choppy at the end. I'm not sure why I feel like I'm not expressing myself clearly.
But the good news is, the wedding is only 102 days (or 14 1/2 weeks) away. Which means I will be with my beloved sometime in the next 100 days or less.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Independence
I've been giving this concept some thought lately. This is partly due to comparing Mexican culture to American culture. One thing I've noticed is how Mexican culture is more family and community oriented, while America tends to breed an independent streak. Look at how we became a nation. It is in our blood.
Hmm, I'm having trouble organizing my thoughts well. Sorry if this comes out a little choppy.
It is interesting to look at how this cultural difference plays out generationally. For example, in America, we encourage and expect young adults to move out on their own. It is often considered a sign of maturity, or a way to attain maturity, if someone in the 18 - mid 20's range moves out of their parents' place into an apartment. In Mexico, on the other hand, it is extremely rare for a single adult to move out of their parents' home, and oftentimes newlyweds continue to live at home for the first couple of years. There's no negative connotation for doing so, but rather is expected.
At the other end of the spectrum, in Mexico it is expected and understood that the elderly will be cared for by family. Widows are supported by their children. I've never seen or heard yet of nursing homes or adult care facilities there. In contrast, many Americans struggle with the issue of how to care for the elderly. Either the elderly person is determined to maintain their accustomed lifestyle for as long as possible, or their children look for ways to provide them care without it having too big an impact on their own lives.
I've been giving thought to both ends of the spectrum in my own life and family lately. My remaining grandmother is 94 years old, and has stubbornly lived alone up to this point. She can hardly entertain the notion of leaving her home, has blocked almost every attempt we've made to offer help (for example, canceling Meals on Wheels within the first 48 hours). She's been in the hospital since Saturday; there's a diagnosis of congestive heart failure. Where walking was slow and difficult for her before, it's dangerous now. We can't send her home to live alone again, but we are equally sure she will protest any other option.
I've been thinking about the changes in my own life recently. A year ago (well, up to a few months ago), I lived alone. I was an elementary school principal. I was very action oriented, a problem solver, decision maker. Now? I live with my family. I am at the bottom of the totem pole at my workplace. I'm soon to move to another country, but the timing of said move is out of my hands. Interestingly, realizing the changes in my position have made me more trusting of my fiance.
I don't know how well all that makes sense to anyone else, but I needed to write it out. I'm curious to understand the cultural difference better as time goes on, and the impact those differences have in people's everyday lives. And I am glad I know the One who is in control of it all.
Hmm, I'm having trouble organizing my thoughts well. Sorry if this comes out a little choppy.
It is interesting to look at how this cultural difference plays out generationally. For example, in America, we encourage and expect young adults to move out on their own. It is often considered a sign of maturity, or a way to attain maturity, if someone in the 18 - mid 20's range moves out of their parents' place into an apartment. In Mexico, on the other hand, it is extremely rare for a single adult to move out of their parents' home, and oftentimes newlyweds continue to live at home for the first couple of years. There's no negative connotation for doing so, but rather is expected.
At the other end of the spectrum, in Mexico it is expected and understood that the elderly will be cared for by family. Widows are supported by their children. I've never seen or heard yet of nursing homes or adult care facilities there. In contrast, many Americans struggle with the issue of how to care for the elderly. Either the elderly person is determined to maintain their accustomed lifestyle for as long as possible, or their children look for ways to provide them care without it having too big an impact on their own lives.
I've been giving thought to both ends of the spectrum in my own life and family lately. My remaining grandmother is 94 years old, and has stubbornly lived alone up to this point. She can hardly entertain the notion of leaving her home, has blocked almost every attempt we've made to offer help (for example, canceling Meals on Wheels within the first 48 hours). She's been in the hospital since Saturday; there's a diagnosis of congestive heart failure. Where walking was slow and difficult for her before, it's dangerous now. We can't send her home to live alone again, but we are equally sure she will protest any other option.
I've been thinking about the changes in my own life recently. A year ago (well, up to a few months ago), I lived alone. I was an elementary school principal. I was very action oriented, a problem solver, decision maker. Now? I live with my family. I am at the bottom of the totem pole at my workplace. I'm soon to move to another country, but the timing of said move is out of my hands. Interestingly, realizing the changes in my position have made me more trusting of my fiance.
I don't know how well all that makes sense to anyone else, but I needed to write it out. I'm curious to understand the cultural difference better as time goes on, and the impact those differences have in people's everyday lives. And I am glad I know the One who is in control of it all.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Flexibility, you say?
I finally got to talk (online) to my man last night. Hooray! It'd been almost a full week. And we're chatting again tonight, with cameras. Hooray again! We haven't 'seen' each other in almost 2 weeks.
But he still doesn't know when he'll be able to come up. Apparently his boss has been too busy lately for him to sit down and talk to him. I don't think I'll be leaving the 1st week of October after all. At this point, I'd be shocked if he's able to come then.
My dad asked last night what I would do if his boss doesn't let him come up. FB is currently on a 3month 'trial' type contract. My dad seemed to think it might be difficult to leave for a week under such circumstances since his pay and review are tied into his productivity and performance.
I've tried not to think to much about this being a possibility. But I told my dad it mattered more how the family took it than me. The visit is for the family's sake, to be able to meet him and get to know him a little before I marry him. Yes, I'd be disappointed, but I know there will be other opportunities for him to get glimpses of my life here. But there won't be other opportunities for my siblings, grandparents, etc, to get to know him before the wedding. My mom has never met him, but maybe she could come down with me before the wedding when I move down.
I'm trying to remain flexible here and not be too tied to any one plan, since it is all still one big unknown. I hope to express clearly to my love tonight that the pressure is off him - we'll all understand if his boss doesn't let him come, or if it is much later than we originally planned. And I'll live if I end up moving down later than I'd like. He's got enough pressure on him without feeling like he'll have lost favor with my family before he's even met them, especially since it isn't really within his control.
I'm probably pretty normal in feeling more secure and prepared when I know what to expect and when. But I can do flexible. Honest I can. Really, I'll get over the anxious, stressed out feeling in the pit of my stomach, and I'll go with the flow. After all, the Lord sent me this verse yesterday, through a woman I hardly know...
"In the multitude of my anxieties within me,
Your comforts delight my soul."
Psalm 94:19 (NKJV)
But he still doesn't know when he'll be able to come up. Apparently his boss has been too busy lately for him to sit down and talk to him. I don't think I'll be leaving the 1st week of October after all. At this point, I'd be shocked if he's able to come then.
My dad asked last night what I would do if his boss doesn't let him come up. FB is currently on a 3month 'trial' type contract. My dad seemed to think it might be difficult to leave for a week under such circumstances since his pay and review are tied into his productivity and performance.
I've tried not to think to much about this being a possibility. But I told my dad it mattered more how the family took it than me. The visit is for the family's sake, to be able to meet him and get to know him a little before I marry him. Yes, I'd be disappointed, but I know there will be other opportunities for him to get glimpses of my life here. But there won't be other opportunities for my siblings, grandparents, etc, to get to know him before the wedding. My mom has never met him, but maybe she could come down with me before the wedding when I move down.
I'm trying to remain flexible here and not be too tied to any one plan, since it is all still one big unknown. I hope to express clearly to my love tonight that the pressure is off him - we'll all understand if his boss doesn't let him come, or if it is much later than we originally planned. And I'll live if I end up moving down later than I'd like. He's got enough pressure on him without feeling like he'll have lost favor with my family before he's even met them, especially since it isn't really within his control.
I'm probably pretty normal in feeling more secure and prepared when I know what to expect and when. But I can do flexible. Honest I can. Really, I'll get over the anxious, stressed out feeling in the pit of my stomach, and I'll go with the flow. After all, the Lord sent me this verse yesterday, through a woman I hardly know...
"In the multitude of my anxieties within me,
Your comforts delight my soul."
Psalm 94:19 (NKJV)
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
The waiting game
So, I'm writing this post because to write about the wait makes it feel like I'm doing something more than just waiting. All in my head, I know, but it doesn't hurt anything :)
I'm currently playing the waiting game on 2 fronts. I'll start with the shorter and more straightforward of the 2.
My sister-in-law is in labor as we speak. She debated all yesterday evening whether she was really in labor, went in around 4am this morning, and things have been moving slowly. Waiting for a birth is always exciting, but more so since we don't know if it is a boy or a girl. This will be their 3rd - they already have one of each.
The second has to do with my man. We chatted last on Thursday evening (8/31). He told me he thought we'd next be able to talk on Monday (9/3). That's a little on the long side for us, but not unheard of, depending on what's going on. He had already informed me that he hoped to talk to his new boss on Friday about when he might be able to get the time off for his visit here. So I asked if he could email me sooner than Monday if he got an answer. He agreed, and said he'd also tell me in the email what time he'd be able to talk on Monday (I'm thinking he needed to get a better feel for his hours at his new job). So that was fine, and the waiting began. I knew better than to expect anything earlier than Saturday afternoon or evening. But finding out the date for his visit (and thus the date I'll be moving, as I plan to return with him) had me way too excited. If per chance he was able to write earlier than I expected, I didn't want to miss it. I started checking for his email Friday evening. Saturday, I held off checking till the afternoon, knowing he was busy early in the day. I checked a couple more times as the evening passed. Sunday I knew he'd be at church till mid-afternoon, but checked a couple of times before heading to bed. By Monday, I was having trouble not checking every 1/2 hour or something. Especially since I had left my plans flexible for Monday so I'd be available to talk that evening as planned. But Monday passed with no word. As of 30 seconds ago, I've still not heard from him. I'm guessing at this point that it means he has been so busy he hasn't been able to sit down and write me (keep in mind he has to go to a cyber cafe to use a computer for any kind of personal use). But not only is it killing me to wait on the answer from his boss about when he can come, I hate when I don't know when we'll next talk. It always makes it feel even longer than it is.
Ah well, in either instance, all I can do is pray. And wait.
I'll keep you posted.
I'm currently playing the waiting game on 2 fronts. I'll start with the shorter and more straightforward of the 2.
My sister-in-law is in labor as we speak. She debated all yesterday evening whether she was really in labor, went in around 4am this morning, and things have been moving slowly. Waiting for a birth is always exciting, but more so since we don't know if it is a boy or a girl. This will be their 3rd - they already have one of each.
The second has to do with my man. We chatted last on Thursday evening (8/31). He told me he thought we'd next be able to talk on Monday (9/3). That's a little on the long side for us, but not unheard of, depending on what's going on. He had already informed me that he hoped to talk to his new boss on Friday about when he might be able to get the time off for his visit here. So I asked if he could email me sooner than Monday if he got an answer. He agreed, and said he'd also tell me in the email what time he'd be able to talk on Monday (I'm thinking he needed to get a better feel for his hours at his new job). So that was fine, and the waiting began. I knew better than to expect anything earlier than Saturday afternoon or evening. But finding out the date for his visit (and thus the date I'll be moving, as I plan to return with him) had me way too excited. If per chance he was able to write earlier than I expected, I didn't want to miss it. I started checking for his email Friday evening. Saturday, I held off checking till the afternoon, knowing he was busy early in the day. I checked a couple more times as the evening passed. Sunday I knew he'd be at church till mid-afternoon, but checked a couple of times before heading to bed. By Monday, I was having trouble not checking every 1/2 hour or something. Especially since I had left my plans flexible for Monday so I'd be available to talk that evening as planned. But Monday passed with no word. As of 30 seconds ago, I've still not heard from him. I'm guessing at this point that it means he has been so busy he hasn't been able to sit down and write me (keep in mind he has to go to a cyber cafe to use a computer for any kind of personal use). But not only is it killing me to wait on the answer from his boss about when he can come, I hate when I don't know when we'll next talk. It always makes it feel even longer than it is.
Ah well, in either instance, all I can do is pray. And wait.
I'll keep you posted.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
A bit of a roller coaster...
I think I mentioned last week the difficulty in allowing myself to feel all of the emotions involved in my upcoming transition. I realized about a week ago that I didn't have as much excitement, etc, about my upcoming move and wedding as I used to, and that it was because I was trying to numb the feelings of sadness, nervousness, etc, I have about leaving. As much as I don't like the 'negative' feelings, I do want to have the 'positive' ones, as much for the sake of my fiancé as for myself. I didn't want to cheat myself, if that makes sense.
So I started trying to consciously feel more excited, for starters. We've had a high percentage of serious, figure things out type of conversations lately. I know it is pretty normal for engaged couples, but it is also pretty normal for engaged couples to be able to pepper their time with some fun or just together time. Due to the constraints we have being long-distance, we get a total of maybe 4-6 hours to IM each week. When there's a lot of things to figure out, that ends up being the only interaction we have. So this past Saturday, I made a point of trying to have some lighter conversations, to spend some time affirming each other and talking a little about what things will be like once we're together (rather than trying to plan all the stuff that will bring us together). It helped. I started to thaw, to get excited again (I wish I could think of a better word than just excited...)
Well, come Monday, I discovered that I had effectively thawed out. I was innocently driving along, listening to a worship CD. First of all, I realized I was connecting more deeply with the Lord than I have been lately (hard to connect with Him when trying to stay numb). The next thing I know, I'm crying. I had been just affirming in my spirit that I was trusting the Lord to be all I needed in the upcoming transitions, and suddenly the pain and sadness of leaving hit me hard. I spent the last several minutes of the drive to a friend's house allowing myself to feel that (and yet be presentable when I arrived!).
Today's overwhelming emotion has been missing FB. Wishing he wasn't so far. So glad we're chatting tonight. Looking forward to being his wife.
Through it all, the one thing that has been consistent is the peace of God that passes understanding. Ever since this relationship started, I have walked with a deep and pervasive assurance that I am exactly where the Lord wants me and that He will be faithful to provide for my every need. In some ways, I am really looking forward to the difficulty of the upcoming transition because I know it will help me press into the Lord in ways I wouldn't otherwise.
So I started trying to consciously feel more excited, for starters. We've had a high percentage of serious, figure things out type of conversations lately. I know it is pretty normal for engaged couples, but it is also pretty normal for engaged couples to be able to pepper their time with some fun or just together time. Due to the constraints we have being long-distance, we get a total of maybe 4-6 hours to IM each week. When there's a lot of things to figure out, that ends up being the only interaction we have. So this past Saturday, I made a point of trying to have some lighter conversations, to spend some time affirming each other and talking a little about what things will be like once we're together (rather than trying to plan all the stuff that will bring us together). It helped. I started to thaw, to get excited again (I wish I could think of a better word than just excited...)
Well, come Monday, I discovered that I had effectively thawed out. I was innocently driving along, listening to a worship CD. First of all, I realized I was connecting more deeply with the Lord than I have been lately (hard to connect with Him when trying to stay numb). The next thing I know, I'm crying. I had been just affirming in my spirit that I was trusting the Lord to be all I needed in the upcoming transitions, and suddenly the pain and sadness of leaving hit me hard. I spent the last several minutes of the drive to a friend's house allowing myself to feel that (and yet be presentable when I arrived!).
Today's overwhelming emotion has been missing FB. Wishing he wasn't so far. So glad we're chatting tonight. Looking forward to being his wife.
Through it all, the one thing that has been consistent is the peace of God that passes understanding. Ever since this relationship started, I have walked with a deep and pervasive assurance that I am exactly where the Lord wants me and that He will be faithful to provide for my every need. In some ways, I am really looking forward to the difficulty of the upcoming transition because I know it will help me press into the Lord in ways I wouldn't otherwise.
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Assorted Thoughts
I have a couple of things I want to write about. I don't think anything too long. So this post might jump around a bit...
We had our bi-annual family reunion this past Saturday, for the family of my father's mother. As in, my Grandma's siblings and their families. She was one of about 6, and they all had big families. No one manages to keep everyone at this thing straight, especially since most only see each other once every 2 years. This always felt like my Grandma's event for me. I usually introduced myself as her granddaughter and my father's daughter before giving my own name. But Grandma passed away a couple of months after the last one. I wondered what it would be like this year without her. Strangely, the day passed without me giving it much thought. No one mentioned her absence. I hung out mostly with our more immediate clan, touched down with the few distant cousins I've connected with over the years. And then it was over. I feel almost like I've betrayed her by not missing her more that day. I anticipated more emotion more than I actually experienced.
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So, for those readers who pray, I'd appreciate all the prayers I can get. FB really needs to find a good, new job soon. He had a stable, well-paying job for several years. Then, several months back, what appeared to be an even better job presented itself. It was a shorter commute, better work culture, with more opportunity for advancement. After a lot of prayer, he went for it, and for all the right reasons. He wanted to be home with me a little more and be able to provide well. In reality, it turned out to not be a good fit. And since it was almost entirely based on commission, he hardly made anything. So he's searching again. It's rough, with the timing being what it is. The Lord has always been faithful to provide for me though (most of you know I've never made much, but also had very little debt), so I know He has something in store for us now, too. But you know how waiting can be...
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I'm back to trying to find the balance between allowing myself to feel the myriad of emotions that come with preparing both to get married and to move so far away, but at the same time not become overwhelmed with them. I have a tendency to just kind of freeze them up, but everything gets frozen. So I don't have to deal with the sad/nervous/anxious feelings, but I also don't get to have the excited/happy/joyful ones as much. Maybe writing will help - maybe you'll see more on this soon.
We had our bi-annual family reunion this past Saturday, for the family of my father's mother. As in, my Grandma's siblings and their families. She was one of about 6, and they all had big families. No one manages to keep everyone at this thing straight, especially since most only see each other once every 2 years. This always felt like my Grandma's event for me. I usually introduced myself as her granddaughter and my father's daughter before giving my own name. But Grandma passed away a couple of months after the last one. I wondered what it would be like this year without her. Strangely, the day passed without me giving it much thought. No one mentioned her absence. I hung out mostly with our more immediate clan, touched down with the few distant cousins I've connected with over the years. And then it was over. I feel almost like I've betrayed her by not missing her more that day. I anticipated more emotion more than I actually experienced.
---------------------------------------------------
So, for those readers who pray, I'd appreciate all the prayers I can get. FB really needs to find a good, new job soon. He had a stable, well-paying job for several years. Then, several months back, what appeared to be an even better job presented itself. It was a shorter commute, better work culture, with more opportunity for advancement. After a lot of prayer, he went for it, and for all the right reasons. He wanted to be home with me a little more and be able to provide well. In reality, it turned out to not be a good fit. And since it was almost entirely based on commission, he hardly made anything. So he's searching again. It's rough, with the timing being what it is. The Lord has always been faithful to provide for me though (most of you know I've never made much, but also had very little debt), so I know He has something in store for us now, too. But you know how waiting can be...
-------------------------------------------------------
I'm back to trying to find the balance between allowing myself to feel the myriad of emotions that come with preparing both to get married and to move so far away, but at the same time not become overwhelmed with them. I have a tendency to just kind of freeze them up, but everything gets frozen. So I don't have to deal with the sad/nervous/anxious feelings, but I also don't get to have the excited/happy/joyful ones as much. Maybe writing will help - maybe you'll see more on this soon.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Checking in
I haven't been sure what to write, but I often find that writing is the best way to inspire myself, so here goes...
The biggest thing that comes to mind is this: the fact that I am going to move far, far away from here very soon has been hitting me a little more the last few days. I think this is for several reasons.
1) Moving back in with my parents is one of my signals that I am getting close to the end of my time here. It seems like just the other day that this point seemed way off in the future.
2) It just really isn't that far off. Tomorrow is August 1st. I leave in (late) October. That means 2 months from now (plus a little) I will be packing up to leave.
3) My brother and his wife announced to the family this past weekend that they are expecting their first baby. I am very excited for them. I am also sad for myself, as I will not be here when the baby is born, and may very well not meet the baby in his/her first year. Maybe I will, but I have to brace myself for the possibility that I won't since it looks like our money situation could be pretty tight.
4) There are a few things happening that are going to keep the time moving along pretty quickly. For example, a bridal shower is being thrown in my honor at the end of August. When FB comes to visit, my family is throwing a "Rochester reception". And I found out yesterday that I have a full time job until I leave, starting Monday. (The job sounds easy and laid back, pays decently, and has the comfortable hours of 8:30-4:30.)
Ok, that was easy part. The hard part is determining exactly how I feel about all this.
I don't know if I've explained here at all how often I get asked the same questions. One of the very common ones is, "So, are you getting excited yet?" Let me just state for the record that I have been excited for a year now! Of course I am excited - I am finally getting married, to a really, really great guy (may I say, The Perfect Guy)! So yes, the fact that the time for me to leave is quickly approaching does cause excitement for me. I am excited, first of all and obviously, to be near the man I love. I am excited to embark on an adventure, learning a new language and culture, becoming a wife. I am excited to be near and among good friends that I have not so far been able to spend a lot of time with.
I think the next emotion I can identify is that I am nervous. Nervous to embark on a new adventure, learning a new language and culture, becoming a wife. Nervous to try and deepen and broaden relationships with good friends that I have not so far been able to spend a lot of time with. Nervous to leave all my family and friends here. Ok, nervous might not be strong enough for that last statement. Occassionally terrified to leave all my family and friends here. Ok, terrified might be a bit strong, but you get the idea.
Mmm, I think that is the best I can do for the moment on that...
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So, apparently I have simply had good windows for plants and marvolous luck on the watering and feeding. Well, ok, maybe I had a little bit of a clue. But I managed to overheat and shock the plant going to my aunt in the process of moving, and I really haven't the faintest idea on how to revive it. I'm taking my best guess and hoping it is at least still alive when I take it to her on Saturday.
The biggest thing that comes to mind is this: the fact that I am going to move far, far away from here very soon has been hitting me a little more the last few days. I think this is for several reasons.
1) Moving back in with my parents is one of my signals that I am getting close to the end of my time here. It seems like just the other day that this point seemed way off in the future.
2) It just really isn't that far off. Tomorrow is August 1st. I leave in (late) October. That means 2 months from now (plus a little) I will be packing up to leave.
3) My brother and his wife announced to the family this past weekend that they are expecting their first baby. I am very excited for them. I am also sad for myself, as I will not be here when the baby is born, and may very well not meet the baby in his/her first year. Maybe I will, but I have to brace myself for the possibility that I won't since it looks like our money situation could be pretty tight.
4) There are a few things happening that are going to keep the time moving along pretty quickly. For example, a bridal shower is being thrown in my honor at the end of August. When FB comes to visit, my family is throwing a "Rochester reception". And I found out yesterday that I have a full time job until I leave, starting Monday. (The job sounds easy and laid back, pays decently, and has the comfortable hours of 8:30-4:30.)
Ok, that was easy part. The hard part is determining exactly how I feel about all this.
I don't know if I've explained here at all how often I get asked the same questions. One of the very common ones is, "So, are you getting excited yet?" Let me just state for the record that I have been excited for a year now! Of course I am excited - I am finally getting married, to a really, really great guy (may I say, The Perfect Guy)! So yes, the fact that the time for me to leave is quickly approaching does cause excitement for me. I am excited, first of all and obviously, to be near the man I love. I am excited to embark on an adventure, learning a new language and culture, becoming a wife. I am excited to be near and among good friends that I have not so far been able to spend a lot of time with.
I think the next emotion I can identify is that I am nervous. Nervous to embark on a new adventure, learning a new language and culture, becoming a wife. Nervous to try and deepen and broaden relationships with good friends that I have not so far been able to spend a lot of time with. Nervous to leave all my family and friends here. Ok, nervous might not be strong enough for that last statement. Occassionally terrified to leave all my family and friends here. Ok, terrified might be a bit strong, but you get the idea.
Mmm, I think that is the best I can do for the moment on that...
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So, apparently I have simply had good windows for plants and marvolous luck on the watering and feeding. Well, ok, maybe I had a little bit of a clue. But I managed to overheat and shock the plant going to my aunt in the process of moving, and I really haven't the faintest idea on how to revive it. I'm taking my best guess and hoping it is at least still alive when I take it to her on Saturday.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
From Vacation
So, I was just about to write a post about how we've temporarily escaped the perpetually damp campgrounds for a little coffee shop, and how although I am enjoying time with family, the rain and the fact that I missed my date with my love thanks to a power outage are putting a damper on things, when...
...I realized he was online and got to chat with him for about 10 minutes. How that brightened my day! :)
Seriously, over all, I am having fun and relaxing. It is good to be with family, although a harsh reality that it was only for about 16 hours that all of us were here at once - and that wasn't even all of us since one of my brothers and his wife can't make it at all. I was very prepared for a hot, sunny, hang out by the pool or beach kind of vacation, and instead it is a cool, rainy, muggy kind of vacation. But, lots of quality time. I just have to push my PMS emotions out of the way once in a while.
Ok, I should get back to the quality time instead of posting...
...I realized he was online and got to chat with him for about 10 minutes. How that brightened my day! :)
Seriously, over all, I am having fun and relaxing. It is good to be with family, although a harsh reality that it was only for about 16 hours that all of us were here at once - and that wasn't even all of us since one of my brothers and his wife can't make it at all. I was very prepared for a hot, sunny, hang out by the pool or beach kind of vacation, and instead it is a cool, rainy, muggy kind of vacation. But, lots of quality time. I just have to push my PMS emotions out of the way once in a while.
Ok, I should get back to the quality time instead of posting...
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Quality Time
I had a great Memorial Day weekend. My one brother managed to come home from Ireland for the weekend, and another brother came with his wife and kids for the weekend. Only one sibling was missing, visiting with his in-laws. So we all spent lots of great time together Thursday-Monday. I can't remember the last time so many of us so thoroughly enjoyed each others' company. Everyone got along really well, playing assorted games together and chatting, enjoying good food. We even had Gram and Papa there for the day on Saturday. Plus, the weather was perfect. It was good. And I was able to enjoy the moment without getting depressed about similar times I will miss in the future (which has happened at other gatherings over the last several months). I just enjoyed it.
What a contrast to the amount of time I've had with my fiance of late. We chatted online for about 1 1/2 hours last Thursday, and another 1 1/2 hours Monday. And mind you, chatting by IM means typing everything you say, which means each of those consisted of the equivalent of maybe 45-60 minutes of real conversation. We had a couple of business items to attend to, such as preparing for the upcoming visa appointment, which further decreases the 'quality time'. There were a couple of pretty deep issues that came up, and it left me feeling frustrated that our conversations around these issues had to be so short and shallow. I thoroughly appreciate the technology we have to stay in touch, but there are definitely times that it just doesn't cut it.
It's too bad that increasing my quality time with FB means decreasing the family time to almost nill. For those who've known me a while, would you have ever guessed I'd purposefully move so far from home? My one consolation is that his family is similar to mine in many ways, and also enjoys spending time together, so at least I'll have a substitute for what I'll be missing. I'm sure at times that will simply rub in the pain of missing my family, but I know it will also help.
What a contrast to the amount of time I've had with my fiance of late. We chatted online for about 1 1/2 hours last Thursday, and another 1 1/2 hours Monday. And mind you, chatting by IM means typing everything you say, which means each of those consisted of the equivalent of maybe 45-60 minutes of real conversation. We had a couple of business items to attend to, such as preparing for the upcoming visa appointment, which further decreases the 'quality time'. There were a couple of pretty deep issues that came up, and it left me feeling frustrated that our conversations around these issues had to be so short and shallow. I thoroughly appreciate the technology we have to stay in touch, but there are definitely times that it just doesn't cut it.
It's too bad that increasing my quality time with FB means decreasing the family time to almost nill. For those who've known me a while, would you have ever guessed I'd purposefully move so far from home? My one consolation is that his family is similar to mine in many ways, and also enjoys spending time together, so at least I'll have a substitute for what I'll be missing. I'm sure at times that will simply rub in the pain of missing my family, but I know it will also help.
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