Sane Transitions

Sadly neglected, but the name still applies

2011-07-05T22:39:00.003-04:00

So, my apologies to all you faithful readers on how much I have neglected this blog of late. It was not my intention, more a function of difficult internet access compounded by 2 small children. Hopefully, it will no longer be the case.

Why, you may ask? (Well, probably the majority of you are not asking, but there's a few of you out there I still need to catch up.) The answer brings me to the reason the name of this blog still applies (in case any of you had had the same train of thought as I did this past year: that I was past being a newlywed and a newbie in Mexico, and so there wasn't much transition happening anymore...).

Well.....drum roll please.....we have just moved back to Rochester, NY! So, now we have all kinds of new fun transitions.

This is a change we started talking and praying about around a year ago, and it was only this past May that we finally got the visa approved for Herme to be able to live and work here. (He previously had a visa that was only for visiting.) That whole process has been interesting, at times quite frustrating, and I hope to write more about that soon.

We arrived here Wednesday, June 29th (a day earlier than expected, a change we discovered Monday evening). We decided extra baggage fees, altho costly, were cheaper than shipping fees, and came up with 11 checked bags and 6 carry-ons (that was for 3 paid tickets, plus the baby was allowed a diaper bag and stroller). In some ways that seems like a lot of stuff, but in other ways, we really brought only a sampling. We are staying with my parents until we get our feet under us.

For now, just wanted to make sure we were all on the same page, and let you all know that I hope to be writing much more regularly now that I have easy internet access. :)

Pictures!

2011-03-03T18:08:00.005-05:00

I don't have lots of time, so this will be mostly a pictures only post...

But Joshua is now 5 months old and weighs just over 20 lbs!! He is just starting to sit up on his own (for less than a minute, followed toppling over to one side), and has rolled over 2x when propped up on a pillow. He is a very laid back, smiley, happy kind of guy; starting to love watching and interacting with his big sister. He has eaten a little bit a banana a few times - loves it!

Katya is talking up a storm (with a little bit of a preference for Spanish, altho she knows with whom to speak English or Spanish. She loves helping take care of her baby brother!

All about Joshua William

2010-11-04T16:30:00.006-04:00

I am finally online and able to share a bit myself about this sweet little boy who has joined our family :)

The birth was fairly similar to Katya's... woke up in the middle of the night (about 3am) with some pretty intense contractions, was at the hospital by 5am (already 8cm dilated), and gave birth at 6:40. The pushing stage was longer (40min) and significantly painful despite the epidural, but I think that has a lot to do with having stayed in shape with Katya and being on bed rest this time.

Right from the beginning we've noticed that he is a very different personality than his sister. More laid back and relaxed. Katya had serious bouts of crying those first several weeks...Joshua just kind of fusses a bit, whimpers and groans (much less stressful, even if we are up in the night with him). Katya was very active, trying to hold her head up that first week, hated to be swaddled. Joshua enjoyed being swaddled at least at first, and just recently really started working on holding his head up. Katya wanted to nurse 24/7, it was her answer to all of life's problems. Joshua eats, then is done. And if I try to offer before he's ready (for example, to avoid a meltdown in the car), he has no interest. So it should be very interesting to see this little person/personality emerge and watch the differences between him and his sister.

He's been a decent sleeper from the get-go, in terms of newborns. He's slept about 4 hours the first part of the night since our first night home. On good nights, he gives us another 4ish hours after nursing and pooping around 3am. On bad nights, he grunts and groans and fusses for a couple of hours. Plus, we had one week where he caught a cough from his big sister, and no one was sleeping well. But overall, not bad. And the fussiness has been getting better.

Joshua is officially huge. At 3 weeks, he had gained 4 lbs already, which put him at the 95th%ile. (For a little perspective, Katya gained 3lbs in the first month). I'm pretty sure that he weighs somewhere around 13 lbs at this point. He'll be 6 weeks on Saturday.

Katya just loves her little brother, had since day one. She's always kissing him and hugging him, wanting to hold him. She's my big helper, always willing to run and get a diaper or burp cloth, handing me his change of clothes, etc. The first few days she cried if any visitor tried to hold him, saying he belonged to me. She's quick to respond to him, saying loudly, "God bless you!" every time he sneezes, hugging him and apologizing for any and all bumps or knocks, or calling out to him if she hears him fussing, "I'm coming, Joshua!"

Everyone has been really impressed with my quick recovery from birth, but a natural childbirth is nothing compared to major surgery. And after that recovery, and all the bedrest, and just the normal hard to move cuz your pregnant stuff, I've felt great. it is so nice to be able to move around normally, hold Katya, get housework done, etc. And it hasn't been nearly as hard as I imagined getting into some kind of household routine. I haven't had any help other than Herme since my mom left a week after he was born, and sure there are days where I feel like I do more nursing and changing of poopy diapers than anything else, but overall things are getting done. It does help that he is a pretty laid back little guy, and that he doesn't want to be glued to the breast like his big sister did. Plus, compared to not being allowed to do anything around the house, just doing a little bit of the basic stuff done is exciting. Nothing like major surgery and weeks of bed rest to put things in perspective for you!

PS: Sorry some picture go published 2x, not sure what that's about!

Pics of Joshua William

2010-09-26T23:04:00.003-04:00

Hey all, Sheila's brother stepping in, just thought I'd share a couple of pictures of the new and handsome baby boy in the family. Again, baby and mother are doing fine, Grandma (Sheila's mom) went down this morning for the week to help out and reports all is well.

Here's the pictures

September 25 Is BIRTH DAY

2010-09-25T19:49:00.002-04:00

Two years to the day that Katya was born, Joshua William was born. Although two weeks early, he weighed 7 pounds, 5 ounces, and was almost 20 inches long. There were no complications for the mom or baby from earlier events of this pregnancy. My mom will be coming to visit for about a week, and I hope to have pictures up soon.

- Ghost-Written by my family members

We saw OUR Dr today

2010-09-03T16:52:00.003-04:00

The one who walked us through the whole hospital/surgery experience. She was in a pretty serious car accident just after I got out of the hospital, so this was the first time we'd seen her (6 weeks later!).

Lots of good news:)
She is all for a natural birth, feels there is absolutely no need to plan a C-section just due the operation. (There is always the possibility of one based on the circumstances in the moment, but she is pro-normal birth).

She also said I can start getting up a couple of hours at a time, and can do some light housework (cook, do dishes, etc). She told me not to get carried away, and to make sure and rest every couple of hours, but since I will be 35 weeks on Monday, and the baby already weighs 6 pounds, we don't have to try so hard to out and out avoid birth at this point.

She ALSO said that the endometrioses is not far advanced or very serious.

On an interesting note, in explaining the pathology report to us, she said the type of tumor/cyst I had was one that I had had since birth but only recently started growing. Its growth had nothing to do with the pregnancy - that was just bad timing.

She spent an hour with us, thoroughly checking me and the baby, kindly and patiently answering all of our questions. She really wants to stick with us through the birth, even said she would cancel upcoming weekend plans if we called with any issues or labor signs, etc.

I still haven't gained back all the weight I lost after surgery, but the Dr seemed content with my overall weight gain (about 20ish pounds).

Oops, times up. Gotta run:)

We saw the Dr today

2010-08-17T18:26:00.001-04:00

Our old Dr that is, the one who delivered Katya.

Good news is that the baby appears to be healthy and growing (he's gained about a pound in the last 4 weeks), and I appear to be recovering well from surgery and have actually gained back 4 of the 6 or so pounds I had lost in the first week after surgery.

Bad news is that I should continue mostly on bed rest for the foreseeable future (should not pick up Katya, should not do laundry or mop, etc.), and the Dr is recommending a C-section as opposed to a natural birth to avoid the risk of a hernia and the necessary surgery to repair it at the scar site.

He was willing to keep options open until closer to the due date as we get a better feel for the shape I am in and if it looks like a simple or difficult delivery. But since operation to due date is a week or so short of the 90 days they would consider the time needed for the scar to fully heal, he advises avoiding the risks of a normal labor.

In other news, I continue to have less contractions and continue to be weaned off of the anti-contraction medications, both of which are a good thing for the baby.

I think that pretty much covers things for the moment. We will have to continue trying to find daily help for now, so appreciate your prayers on that count.

Filling in the Details

2010-08-10T14:18:00.003-04:00

Mom is great, and I am very grateful for her getting that last post up for me, but we all know that she is not a detail/chatty/blogging kind of person. And today's bed-rest is happening at a friend's house, with internet access :) So I thought I would flesh things out a little for you all.

It's been a little over 2 weeks since the Saturday I started feeling a little uncomfortable in the late afternoon. I didn't think much of it at the time; uncomfortable comes with the territory when you are 3rd trimester pregnant. I thought it was gas or something, and tried to ignore it. It was around 7:30 or 8 when my left side started to hurt. Still thinking it was gas, I took some Tums and tried to change positions so things could calm down in there. By 8:30 I was in some serious pain, changing positions didn't help a thing, and I was beginning to realize that the pain got worse in waves, suspiciously like contractions. I told Herme to call the Dr, and in a matter of minutes we were on the way to her office.

By the time we got there, I was in so much pain that someone found me a wheelchair and they wheeled me in. The Dr was a little shocked by how severe it seemed when she saw me, like we hadn't explained to her just how bad it was. But I told her it hadn't been that bad, it was all happening very quickly and suddenly. She started examining me, quickly concluded that the contractions were not the primary issue, but rather had been provoked by the pain of whatever the real issue was (although obviously they were concerning, nonetheless). She checked the baby with her ultrasound and did a quick internal examine to make sure labor wasn't imminent, and then sent us off to the hospital.

Since we don't even have the government medical insurance right now, she first sent us to a government run hospital that accepts people without insurance. Her husband actually drove us over, because it was obvious that between worrying about me and having Katya still on his hands, Herme probably wasn't in much shape for driving. They ignored me for a good 10 minutes or so after I arrived in the maternity ward (I was sitting in a wheelchair in the hallway), then quickly examined me and apparently only paid attention to the early labor signs. By this time my in-laws had arrived for Katya and Herme made it up to where I was. They told him they could admit me, but that there was a good chance the baby was coming early and they didn't have any incubators free. So back out we went, and my in-laws drove us back over to the good private hospital in town (which happens to be where we started, cuz that's where the Dr's office is).

Our Dr met us at the hospital and now things got moving, much to my relief. Besides being in so much pain (let me just explain that I handled labor without hardly a peep, but many have described me as screaming/crying out in pain throughout this situation), I was frustrated at how long it was taking for someone to do something about the contractions. I was 28 weeks 5 days pregnant, and although I'd been told the baby was quite big for his age, that is still very early for him to be coming out.

They gave me anti-contraction meds and as much pain meds as they could give a pregnant woman, and started trying to figure out what the actual problem was. They were leaning towards kidney stones, but the ultrasound they did that night didn't show them anything. By this time it was after 1am, so they tried to give me enough meds to make me comfortable for the night, told me to get some rest, and we'd start again first thing in the morning.

Without giving a hour by hour play by play, the pain meds only sometimes helped, and then only partially. By 9 or 10 the next morning they weren't helping at all, and off we went for another ultrasound. They searched all up and down my left side without seeing anything useful, then took one x-ray in hopes of getting something that would help them. At this point the pain had moved down, which fit a kidney stone theory, and they saw some evidence on the x-ray that also pointed in that direction. So around noon they gave me an epidural and went up the ureather with a camera. They didn't find an actual stone, but they cleaned out all kinds of sediment and junk, and we all thought that would be the end of it.

But a few hours later the epidural wore off and I was in just as much pain as I ever had been in. Now the Dr started talking about surgery. They didn't actually know that the problem was, but they needed to find out what was causing me so much pain. Being pregnant was complicating things, because they couldn't run the full battery of tests, and those they could do (i.e. ultrasound) were limited by the position of the baby. They got some blood/urine test results back that showed high white blood cell counts, which suggested something being swollen. The surgical consult suggested going in with a camera first to see what they could find, then only opening me if truly necessary. So off I went to the operating room a 2nd time at about 6pm.

They discovered I have endometriosis (something that had been a question almost 15 years ago, but since it can only be diagnosed by surgery or these days with a camera, I never had an official diagnosis), which is the probable cause of the large ovarian cyst they found on the left side. Ovaries are usually the size of a walnut, but this one was now 4.3 in x 3in x 3in and weighed a little over 13oz. They had to open me up and take it out.

I must say that waking up from general anesthesia was one of the weirdest things I have ever experienced, especially since I somehow didn't realize ahead of time that they were going to put me out like that.

Things greatly improved after that...the only real pain being that of recovery from being opened up. However, contractions continued. This was complicated by the fac that I am apparently very sensitive to the anti-contraction medication (heart rate changes, blood pressure drops, etc). Thus the need for bed rest. The contractions seem to be calming down little by little as everything heals up, so at this point 16 days post-surgery, I am starting to hope that bed rest is not going to be necessary the whole rest of the pregnancy. But I obviously have lost a lot of strength and will need to be extra careful for the remainder of the pregnancy, which makes housekeeping and toddler care a bit tricky.

Oh, the cyst was definitely benign, that much we know from the pathology report. But unfortunately, our Dr was in a car accident shortly after the operation, so we have not had the rest of the report explained to us, and have not been able to ask about the extent of endometriosis (all we know is that the remaining ovary is covered in endometrial tissue). Today we found out she won't be back in the office until September. We'll probably head back the Dr that attended us with Katya, so that someone we trust is keeping an eye on things (we only didn't go back to him this time because he is now kind of far from us). Since there is info only the Dr who has been with us can give us, since she saw my insides and all, I don't know if our old Dr will be able to get the scoop for us from the other Dr or if we'll have to go back at some point.

I think that pretty much covers the whole story up till now. Hopefully I didn't get too carried away with this post; I promise I actually left lots of details out. But this post was as much for my good as it was for your reading pleasure :/

I think the one other detail you all might like to know is that the baby has been moving a lot all along, so that's a good sign.

Thank you so much to all who have been praying or have called, etc. It is much appreciated. I'll try to get on again soon after we've seen the Dr.

2010-07-30T15:49:00.003-04:00

this is Sheila's mom. I wanted to let you all know of recent events in sheila's life! July 24 she went into the hospital with pain in her left side and contractions. The short version is she had surgery to remove an ovary! She is home on bedrest now ,recovering from the surgery and trying to avoid premature labor. She would appreciate your prayers and I'll try to keep you updated.

Leaving home, Going home

2010-07-06T22:30:00.001-04:00

So excited to see my husband (70 hours and counting) :)

So hard to say good-bye to my out of town siblings and their families last night :(

Looking forward to reuniting my daughter with her daddy and some of her favorite family members :)

Dreading the last good-byes to the rest of my family, especially knowing that Katya won't understand the permanency of these good-byes :(

There have been so many, what shall I call them?, mental conflicts?
Watching one of those remodeling shows and realizing that the amount of money they spent on the dining room would be enough for us to live on for almost 3 years.
Watching the way some people here use water (turning on the water before even putting the toothpaste on the brush...), knowing my husband barely had enough water to bathe, do laundry, etc.
Watching what people here consider to be 'in need' or on a tight budget, knowing the abundance they actually have in comparison with my situation or that of many I know.
Watching what some girls are comfortable wearing here these days, even to church, coming from a culture of knee length or longer.
Enjoying the comforts and comfort foods of home, yet simultaneously feeling a little out of place and looking forward to the simplicity and honestly healthier lifestyle of home.
Struggling with faith, knowing that it "is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen", and seeing the needs and unknowns of our life. (For example, we've been gifted with more than half of what we need for the birth in a private hospital - hooray! But of course, that means that a little less than half is still needed....My husband has a job, but 100% commissions do not add up to what we need, and no other job has opened up...)

Sorry to say that I am too tired to come up with a good ending to this, but at least I managed to get one more post in before I go, and included at least most of what has been rattling around in my brain of late...

Feeling much better

2010-07-04T22:49:00.003-04:00

First off, I feel like I should clarify a little: when I said that my neighborhood was one of the worst hit, I meant in our city, not anywhere. But I was tired and worried when I wrote that post, so sorry if it sounded worse than it was.

Anyways, I am happy to say that this morning I received a text from Herme saying that everyone was fine, there were just a lot of problems with phone and internet service, and that we would try to connect in the afternoon, which we did! :) The fact that we had planned to not talk for a couple of days due to busy schedules, and then couldn't talk due to the hurricane issues, I was really happy just to hear his voice, without considering my worries and whatnot.

But, apparently, both he and his family, as well as our houses, are all fine despite some serious flooding all around them. Interesting, since our house has a tendency to flood a little bit in just a regular rain storm. As Herme said, God had His hand on the family.

So, feeling much better today. So good to talk to my husband for a bit. So nice to know that there was no damage to our stuff. So good to talk to my husband for a bit :) (I know, I said that 2x, but it was really good)

Thanks for praying.

Hurricane Alex

2010-07-03T23:05:00.001-04:00

I'll update when I know more, but I haven't been able to get a hold of my husband, and from what I can find online, our neighborhood was one of the worst hit by hurricane Alex, one of 6 receiving government assistance for flooding...

Appreciate your prayers...

Feeling a little rusty

2010-06-28T17:55:00.000-04:00

The thing about blogging is that if you are blogging consistently, you almost start to see all of life through the lens of the possible blog post. There are an endless supply of posts. But when you are NOT blogging consistently, it gets harder and harder to put together a good post. With such limited internet access the last year or so, I am definitely feeling rusty. But I can't let a whole month of unlimited internet access go by without posting at all, so here goes...

THE VISIT:
I am a pretty social person. But having relationships of varying degrees in more than one place, with the distance factor complicating things, causes me to literally want to avoid acquaintances. I just don't have the energy for them. I have a limited amount of time to see family and close friends, and that is emotionally draining (not to mention the emotional energy involved in missing my husband and everyone else back home). In large group settings I find myself cringing when I see certain people coming, or just sort of shutting down because I can't figure out who is important enough to invest in. It feels almost like a personality change. Then there are the people who I want to see but somehow we don't seem to connect - I can't always tell if I am just not enough of a priority for them, or...?

And speaking of back home, I have to just comment that it is so strange how your parents house is forever home (at least if they still live in your hometown). I had never even seen this house before this visit, but both in my own mind and in that of many others (strangers and friends alike), I was headed home. But of course, at the same time, Saltillo, my husband, etc...that is home.

And I am missing home. Big time. My husband and I were both of the feeling, when we talked yesterday, that a month may just be too long for solo visits. This has been a bit hard on both of us, and definitely harder on him than he expected. He had encouraged me to take advantage of the opportunity to come up; 4 weeks was his idea. But he is finding that he feels awfully lonely, that he now has double the missing to do (last time I came up alone, I was pregnant with Katya...he didn't miss her yet. Now he misses both of us), that hanging out with his family just isn't the same anymore after 2 1/2 years of living with our little family. And although I am enjoying seeing everyone up here, I miss my husband big time. And although I of course have lots of help from my family with Katya, I am finding it very draining to be the only one responsible for her ... the one to make all discipline decisions, always deal with all nap/bedtime fights, etc.

I must be a bit tired, or missing home right now, because so far this post sounds a bit depressing or negative. I AM truly enjoying all the time with my family, spending time with friends that I miss, seeing people at church, seeing all the GREEN here (Saltillo is pretty much a desert), going up to the lake, etc.

Speaking of the lake, I have to share that Katya just loved it! In Saltillo, a large puddle after a big thunderstorm is about as much water as we ever see, so Katya just kept looking around and saying every 15 seconds, "aqua!". Then she'd tell Gramma, then Papa, then an uncle..."aqua". Topped off with all the passing boats, ducks, and swans, and all and all it was a very exciting experience.

Katya has done great adjusting to being here. Within an hour of arriving, she was checking out the house on her own, interacting with everyone. To varying degrees and on different timelines, she has given everyone in the house names that she can say, let them carry her, etc. She even warms up pretty quickly to each new friend we visit. She's been learning new words almost everyday, most of them in English (strangely, since arriving here she learned 'hola' and 'bien').

I put that label of 'the visit' up there because I have at least one other topic I was going to hit as well, but I am thinking this post has gotten long enough and I will save that for another post in the next couple of days.

Traveling

2010-05-20T17:34:00.002-04:00

Just thought I'd throw up a quick prayer request...

Traveling Thursday, June 10th....about 5 months pregnant, alone with a toddler.

Biggest worries are not losing her in the airports, especially when I have to pick up all my luggage to go thru immigration; and that she doesn't get too antsy on the flights (especially the 3hr flight mid-day).

Thanks :)

Quick pregnancy update

2010-05-06T18:59:00.007-04:00

So, here you can see how the belly was growing last pregnancy.

This pregnancy, I was obviously showing by 2 months, and here is a picture shown today - about 4 months. I've gotten lots of comments about how I appear to be more like 6 months pregnant, and lots of people asking if I'm not having twins or something.

Considering I looked like this by the end of the last pregnancy, and considering that at 4 months I already look like I did around 6months last time, I'm a little nervous about what the last trimester will be like this time.

We did finally go in for a check-up a couple of weeks ago (insurance issues still haven't been resolved, so we shelled out money we didn't really have for a private exam with ultrasound). Thanks to the ultrasound, we are now sure that the larger belly is NOT due to multiple babies. There is only 1 in there. And the Dr seemed pretty sure that it is a boy, but we are trying not to get carried away until we get that confirmed at a later date. Interestingly, although my tummy is quickly growing, I have barely gained any weight - about 3 or 4 pounds in the 1st 14 weeks.

Here are a couple of other pictures for fun - Katya playing with her friend Clara, and one of the three (well, 4) of us.

Ok, I am on borrowed time. Looking forward to seeing lots of you soon :)

Travel dates and other news

2010-04-06T14:19:00.003-04:00

Time is limited because Katya should wake up any minute (at a friend's house, taking advantage of her internet)...

Wanted to at least let you all know that it looks like I will arrive in Rochester around June 10th (in time for my brother's HS graduation) and leave July 9th. I'm a little nervous about being away so long from my husband, and taking my little girl away from her daddy for so long, but excited about seeing everyone back home!!

And for those interested in such things, weaning has gone surprisingly well, steadily moving forward. Sure, I have to put up with a little extra crankiness sometimes, but that's understandable considering the major transition that it is for her and the fact that we are simultaneously getting her to sleep outside of our bed. We're down to a max of 3 feedings in a 24 hr period, and those are on one side only for only about 5 minutes. The other day, she nursed only once all day! Major improvement over the little girl who was nursing both sides every few hours night and day!

Pregnancy...I think all is well. We haven't actually been to a Dr yet...insurance issues with the new job. So, please continue to keep health care and labor options in your prayers.

On the job front, things have started to pick up lately. We are in god shape for the next couple of months. But the thing about 100% commissions is that there are never any guarantees for the future.

Ok, can't wait to see you all!

Big News!

2010-02-20T20:58:00.003-05:00

Yes, I am actually online for the 2nd time in less than 2 months...shocking I know. But I had to share my big news with you all. I am excited to say that after many months of having no idea when I would be up to Rochester again, I can now say that Katya and I will be up sometime around June (give or take a month...plans are still very preliminary). We´ll probably be up for about 3 weeks or so, so hopefully there will be time to see you all :)

Why, you may ask, are we now making plans to visit? Well, because I am pregnant!! Yes, baby number 2 is now on the way, with a due date around October 11th, just 2 weeks after Katya turns 2. I guess my family has a thing about seeing me pregnant :) But anyways, we are very excited (Herme is very excited) and looking forward to meeting the newest member of the family.

I am, of course, in the midst of the fun of 1st trimester - nausea, tiredness, running often to the bathroom already...but doing well. We would greatly appreciate your prayers as we make decisions about Drs and such. The budget is even tighter now that it was last prenancy. I would really love to have a home birth with a midwife, but that is virtually unheard of here. Unless someone knows a good midwife that wants a free place to stay for a few weeks in the fall here in Saltillo ;)

The other big prayer request is for grace in weaning Katya. Until a couple of weeks ago, breastmilk was still her food/drink of choice plus her favorite comforting device. WE´ve come a long way in a short time, but I am trying to balance her needs with mine and the new baby´s.

Anyways, thats my big news. Katya is now crying for me, so I think that´s my cue to finish up. As always, miss you all and will keep doing my best to update things here.

Hello again...

2010-01-28T14:39:00.004-05:00

I am at a friend's house (an American like me!) with internet access, and my busy, curious, attention demanding toddler is sound asleep :)

So, let's see if I can fill you all in a little on my life...

Herme's job got a slow, slow start...bad weather, holidays, train yourself with a handful of manuals...these things do not make finding your own clients very easy. And remember, this job is 100% commissions. But he's got several clients under his belt now, a potential big-paying deal with a company looking to insure 70ish cars, and they are finally giving him the actual training on what it is he is selling (which, by the way, includes a variety of insurance policies, credit cards and loans, and investment opportunities). Keep praying for a steady client base and encouragement (salesmen get lots of no's in-between the yes's).

Katya and I have settled into our new, no-daddy, routine pretty well at this point. The first week or 2 there were a lot of tantrums while Katya missed her dad and adjusted to less attention and less outings. But now she generally has a nice mix of playing on her own and trying to 'help' me in-between looking for my attention. She only takes 2 half hour naps all day though, so I am generally on the go pretty much all day. But it keeps the day moving quickly.

According to my baby development book, 15-18 months (she is 16mo) is generally a time of language explosion, but I've read that children in bilingual families take a little longer to start talking. Katya says Mama (well, usually she says Mamama), Dada, mira (look in Spanish), meh (more or mas), and bo (boots or botas), and she has a couple of "names" for cousins, etc. She obviously wants to talk a lot... she is always 'saying' things to us, and I am really starting to get very curious about what all she is saying. And she has a little repertoire of hand signs she uses (like patting her own chest to ask to nurse, or putting my hand on something to signal what she wants me to do).

She is just a little cutie, and I am not just saying that because I am her mom :) She is one of those kids that everyone wants to say hi to and win her over as a friend. Everyday brings something new she has learned or something to laugh at. This week I have noticed that she knows how to lift up her feet to put one leg at a time in her pants. Yesterday she walked 10 minutes or more with her hands in her pockets. She loves to try on people's sunglasses (she puts them on herself). She cares about what shoes we put on her (thus, learning to say boots, because they have been her favorites lately). She has very politely gives everyone a kiss on the cheek in greeting or good-bye, and loves to give her daddy kisses (I get very few).

She just got her 1st haircut last week, so she is finally no longer sporting the baby mullet (it was a little out of control!) (Pictures are from today's visit, courtesy of my friend's camera - mine is currently broken)

What else? We're getting settled pretty well at the new church. Katya is finally learning to stay in her class, which is awesome for me! We're getting to know people, had one person over a week or 2 ago, looking to invite a family over soon. Learning names, knowing that there are certain people I can count on chatting with, etc. At the same time, maintaining relationships with friends from the old church. It's nice that we live so close to several of those families, and Katya and I can walk over in about 10 min (Katya speed) to visit on the days that seem slow. It was nice, for example, this week when I was a little heavy hearted, to know that I could pop over and ask them to be praying (I still prefer face to face over phone conversations in Spanish).

Speaking of Spanish, I am getting pretty darn fluent these days. I can have a conversation easily with anyone, only occasionally not knowing a word I want or that they say. My grammar is getting there - I know my more complicated verb tenses still need work.

I often have ideas about things I should blog if only given the opportunity, but of course now that I am here, I am all out of ideas. But that was a pretty decent update, don't you think?

My love to all...I miss being better connected to you all...

A JOB!!

2009-11-23T19:07:00.002-05:00

My husband has a job! For the 1st time in almost an entire year, he got a yes!

Now, we still covet your prayers, because it is 100% commissions, no base salary. But a job is still a job, and much, much better than no job at all.

He will be working in a bank, ´selling´ credit cards, insurance plans, etc.

The big upside...he will work normal, 40 hour work weeks, Mon-Fri, and will be at a desk in the office...no crazy driving all over town stuff like the last job. :)

I can´t remember the name of the bank, but its owned by the man who is even richer than Bill Gates and from Mexico...

Today he went in and filled out all the pre-hire paperwork, and tomorrow or Wednesday he´ll start his training or orientation or whatever you want to call it.

THank you so, so much for all of your prayers!!!!

___________________

In other news, because I ran out of time last time, we have switched churches. This has been a major decision for us that we have struggled with since actually before the wedding, about 2 years now. It has been hard, mostly because we really felt like we were with family at our first church. At the new church we knew only a handful of people getting started, although I am happy to say that after 5-6 weeks, I do know a few names and faces now. But we reached a point where we really felt it was where God wanted us, that He has a plan for us and for the family of my husband in that church and under that Pastor´s care. We actually will be meeting with the Pastor in about a half hour. Anyways, for that reason, I can´t write more now, but it has been a major change for us that I wanted to share here, even if it is only a little bit.

Thanks again for all the prayers. I´ll keep doing my best to stay in better touch!

Wow, it´s been a LONG TIME

2009-11-05T15:33:00.006-05:00

I am going to write as much as I can and post as many pictures as I can before Herme and Katya can´t handle waiting for me any more... pictures taken since around early August till the present, and include first birthday celebrations :) (They are in reverse order, and my husband wants it clarified that his pants are only dirty because he had just sat down on a dusty bench....)

Let´s see, where do I start??

Well, still no job. My poor husband has applied for things ´beneath him´, for things recommened by friends, anything within his ability....and no one even wants to interview him (beyond an initial screening anyways), much less hire him. We don´t know what to think. He just keeps looking, keeps applying. The whole state of the economy doesn´t help any - there just aren`t a lot of jobs out there, and there are so many people looking for work.

My parents came to visit for a weekend, just in time to celebrate Katya´s 1st birthday. That was awesome, especially since Mom coming was a complete surprise to me! It was quick, part of a business trip, but we enjoyed every minute of it :) So special to have them here for the birthday party and everything.

Living so far, far enough to make travel expensive and therefore not common, was not a part of how I saw my life, and yet here I am. I am happy here, wouldn´t trade my husband or how this has all come together for anyting, but it is really hard to be so hard from family and friends sometimes. Speaking of which, this lack of internet time has started to wear on me...I feel really out of touch with all my U.S. folks. Sometimes I feel like you all have moved on with your lives without me, if you know what I mean. I know it isn´t really the case, but with communication a little harder of late, thats how it feels. Oh how I´d love to be able to use skype in my house and talk to you all whenever the mood strikes!

What else? CAn´t believe that my baby girl is already a toddler! What a fun age, learning something new everyday, showing off for us. Of course, there´s the tantrums and tired breakdowns and vomiting 9x between the hours of 1:30am and 8am, but it´s all worth it of course :) She started walking at 9 months, got scared by a fall, and didn´t find her confidence to walk alone until 11 months. But then she just took off running! She is always on the move, or at least it often feels like that. She loves to read, together or alone. She loves animals, no fear, says ´ruff!´ every time she hears a dog bark. She´s generally a very happy, smiley, friendly girl, although she is a bit discriminating in who she wants to be friends with, gie kisses to, etc. She knows where her nose is (or mine, or yours), she can tell you she is ´so big!´, she loves it when you applaud her. She likes to play peek-a-boo, palms facing out, elbows sticking out to the sides. She waves to the moon every single time she sees it, even if that means 5 times in 6 minutes :P

Ok, I think my time is up. So good to connect with you all :) I love and miss every one, and will try to figure out how to get online more often.

Coming soon...

2009-09-07T16:06:00.002-04:00

...a real live post with pictures and news and comments...

Have you all given up on me? Internet access has been scarce, but I have lots I want to write. Now that we finished with those classes I was giving at church (which were fairly prep intensive), I am hoping to get online soon and do a real update.

For those who have been praying for us, still no job in sight. Just one closed door after another. Besides praying for a job opening, please pray that we would hear from the Lord if there is something we are supposed to be learning, changing etc. 7 months of closed doors makes one wonder, you know?

Ok, promise to write for real soon, like in the next week-ish.

8 months and growing

2009-06-06T11:56:00.005-04:00

Pictures appear in reverse order...most recent are first. The last/oldest is from early Marchish, but just too cute to leave out (and I thought Carole would enjoy seeing the pjs). The rest are from the last month and a half or so. I tried to include some of our favorite fashion statemtents (pigtails, auntie´s hat, dresses from Gramma, showing off her belly) as well as some of her favorite activities (first time in the walker, loves to be on her feet, eating avocado, cold baths in hot weather, drumming on tupperware). She´s been growing like a weed lately (she fills 12mo and sometimes 18mo clothes already...) - I´ll have to try and take some more pictures to post that show just how big she´s getting. I´m guessing she weighs close to 20 pounds these days, and shé close in hight to babies at church that are 2mo to 1 year older.

The New House

2009-05-25T19:56:00.007-04:00

Wow, it is embarrassing how long it has been sinceI last blogged, and how long it took me to get these pictures posted...sorry! But you know how it is, you don´t want pictures of a dirty house, but remembering to take them when the house is clean...

The house is simple, but feels much more open and is possibly bigger than the other. It is just 3 open rooms, one leading into the other. The first couple of photos are of the bedroom, which is the furthest in. (Oops, they loaded in reverse - read everything from the bottom up...) That is mosquito netting over the bed so we don`t get eaten alive at night :) In the 2nd photo, said netting kind of eats up the view, but you can see the corner of the doorway that leads into the funny little side space we use like a walk in closet/storage area. The skinny wooden door leads into the very small bathroom (even smaller than we had at the other house). The doorway full of light leads out to the side patio area. If you could see thru the netting, that is where the door into the kitchen is. The pictures of the kitchen and living room are fairly self explanatory. You see in the living room the only window in the house, but since the kitchen and the bedroom each have a door, the light andair get in. You can see the benefits of moving when the husband isn´t working- thanks to him, I have shelves installed in the living room and kitchen (that he made - the space was there, but nothing else), curtains installed, the netting over the bed, etc. I also posted a couple photos that show our view out front - lots of TREES (a rare find here). There is also one of the front of the house with our built-in bench, and one of a portion of the patio - we enjoy the neighbor´s palm tree hanging over the wall as well as a flowering vine.

We love the open layout, although my husband sometimes says he looks for a straight line and never finds one :) It was built by the owners themselves, and you can see for example that the floors are not level. We really love the location, all the trees, being able to walk to the church or to visit friends, the 7 minute drive to thein-laws. We are not so fond of the unwelcome visitors of the animal/insect kind, one of which even elicited a mild scream from me. They may do us in and cause us to look for yet another hous, if we can´t work with the owners to close them out better.

Ok, my baby girl has waited long enough for me, thanks to this computer being really really slow. Not that I am complaining, because it is free to me internet access:)

Hoping to post some new baby pictures later this week - stay tuned!

Baby Dedication

2009-04-08T20:35:00.004-04:00

We have video too, but its taking too long to load - maybe next time...

(People who sometimes call me - call me! I haven`t heard from you in over 2 months! Inkling - thanks for your comment and link - we`ve been praying for you!)

5 1/2 Months

2009-03-10T20:33:00.004-04:00

Common comments:
She is so alert! notices everything!
She has so much to say- very chatty! (don`t understand that one...) :)
She is so smiley (especially from the safety of mom's arms)!

Recent advances:
Sitting up unsupported (altho carefully watched for the ocassional loss of balance)
Eating a bit of cereal once a day, starting with a bit of banana, etc
Teeth appear to be coming very soon...

Other news:
Looks like we found a house - very near church and family, cheaper, a little simpler in style but a little bigger as well. pictures forthcoming...

Finding about one job/week to apply for - but haven`t received calls for any interviews, etc.

Our Pastor asked us to take charge of the weekly Thurs service - and I`m doing the teaching! (based on restoring the soul book) - very exciting but lots of prep work with the help of my husband - also exciting is all the healing he`s receiving as we work (altho it means the prep goes even slower/longer).

ok, Katya is trying to help me type, and is generally running out of patience with being here, so we´re off. Sorry posts are so irregular of late....the time has been flying...

snapshots of life since returning

2009-02-17T20:54:00.002-05:00

writing one handed, so sorry about skipping puntuation...

*the peaceful death of a 96 year old man, and the grief of a large family extending to the 4th generation (about 85% of my church is a part of this family). burials here happen within about 24hrs - the grief is quite raw

*visiting an aquaitence, a 32 yr old man who suffered a severe stroke while we were away and is slowly regaining use of his left side. has a diagnosis of being a walking time bomb. surgery that could help would cost 2-3 yrs gross salary. waiting for a miracle.

*something like 15,000 people in our city have lost their jobs recently. tens of thousands more are at risk of losing theirs and are currently only receiving half pay. (our economy has depended heavily on such factories as GM and Chrysler...)

*job hunting....there just isn´t even anything to try applying for...

*enjoying being together 24/7 after a long distance courtship/engagement and a year with 70-80 hour work weeks

*an almost 5mo old baby girl who delights us with her many smiles and all she is learning

*sun :) 60-70 deg highs :)

*visiting with all the friends and family that missed us while we were away

*finally receiving some clarity, insight and direction on a spiritual issue that has hung over us like a cloud for over a year

*yet another level of freedom in an area of bondage

*attempting to explain Rochester weather to people who think anything under 65 is cold and rarely experience anything under 30

Final moments

2009-01-27T15:23:00.002-05:00

Strangely enough, the final moments of our trip.... are a day longer and later than planned. We worked hard to get every last gift and hand-me-down squeezed into the suitcases, made sandwiches to get us thru a long day, got up really early to head for the airport...

and found out that the last leg of our trip doesn't exist today!!

It was the Lord's grace that we found out here and not in Houston - can you imagine if we had made it to Houston, and then they told us? With the baby, and not packed in a way to facilitate such a stop, and without a way to call the family in Saltillo and warn them?!?! It was thanks to the lady who checked us in and my dad that we did find out - the 1st two legs of the trip were a different airline than the last leg, so we had the boarding passes to get started. I was inclined to use our 2.5 hr layover in Houston to worry about the last boarding passes, but the woman behind the counter and my dad both encouraged me that there was time to do it before heading thru security.

So, here we are, one more day. Weird, huh? Good thing we don't have anything pressing awaiting us.

But after a week or so of really not feeling up to leaving and not wanting to leave my family, when it came down to good-byes last night and this morning I was feeling pretty good. The Lord's grace was very apparent in the final moments, and I was ready. (I assume that will be true for the good-byes the 2nd time around too!) :)

We appreciate prayers for the trip home (calm baby, no weather issues despite the forecasted snowstorm), as well as Herme's job search when we get back. Also, we are going to look for a house on the other side of town, closer to my in-laws, church, pastor....and now my closest friend in Saltillo moved to that side of town too.

Time to go

2009-01-24T08:32:00.002-05:00

Katya is getting fussy quickly, but I'm gonna go ahead and try to write this post as fast as I can because I may not get another chance.

We leave early Tuesday morning, and I am not too sure how I feel about that.

Last time I came up, I was more than ready to head back to Saltillo. But my husband was waiting for me there. 2 weeks was a long time to be without him. This time, he is here with me. And we have been here long enough to have really settled in, for me to feel 'home' again here. I have no real excitement or urge to get back this time.

I am sure that once I am there, and in our home, back in our own little routine, that I will settle back in and be ok. But I have a feeling that the good-bye is going to be rough. And that getting back in our own little routine will take a little while (it will be much quieter and a bit lonelier not having several family members around at any given time).

Another factor here - last time I knew it wouldn't be too long before I saw everyone again. My dad had already started talking about bringing us up so everyone could meet the baby. This time, I have absolutely no idea when I will be back or see anyone from here again. I remember that feeling of not knowing how long it would be before I saw family a year ago - it easily brought me to tears on occasion. But I was also pregnant at the time, and therefore a bit more emotional than usual. So we'll see how that goes this time.

Ok, baby is fussing more and more - time to go...

Sorry - it's been waaayyyy too long!!

2009-01-08T15:26:00.004-05:00

Ok, it has been an embarrassingly long time since I last blogged. Sorry about that. It had to do with online access/time, changes in schedule, hands full of baby.... and eventually just being out of the habit of blogging.

So, let's see. Just to quickly get back up to speed...
(BTW, after talking it over with my husband, I'm gonna start using his real name, Herme, here)
Without getting into all the details, we basically are completely broke and provided for at the same time. Herme left his job at the beginning of December and will be looking for a new one when we get back. We had about 10 days together before leaving Saltillo, which was really nice after all the crazy hours he worked over the last year+. Thanks to those of you who have been concerned about the job situation - sorry I have been so bad at replying! Obviously, we appreciate your prayers for a short search and a good find :)
It took some running around, but we were able to get all the passport related paperwork done in time and have finished passports in hand. (We have to travel with 2 passports for Katya, and a passport and a visa (for opposite countries) for Herme and I. Gets a little confusing!)
Katya did great on the flight up - slept and ate at the perfect times, barely made a peep all day, and even arrived awake and smiling to meet her grandpa and the first few aunts and uncles. I could really feel the prayers, between how great she did and how smoothly and quickly the day went despite a delay on our first flight causing us to arrive several hours later than planned. We discovered that I can go through American customs and immigration with Herme on the visitor side, which is nice because then we can go together and help each other juggle carry-ons and baby(s).

Our visit has been really nice, of course! :) I was grateful to see E&J and kids while they were in town visiting, as well and R&J and their new baby. We've seen both of my grandparents and almost all of my aunts and uncles and cousins. For five days in between Christmas and New Years, we had all of my siblings and their spouses and kids in my parents house - all 18 of us! It was really nice to get everyone together, the first time since my wedding. We're working on visiting assorted friends - many wanted to wait till the holidays were over. We stopped in today at my school to say hi to old coworkers. It was funny to see the looks the kids gave me - 1.5-2 years is a long time in the life of a kid to remember a teacher/principal.

Oh, and we have been very blessed by assorted gifts of money and clothes (mostly for the baby), as well as some favorite children's books and a couple of stuffed animals. :)

______________________

On a completely different note, I felt called to do something a while back and have wanted to share it here. I wrote a thank you note to President Bush for all his hard work over the past 8 years. Having been in leadership positions, I know how hard it can be.... although you try to do your best, it isn't always understood or appreciated. Many have written Bush off the last few months, many are pointing fingers and blaming him for a variety of problems. But I felt it important to acknowledge all he has done and invested these past 8 years. If you would like to encourage or thank him as well:
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500
or
comments@whitehouse.gov
or
Check this link for other contact related info.

-------------------

A few baby updates before I sign off...
She weighs about 15 pounds these days, and is about 3 1/2 months old already. We are beginning to feel like we have a decent routine coming together, although the travel and lots of people keep us from quite nailing it down. The last couple of weeks she has really 'come to life' - everyone always talks about the difference after hitting 3 months. It seemed all of a sudden that toys that barely caught her attention a short time ago, she now tries to grab at and can entertain herself for some time. She started rolling over 2 or 3 days ago (stomach to back), and not only smiles alot these days, but laughs alot too! She is really a very happy and easy to care for little girl, and everyone has been telling us how beautiful she is (so it's not just her proud parents that think so)! Oh, and she got her ears pierced just before we came up.

Well, I'll try not to wait around so long before the next post ;)

A Quickie

2008-11-27T20:54:00.002-05:00

I haven{t been online much lately, and have apparently poorly chosen the times I´ve been on (hard to predict a 2mo old sometimes), so I feel way behind on blogging...and currently have only a few minutes and only one hand.

But I wanted to let everyone know that all 3 of us will be in Rochester 6 weeks, 12/17-1/27. Should be able to many of those I missed last trip up. :)
(Out of towners making any Rochester trips in that time frame???)

Ok, baby is done so so am I.

Pictures!

2008-11-10T20:57:00.002-05:00

The green outfit was for her passport pictures.
The one with me is at the US Embassy, just after being officially registered as a US citizen!

The others were just too cute not to share. The one in the brown dress is from just a day or 2 ago.

About a week ago she started smiling and cooing when she sees me )

Quick bullet points

2008-10-28T20:34:00.002-04:00

- The baby and I both had check-ups today. I weigh 11 pounds less than my first prenantal appointment :) and she has gained about 3 pounds in her 1st month of life (she`s at 10 pounds already!). We are both healthy and good in all other aspects.

-Please pray for us in the coming days as my husband was informed near the beginning of the month that if his numbers didn`t go up this month he would be let go. We haven`t heard anythng else since (like how his numbers are, etc), but have no indication that things are any better.

-One week from today we head to the nearest embassy to register the baby as a US citizen. (Please pray we don`t get lost, no complications, etc.)

-A week ago I sent in my presidential vote! (Here`s hoping the unreliable Mexican postal system gets it to the States in time!) A good friend just got cable, which includes CNN (in English) - I`ll be at her house on election night checking in :)

I am still here...

2008-10-23T20:35:00.002-04:00

...just need to figure out how to hold a baby and type at the same time :) One handed is realllyyy slooooowww!
I finally bought material to use like a Moby Wrap, so maybe that will help.

I wanted to post a few pictures, then realized I am on that ancient computer sans USB port again. But she is 4 weeks old today and already so much bigger! That could possibly be connected to the never ending nursing we seem to be doing, even right this minute :) She loves to hold her head up (she started when she was only a few days old, and now can hold it up pretty steadily for extended periods already), recognizes me on sight, and is tracking us with her eyes. Everyone always comments on how alert she is. I have a tendency to hold her a lot (I don´t always, but a lot)... but I waited a long time for this sweet little girl and figure in 1 or 5 or 10 years I probably won´t look back and wish I did more housework and held her less.

I feel a little like it was forever ago now, but I still would like to share some about the birth and hospital and what not from my perspective.

I had gone to the Drs Tuesday am, and was 0 cm dilated. He was talking induction if I didn´t go into labor within a week. I started soon after having contractions of varying strengths and intervals. With 0 cm on the brain and hoping to go naturally, I made a point of walking little laps the rest of the day. We made sure everything was ready to go to the hospital that afternoon. Wednesday I again had inconsistent contractions. Weather was yucky, so I walked in the house and up and down the stairs. I´d had other days with contractions lasting a few hours and then disappearing, so I wasn´t reading too much into things. They were only rarely of an intensity to make me actually uncomfortable.

We got to bed around midnight Wednesday. At 1am I got up and headed for the bathroom. I mean, thats what I´d been doing every other time I woke up for the last nine months. It took me a minute or 2 to realize I hadn´t woken because I needed to pee, but because of a contraction. They started out every 7-8 minutes. They shortly were coming every 6, and I asked my husband to start timing how long they were...65-75secs. By 2:30, they were every 5min, and we called the Dr. He, thinking 1st labor, told us to hang tight and call back when we saw blood. By 3:30 they were every 3 min and lasting more like 90 secs. I convinced my husband that the Dr wasn´t expecting things to move so fast and to call even though there was no sign of blood. The Dr wisely :) agreed to meet us at the hospital. We arrived around 4am.

I had gotten the distinct impression that epidurals weren´t done here, and didn´t think I wanted one anyways. But when the Dr started talking induction, he mentioned the possibility of an epidural. And I got to tell you that around 3am, I started changing my mind about having one. I know it was great that my labor moved along so fast, but it was intense! I was going from nothing (remember 0cm?) to pushing in a few short hours. When the Dr came in to examine me, I felt better hearing him say something about what strong and fast contractions I was having (so it wasn´t just in my head). They never actually asked me, they just went ahead and worked on getting me that epidural. I think it happened around 5ish or just before, and it was a wonderful feeling :)

I was just thinking maybe I felt the urge to push when they realized I wasn´t feeling much and should cue me in. I started pushing at 5:15, and my baby girl was born at 5:30.

My husband was at my side every step of the way, and was a wonderful support. I don´t totally understand how his presence made such a difference, but it did make things so much better when he was with me for a contraction. I don´t know how I would have made it thru the entry procedures, during the strongest/longest contractions, without him there. And it was obviously absolutely wonderful to share the moment of our daughter´s birth with him. He still talks about it. A million thank yous to the person who made it possible for him to be with me.

Some of the words that describe our hospital experience...
beautiful
quiet
friendly
good service
good food
comfortable

Everyone who came to visit us was impressed. And I got a few comments about how much better this type of experience was than being in a room with 15-20 other woman giving birth (can you imagine??!! and without a husband at your side!?!)

Oops, out of time. Writing one handed takes ages :)

Hope to be back on soon!

What up Gs

2008-10-12T15:24:00.001-04:00

Here's some more pictures.

Pictures

2008-09-28T19:36:00.003-04:00

We just couldn`t wait to share - I`m here in the cyber for about 5 minutes :) Enjoy!

Oh, and offical measurements are 3Kilos 270grams and 51 cm. I`ll let you all do the conversions.

ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!

2008-09-25T11:51:00.002-04:00

GUESS WHAT EVERYBODY

This is Mary, Sheila's sister. Hi, how's everyone doin? Good. Good.

Now I'm sure you realize the only reason that someone other than Sheila would be posting on her blog is because she's a little busy WITH A NEWBORN BABY GIRL!!!!

She called at 4am today to say she was having contractions 3 minutes apart and they were on their way out the door to the hospital. She told my mom "I gotta go, here comes another contraction" My mom said Yep, that's real labor.

Next we heard from her was around 8:30 this morning. She had a short "easy" (I mean labor is labor, but relatively speaking, you know) 4 1/2 hour labor with about 15 minutes of pushing. (For the record my labor was like 14hrs w 2 1/2 HOURS of pushing. Not that I'm not happy for her. But she didn't have to show off like that. I'm just saying.)

Now for the important stuff.

Keep in mind we are depending on a brand-spanking-new mother for these details (which include kilo to pound weight conversion) so they may be edited later, but:

Katya Alana
born 5:30am (ish, and I don't know what time zone that is)
7lbs 1oz.

Sorry, no length (I told you, new mommy details). "FB" claims Katya looks like Sheila (those determined Carpenter genes) but Sheila hadn't seen enough of the baby to give her expert opinion on the matter.

My mom's going to meet the baby tomorrow or Saturday and I'm sending my camera so I tentatively promise pictures in a week or 2.

Happy birthday to Danny and Samuel, Danny always gets the best birthday presents....

Hasta la vista. Bay-bay.

A Voting Link

2008-09-24T20:55:00.002-04:00

I´ve seen some varying thoughts on others´ blogs about how they might vote in the upcoming election. But it was this post that made the biggest impression on me. I also found the John Piper link in the post interesting.

Thoughts?

A collection of thoughts

2008-09-23T21:15:00.004-04:00

So, I am currently listening to the drumming of a ritualistic dance/celebration for an idol that is taking place in front of the Catholic church a couple of buildings away from me. The dancers are dressed in traditional, indigenous outfits, very bright. Interesting, huh?

__________________________________________

In other news, we were back to the Dr´s this morning. Things looked pretty good, with me dropping a pound and the baby apparently gaining a little over a pound (estimated weight: 7lbs 11oz - which is actually my birth weight). The Dr did another internal exam, and it sounds like I hadn´t dilated at all at that point. When all was said and done, he announced that he´d like to induce next week (Wednesday, Oct 1st) if I haven´t already gone into labor. Something to do with the rate at which the placenta is ageing. I am not necessarily a huge induction fan, but considering the many levels at which I am out of my element right now (country, language, first baby....), I don´t really feel up to disagreeing with his strong personality and opinions. I am just happy he´s talking induction rather than C-section, and actually said he thinks I´m a better candidate for a normal labor than for surgery.

Both my husband and I are hoping and praying for labor to start on it´s own before next Wednesday - and in fact, it may have already. I have been having contractions at varying levels of strength and varying intervals all day. Actually, I had come last night, too. So we´ll see what happens. Obviously, any and all prayers are appreciated at this point!

One way or another, my little girl will be here in the next week. The thing that is funny to me about that is that those ticker countdowns I put on the blog just might be right on :)

___________________________________

My 3rd and final shower was Saturday. Actually, I feel like I had 2 showers on Saturday, because that morning a package arrived from a very good friend who appears to have had fun shopping for us :) But the official one was thrown by my in-laws, who made me feel very loved by all the thought, planning, work, and money that went into making it something special. Several guests we thought were for sure never showed (including, for example, a cousin) - that was the only downer. I received a variety of really nice gifts, ranging from very practical (diapers, medicine dropper, nose suction cleaner thing), to fun (hairbands!), to special (handmade by the giver sweaters), to cozy (fleece baby blankets), to possible winner of best gift (a hardcover/pages children´s bilingual Bible!).

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Don´t know how many of you have followed the AIG bank woes, but that is the parent company that my husband is working for. He already was feeling enough pressure of late to feel his job is at risk. We´re obviously feeling that pressure even more now. Still waiting to see what God has in store on the job front, and hoping it is something new and better just around the corner...

Baby Update and More Pictures (not of me...)

2008-09-11T19:58:00.007-04:00

So, had another Dr´s appointment Thursday morning. I actually gained 2lbs in the last 2 weeks. Still trying to figure that one out, as I think I did everything the same as always, and last appointment I had lost weight. Basically, I´m saying I don´t get how weight works when you are pregnant :)

Considering that at our last appointment, my little daughter had put on 2lbs in 3 weeks and totaled 5lbs 12oz (by ultrasound estimates, over a month before the due date), you can imagine that I was a wee bit nervous about her growth rate quickly putting her into the huge category. But this time she appears to have only gained 13oz in 2 weeks, putting her at an estimated total of 6lb 9oz. That´s not so bad. Of course, she could be in there for another month or so...

Everything the Dr checked looked good, healthy, normal. Amniotic fluid, placenta, baby´s heart rate, my blood pressure, etc.

He also did an internal exam. Now, Americans most likely read that and figure I got a run down on things like centimeters dilated and percentage of effacement. I did not get any of that information. I did get comments like, ¨this is a very good pelvis¨ and ¨the cervix is smooth, which is to say it should open easily¨.

I´m not sure if I have mentioned here how they seem to be much more C-section prone here in Mexico. As in, if there is anything out of the ordinary, they opt for the C-section rather than work with it. So at today´s appointment, everything the Dr checked, it was like he was looking for something out of the ordinary that would warrant scheduling surgery. Thanks be to God, he didn´t find anything. And told us he feels about 95% sure that I am headed for a normal delivery. Considering how surgery-happy they seem to be here, I am very happy to have been given that high of a chance to let things happen naturally.

Assuming I don´t go into delivery before then, the next appointment is in 10 days. The Dr seems to think I´ll make it that long, although I am not really sure how well a Dr can predict anything at this stage of the game. In the meantime, I am trying not to overanalyze every little change or oddity I feel in my body. I am not desparately waiting for labor to start in the sense that I can´t stand being pregnant any more (I´ve actually heard myself tell a couple of people that I feel great, if you can imagine saying that at 8.5 months pregnant). But I don´t like the unknown of it, the waiting game - and in that sense, I´m hoping for sooner rather than later.

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On to pictures. I promised Carole I´d try to get these up pre-labor, so here we go. The first picture is a typical view you might happen upon here, and the 2nd is the view from my in-laws house. In the 2nd you can see how we´ve had an unusual amount of rain the last month or so - it isn´t usually so green.

These next couple are the views from my house. As I am sure you can imagine, I am looking foward to the day that the construction is done, and keep (maybe foolishly) hoping that they are going to do something with that triangle of dirt in front of my house. But the mountains are forever beautiful, regardless.

And finally, here are a few pics of my house. The first shows it from the outside - the right-hand half is us. They like to build rows of houses or at least build a couple attached at a time. Then you see my living room and kitchen (the view of one is taken from the other and vice-versa) - which is what you see the second you walk in the front door. The front door, by the way, is the one by the stairs and living room furniture. The door in the kitchen opens to our walled in alley/patio like space where my laundry is. I included one of the kitchen that shows off my ´cabinets´. Houses here don´t come with built in cabinetry - everyone has to come up with their own solution. My is on wheels. What doesn´t fit in there is on a table by/under the stairs.

I was gonna post a few others, but the computer I am on today apparently is quite old, as it does not have a USB port. Maybe next time. But I figured better to post something than nothing.

Just to fill out your sense of the house...The stairs lead up to our bedroom and a 2nd bath. That´s all there is up there. We also have 2 more rooms (meant to be bedrooms) on the 1st floor - one in front and one in back. All 3 bedrooms are pretty small, as you´ll see when I get a chance to post a few more pics. I also have a couple of new ones that I took of the view of the mountains from my house when the lighting was better.

Oh, and to clarify - I keep using the phrase ´my house´- but we rent it.

Can you tell I´m trying to catch up on things I´ve wanted to post before the baby comes? I have no clue what kind of cyber time I will be able to finagle with a newborn! It really will depend alot on her personality and sleeping/feeding routines (since cybers are only open certain times of day...).

My stomach is getting bigger and bigger...

2008-09-09T21:04:00.004-04:00

Just in case you thought, considering that I have not been gaining a lot of weight, that my stomach is not getting bigger, I figured I had better post a few more pictures. The first 2 are from about 7.5 months, the 2nd two are from today (I am exactly 37 weeks today...officially full term).

On another note, the showers went well this past weekend. Satuday's was small, I think about 8 people. Unfortunately, I did not get to meet any Americans after all. It turns out that 2-3 Americans are actually 2-3 forgeiners. I did get to meet one of them - from Brazil. Then one, who is actually American, wasn't able to come because of a sick child (with some strange viral thing she didn't want to risk passing to me). I'm still unclear on if there is another American. But regardless, they were all very nice and fun and generous. And by generous, I mean they gave out of the little they have.

Sunday's was also fun, a good time of fellowship with the women of the church - who still aren't really sure I can understand them. I had to reassure them several times that I understood just about everything anyone said. But there was a lot of laughing and generally a good time had by all. And they also were generous in the same sense.

In overview, I was given a number of outfits, although unfortunately close to half of them are newborn size and won't fit this growing girl long, I am afraid. I also received several blankets, some bottles (more than I feel like I will use, but oh well), diapers, wipes, baby soap and oil, and baby cologne.

The last shower isn't till a week from Saturday, being given by my in-laws.

And now, I will leave you with this incredible piece of trivia...

Historically, the woman on record as having had the most children was Russian. Between the years 1725 and 1765, she was pregnant 27 times and had 69 children!!!

Thank you`s, FYI, and Showers

2008-09-05T20:57:00.003-04:00

Wanted to make sure I thanked all of you who
a) have been commenting all along :) and
b) recently came out of the woodwork :)

I feel much better about the whole `void` thing, and remotivated to post regularly. Plus, it was so good to hear from a couple of people I hadn`t in a while.

I`m pretty sure there are still more of you out there who check in and never say anything - would love to hear from you too!!

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After one of my girlfriends `threatened` to start calling me every 2-3 days to make sure she knew when I give birth, I realized I should clue you all in to my plan to have someone (prolly my sister) post here on the blog for me (an most likely on Facebook, too) when the baby is born with the essential details. I have too many friends spread out all over to come up with any better way of making sure you all hear the happy news.

And we do have a hospital - I can`t remember if I have officially said that here. It is a small, private hospital that opened in 2000. My husband is allowed in with me for the delivery, as well as to spend the night in my private room (he gets a very nice leather couch...). It is clean, close to home, and a reasonable price (as far as private hospitals go...).

The Dr I have been seeing all along for prenatal care will be my attending physician for the birth, so there will be a familiar face, and he will be familiar with my history, etc.

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The first of 3 baby showers is tomorrow (Saturday), and another is on Sunday. Tomorrow`s shower, the first, was actually the last to be planned, and was a bit unexpected. It will be largely attended by people I have never met before - a testament to the culture here understanding the need to help others out, as well as never turning down a chance to socialize. The fun part is there will be 2-3 other American women that I have never met there - it should be interesting and helpful to connect to others like me.

Sunday`s shower is being put on by the women at church and will be help immediately following the service.

I`m looking foward to the chance to hang out with all these ladies, as well as begin to wrap my brain around what I do/don`t have and/or need. Our budget is simply too tight to have spent any money on anything until seeing what we are given.

Another neat note of divine provision...
One day last week I took inventory of what clothing I have been given so far. It isn`t much. I spent the next day or 2 trying NOT to wonder how on earth we will ever affort buying clothes for our little girl. On Saturday, one of my good friends informed me that her mother-in-law, who barely knows me (I remember interacting at my friend`s wedding...?), was probably sending me a box or so of baby clothes - many like new or with the tags still on. Even if the box never shows, it was a great reminder of how God can use very unexpected sources to provide for us.

Baby Update

2008-08-27T21:01:00.003-04:00

So, we got to see our little daughter again yesterday. Actually, she is not so little anymore...she put on almost 2 lbs in the last 3 weeks according to the ultrasound estimate, and weighs close to 6lbs already...5 weeks before the due date.

While she was busily gaining weight, I actually lost a pound. Weird,huh? But the Dr isn't worried, and the baby is growing, so all is well I suppose. Puts me at a total weight change of only about 15 pounds.

We had another analysis done for this appointment, and the indicator that was there last time for preenclampsia is now reading normal, so that was happy news. And my blood pressure continues to stay nice and low.

The Dr checked things like amount of amniotic fluid and how the placenta looks, as well as location of the umbilical cord, and everything looks good.

The two fun parts of the ultrasound....
The Dr showing us the baby's hair!
Simultaneously seeing and feeling that she had the hiccups!

The Dr said he had planned on doing an internal exam this time, but since everything seemed so good and normal and all, he decided to hold off till the next appointment in just over 2 weeks.

We've arrived at the weird neverland of pregnancy, where labor could begin any time really [and the Dr said if it started as early as a week from now, we would just let it take it's course], or might not happen for a good 6 weeks or so if she comes late.

But since she appears to be healthy and happy, we'll just continue on our merry way until she decides to come. Although, hopefully, she won't wait so long that she has time to grow too much more!

Mountains, a few pregnancy thoughts, and ¨The Void¨

2008-08-25T20:36:00.002-04:00

In response to Inkling´s comment about that last picture, that was taken about 30min - 1hour from where we live. We live in a very mountainous area, but our city is generally considered to pretty desert like. It isn´t quite a true desert, because there are trees and flowers and bushes that grow here. But they tend to never get very big, and for example there is never any grass unless someone goes out of their way to plant and nuture it. The area in that picture, although relatively close, gets a lot more rain than we do for reasons I do not understand -and so is always infinitely greener and prettier, making for a good picnic/day-trip detination. Not that our city isn´t pretty in it´s own right. You just have to get used to seeing a lot of bare dirt and shades of brown. One day soon, I´ll see if I can post a couple of pictures to help explain what I mean.

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I keep forgetting to mention how much I am really enjoying doing pregnancy pilates, and in particular how much I like this book. I´ve long been a Pilates fan, since several years back when I was losing a significant chunck of weight. And doing them now helps me feel like I have a little bit of control over a body that I generally feel is out of my control these days, as well as helping to feel like my body is the way it should be, for lack of a better description. Like things are lined up and connected as they should be despite all the weird muscle and joint things that happen when you are pregnant.

Speaking of my body being the way it should be...
My sister reminded me that my body still won´t be my own as long as I am nursing, but I am looking forward to feeling like it is a little more predictable. I am particularly looking foward to being able to do things like get out of the car or roll over in bed without making a production of it. :) I am honestly not overly uncomfortable (I did not say I am not uncomfortable, just not overly so), but am beginnging to look forward to having a non-pregnant body for a while.

On another note, I have been reading through the prophets the last couple of months for my daily devotions (and finding them much more interesting than I ever remember finding them in the past- having a study Bible helps I think.). But I am beginning to wonder if my timing was a little off in choosing to read them - there are way too many times when they refer to a woman in labor to make a point about the terrible things that are coming (the pain will be like a woman in labor, they will scream like a woman in labor, etc). Not very reassuring to someone about to go through labor for the first time!

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And now for ¨The Void¨.

Let me start by saying thank you to those of you who reply to my blog in one way or another.

As for the rest of you...

I am beginning to feel like I am writing into the void of nothingness. Sitemeter tells me that there are people coming to read my blog, and it isn´t just Otrgirl and Inkling checking in over and over. (For those of you who are unfamiliar with Sitemeter, it gives me very general statistics about who comes to my blog. Don´t worry - I get no personal information out of it.) But despite an average of 10 people checking in per day, I get very little feedback from you all.

I wanted the blog to be a communication tool, a jumping off point to staying in touch with a variety of people. It helps me maximize my online time by letting all of you know what is up with me at the same time. But beyond that, I was hoping some of you would have some response to what I write, and maybe clue me in on your life.

I have had a couple different people tell me now that they feel funny leaving comments on the blog, knowing that the ´general public´ could potentially read them. If that is the case, send me an email, using what I posted as your jumping off point.

Ok, I don´t want to drag this out or sound like I am complaining. I just feel a little demotivated sometimes to make the effort to post since I am getting so little feedback. And more than that, there are several of you that I am pretty sure read my blog that I would really love to hear from sometimes - I miss you!

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Tomorrow we have another Dr´s appointment, so there should be a new baby update in the next day or 2. I can hardly believe I am down to the last month or so. My overwhelming emotion is a desire to know my daughter, and to see that she is healthy and well. I am getting a little nervous sometimes - feel free to pray that I will be ready in every way for what is to come, and will have a labor free of any major problems.

Pictures!

2008-08-15T20:30:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I am finally posting pictures! :)
Thanks to my sister, I now have a memory card reader, which makes the whole process quite simple. It is just a bit time consuming, at least at this cyber.

This round is of me pregnant, for those who haven´t seen me at all. I´m afraid we started out really well and have of late slacked off a bit, but I promise to get some end of pregnancy ones taken and posted as well.

We started out with the grand idea of taking pictures every month of me in the same outfit, so you could see the differences. It was a good plan, anyways.

Blogger is being a little weird, and no matter what I do, the captions don´t quite fall in the right place, so...for months 3,4, and 5 - there are 2 pictures each, and they are in order. Hope that makes sense.

Here I am at 3 months:

At 4 months:

At 5 months (sorry these came out a bit dark...):

Here, I obviously am not in the same outfit, but soemthing is better than nothing. This was just taken about 2 weeks ago (when we actually had a real weekend!), and I´m right about at 7 months.

The day to day stuff, and the extraordinary

2008-08-12T21:04:00.004-04:00

So, we made it through the month of July. It was pretty crazy, especially since we were without the car for 2 weeks, but we survived. They gave everyone an entire weekend off (Saturday AND Sunday) at the very beginning of August. That was awesome, and there was a noticable lift in my beloved´s mood the following week. They finally told him at the end of last week the new expectations - they don´t have to keep working every Sunday (although I am guessing they will work the last one of the month like they used to), but they have to work full instead of half days from now on every Saturday. And a full day will continue to be 35 instead of 28 visits. They are still ´considering´ giving a little more gas money (which seems like it should be a given since they are doing the equivalent of almost 2 full extra days, based on the old number, of visits per week); there is no extra pay.

Over the last month or so, my husband has managed to go to a few interviews based on what he found the day we went to the circus. But nothing has come together.

I am almost half way through my 3rd trimester, and am definitely feeling it, although I am doing pretty well overall. I just need to say that 2nd trimester is heavenly and by far the best part of being pregnant. Of course, since I felt so energetic and almost normal, it flew right by me. Third trimester came along, and I started feeling suddenly more awkward, slower, bigger. I tire easier, and retain water more/more often. I am up going to the bathroom a lot again, although some nights are better than others. There are also nights I just can´t get comfortable. I get really excited about the nights I get to sleep 3 hours straight. As my husband said this morning, the good thing is I almost always fall asleep again very quickly. Several weeks back I started noticing Braxton-Hicks contractions. At that point they were completely painless, just sort of odd feeling. The last week or 2 they have a definite crampy feeling to them, a mild kind of pain. It finally occured to me the other day to start praticing now relaxing through a contraction instead of tensing up.

I haven´t done any major nesting kind of things, but I am slightly anxious about the fact that we are getting nowhere on choosing a name. And I would like to see the crib put together soon. I was told on Sunday about 2 different baby showers they are planning for me here - one through church, and one by my in-laws. Culturally here, they think you shouldn´t have the shower until the last 6 weeks of the pregnancy, so one is the first Sunday in September (the 7th), the other the 3rd Saturday(the 20th). I´m due at the very end of September or beginning of October, so here´s hoping the baby doesn´t come too early ;)

Today I finished reading a novel about Esther - completely in Spanish. I am feeling pretty good about that. I read a bit slower in Spanish, but not extremely so. I didn´t understand every single word, but I only used the dictionary maybe a dozen times through the whole book. I wrote a birthday card to my beloved the other day (he turned 30 on Saturday), and he told me he sees a huge improvement in my Spanish (I´ve been writing to him since early on in our relationship, always in Spanish). He said he would think another 2-3 months and I will be quite fluent.

Ok, now for the extraordinary. You may remember that we have been trying to figure out a good option for the birth, and I asked for prayer along those lines. Well, although we tried to pursue things with the midwife we had found, she appears to have dropped off the face of the earth. So we decided to start looking around at private hospitals, knowing we most likely did not have the money, to see what kinds of options there were. I believe it was 2 weeks ago today that we managed to squeeze in our first 2 hospital visits. We were suitably impressed. Clean, bright, private rooms, more modern ideas (one offers water births, the other offers to videotape the birth for you). Both seemed relatively quiet and no where near full, leaving me feeling like I would get much better care than what I have heard is the norm in the overcrowded government run hospitals. Both allow my husband to be in the room with me. And both charge much more than we have.

The VERY NEXT DAY - we received news of the provision of a large sum of money towards helping us pay for a private hospital! From a completely anonymous and unexpected source. And it is EXACTLY the amount we need to make it happen! God is so faithful to provide!

We still haven´t chosen exactly which hospital. We visited a 3rd last week that we liked even more than the other 2. And we have one more that has been recommended to us to check out. But we have good options, and the ability to pay for it.

Even better, any of these hospitals would allow the Dr who has been providing my prenatal care to be the attending physician at the birth, and it doesn´t really change the prices at all as he charges more or less the same as we would pay to have a stranger from the hospital be the attending. So it looks like I will actually have someone I know and who knows me and about my pregnancy attend the birth. That is relatively unheard of here, and something I had long ago given up hoping for.

And I´ll end on that happy note :) I´ll give more info once we make our final decision on the hospital.

Baby Update

2008-08-09T20:53:00.002-04:00

I keep having grandplans of writing major posts, or getting some pictures up, but cyber time has been short lately, for a variety of reasons. So I figured I would at least get you a baby update. Please excuse any typos, as I am writing this in under 5minutes :)

We went this past Tuesday for my latest check-up. I am just over 7 months pregnant (can you believe how fast the months go by?!). It was the first time the Dr didn´t tell us taht everything was fine and dandy, which was alittle bit of a downer. You see, I had blood and urine analysises, and they came back showing a few things a bit off. Like being slightly anemic, needing to drink even more water than I already do, and one indicator of the possibility of preenclampsia. But since my blood pressure is still quite low, he isn´t too worried about it yet. So nothing major, butI have to be a little more careful with diet and things.

Speaking of diet, I only gained 2 lbs this time, putting me at a total of 16.5 gained.

The baby is doing just great though. Still affirmed it is a girl, so looks pretty positive on that front. She is already in the head down position and everything looks good. She weighs something like 4 lbs already!

Oops, times up! be back soon!

The Circus

2008-07-21T20:14:00.003-04:00

So, I could go on and on about the frustrations of the last couple of weeks, the job situation, the major (read: expensive and time consuming) car repair.....how my poor husband was exhausted after only a week of this crazy new schedule, managed to complete his 35 visits 4out of 6 days - and yet was reamed out by his boss for not getting them done evryday and told he comes across like he doesn´t want to work hard. How now they want them to also include making visits between the hours of 6-11PM in hopes of finding more people at home.

But I am tired of thinking about it and feel like I´m very complainy of spirit lately.

So I am going to tell you about the circus instead.

The day the car broke down, my beloved chose not to work the rest of the day (it was broiling hot out and the idea of visiting clients by foot....). Instead, he spent a couple of hours job hunting, came home to eat, we got a few errands done....and then we went to the circus.

By the way, although he did find a couple of good leads on jobs that day, nothing has come through so far.

So, the circus. It set up in the next neighborhood over from ours, in an empty lot about the size of a gas station or corner store lot. If you bought your ticket ahead of time from the guy driving around the area with a loudspeaker, it was halfprice at only about $1.50 (American)/ticket. It seemed like a good chance to relax a little and enjoy some cheap entertainment. And it was within walking distance (a key point when carless) :)

We walked thru the entryway, handed over our tickets, and I suddenly felt like I had stepped back in time about 100 years. It was a dirt floor. Seating consisted of bleachers - literally thin planks of wood tied with rope to makeshift stands. If you had paid the premium price (I think like $5), you could sit a little closer in white plastic chairs.

The show opened with 2 girls, dressed in leotards and streamers that hung from their arms and waist, coming out and basically twirling in circles a few times to the music.

The opening act was essentially yo-yo tricks.

I think the whole operation ran with about 15 people. The first half of the show, several little boys were the stage hands for the different acts, and I wondered if they were sons of the men doing the acts and how they felt traveling with the show all the time. Then the 2nd half the show began, and those little boys were the acts, and the men who had been the acts earlier were now the stagehands!
During the break and after the show, anyone one of them could be seen selling the souveniers and snacks.

Every circus had animals, right? This one had miniature horses, and their tricks mostly consisted of walking the perimeter of the ring, and bowing when introduced.

My favorite act of the show was the clown, though. He wanted to throw knives at someone, and so came and picked someone randomly out of the audience. And trust me, the man chosen was not a plant - the looks on his face made that quite clear as we went through this experience! So, the clown and his assistents tied his arms above his head on the corkboard type thing that was the target. The clown put a ballon next to the man´s hip and started to pace off, preparing to throw a knife and break the balloon. We all knew there must be some trick here, including the poor man from the audience - I mean, this was a clown act after all! But at this point the victim, as I will call him, was starting to look pretty nervous. Then, just before the big throw, the clown has the brilliant idea to use a blindfold! He started to put it on himself, then turned and covered his victim´s face instead. And now, the big moment.....He paced off, turned and encouraged us to make a lot of noise, then quickly handed off the knife to the littlest stagehand, who ran up to the ballon and easily stuck the knife into it! Then they unblindfolded the man, so he could see that the ballon pop he heard was indeed caused by a knife arriving within inches of his body. They proceeded through this routine a couple of more times, and it was just hysterical watching the face of the poor victim each time, sure that the clown was going to hit him with one of those knives!

All in all, the show lasted about 2 hours, brought lots of laughs, and actually included a couple of impressive acts with people flying through the air or doing some amazing balancing. Of course, it also included more clowns, and a girl who could hoola-hoop like nobody´s business :)

Not bad for a cheap night´s entertainment - I only wish we would have had our nieces and nephews with us to enjoy it. And that the bleachers had been just a teensy bit more comfortable.

Prayer Request

2008-07-10T20:32:00.002-04:00

So tell me if this doesn`t sound like a heavy enough workload...
Mon-Fri: 11ish hour workdays
Sat: 7ish hour workday
Sun: work one Sunday/month, about 8ish hours
The work includes: Driving to 28 clients´ houses (14 on Saturdays) to find out why they have not been making payments on their loan and to somehow convince them they need to start paying. Then head to the office for a couple of hours to capture all the data on the day´s work and print out what to do the next day.
This has netted us just enough to pay our bills.

That has been my dear husband´s schedule since we got married (well, for a few months before then too.)

On Tuesday, they had a staff meeting. The workload increased significantly, starting immediately. By significantly, I mean they have to make 35 visits/day Mon-Fri - a 25% increase. Saturday´s workload doubled from 14 to 28 visits. And for the rest of the month they are expected to work every single Sunday - 35 visits.

You may ask, as my husband´s coworkers did, if the increased workload equals more pay. The answer is no. You may also ask if they will be given more gasoline money (they have been receiving enough to pay for about 2/3 of the gas they actually use in a month). Again, the answer is no. So basically, my poor husband is going to put in the equivalent of an extra week to 10 days worth of work this month, and we will have less money when the month ends (because we will have to pay for all that extra gas ourselves - I`m not sure we even have the money to do that).
They were told these changes are definite for this month - there are no promises of what next month will look like.

Are you feeling our need for a breakthrough on the job front? We aren`t looking for a huge salary or anything, just enough to pay our bills with a new baby on the way and have a little bit to set aside for emergencies and such. We aren`t saying he should only work 40 hours a week, but it would be nice if he had more than 3 Sunday`s a month to rest (oh wait, he doesn`t even have that any more!). And having a boss that wasn`t constantly questioning his work ethic and integrity would be nice. One who was actually somewhat encouraging would be a huge blessing.

While I am asking for prayer, I officially entered the 3rd trimester this month, and so the decision about the how and why of the birth needs to be made pretty soon. You see, we can go to the government run hospitals and pay little to nothing (which fits our budget perfectly) - but they are generally overcrowded and understaffed, I would be expected to stay in a bed once admitted (no birth friendly position changing allowed here, nor walking), at least 3 women are put to a room, and my husband is not allowed in the room with me. An even bigger deal when you realize the language issues that could arise. (We are going to ask if the language issue would get my husband in the room with me, but it doesn`t look too likely.)

There are private hospitals, but the cost would be close to 2 months wages.

What I would really like is to have a home birth with an experienced midwife. Unfortunately, that is not common here and it is next to impossible to find midwives. The only one I have found has a prior commitment that takes her out of town every Thursday to Saturday (as in, half of the week), every week, all through September and October. And even if/when we find one, it costs a little more than a month`s wages.

So please pray for wisdom and open doors and peace in both of these major areas of our lives right now. Thanks for helping us in this way. I appreciate your friendships!

A Looooong Overdue Post - including a baby update

2008-07-08T21:05:00.002-04:00

Yes, it has been truly ages since I´ve posted. I´ve since gone home (to my family in Rochester) and come home again (to my husband here in Mexico). Without spending a lot of time making excuses for my prolonged absence, I originally thought I might get some really good posting in while in Rochester with virtually unlimited internet access. Reflecting on why that didn´t happen, I think it is because since coming to Mexico, I´ve learned to see computer time as almost entirely for the purpose of staying in touch - and since I was already spending real time with the vast majority of people I would normally be staying in touch with, I wasn´t real motivated to get online. And I just haven´t gotten on much since getting back, for a variety of uninteresting reasons.

But the trip was great - I managed to spend time with all of my immediate family as well as each of the people on my short list of ´must sees´. That sounds simple, but keep in mind that I am the oldest of 7, and not all of my siblings live in Rochester these days. And coordinating the time to see them around the ´must sees´ busy schedules - I was glad I had kept my goal relatively simple and that I did in fact accomplish it. My apologies to those I wasn´t able to spend time with. I would have liked to, but there was only so much time to go around.

Otrgirl has written at different times about the energy it takes to keep up relationships long-distance. I must say that as good as it was to see everyone, it was also a bit exhausting at times. Of course, being pregnant might also have played a role in my tiredness.

I had lots of people ask me if it was weird to be back, but it was my home for the first 29 years of my life. It was just being home, being with family.

The biggest cultural observation that tickled me - how well trained Americans are to never touch a pregnant woman´s belly, at least without asking first. Here in Mexico, everyone touches my belly. It is often a part of their greeting or good-bye to me- an affectionate belly rub. I am one of those women who don´t actually mind at all, so that works. I´m not sure what it would look like if an American woman that hated belly touching moved to Mexico. But anyways, it was just funny to me to watch everyone´s restraint.

My final note on the trip home is that I missed my husband like crazy and was quite happy to find myself back hom with him when all was said and done.

As for the baby, we went for a check-up last Wednesday - my first visit in almost 2 months. After gaining only 3 pounds the first 4 1/2 months, this visit I had gained 11 pounds!! Guess I am all caught up on weight gain. Otherwise, baby and I both checked out as healthy and on target. The big news was finally getting a clear look at the baby´s gender. Remember this quote:
He said it is still a little early to be sure, and so he`d say he is abotu 80% certain that it is a..... boy! My beloved is thrilled, as he has been hoping for a boy since the beginning, and walked in the clouds the whole rest of the day :) For me it isn`t so important if we have a boy or girl, but it is fun to start thinking more specifically about who is inside of me, and to be able to use his name, etc. Don`t worry, though - we are both well aware that the Dr wasn`t sure, and are waiting for future ultrasounds to confirm.

Well.....as it turns out....the baby is actually a girl! So we had a couple of days of getting our mindset turned around, and now are thinking carefully about the names we didn´t think we´d be using yet :)

Ok, gotta run. But coming soon....photo fest! My sister gave me a memory card reader, so I think I should be able to easily load pics now :)

It`s not easy being green

2008-06-03T20:32:00.003-04:00

Ok, so the point of this post is that I am white, not green. And it isn`t all that bad, really. I just couldn`t resist using that line since it sort of kind of relates to my topic today.

Which is, as you may or may not remember, that I stand out here in Mexico. I am very much in the minority, and very much not Mexican any way you want to look at it. I draw attention on a regular basis, both good and bad.

Ever since that last post on this topic, I have actually had very little of the undesirable type of attention - with one notable exception that I will share shortly. But I have had lots of the innocent type of attention lately. It is a good thing it doesn`t bother me much (I mostly find it slightly amusing), because I have this feeling it isn`t likely to end any time soon. You see, it is based in large part simply on the fact that I look very different - and I don`t forsee that changing. There`s times that it might have to do with my not yet fluent and strongly accented Spanish, so maybe as my Spanish continues to improve it`ll cut back on those times. But really, I think no matter how at home I feel here, I will always be a curiosity to others here.

Some recent examples:
*I stopped in at a papeleria for some copies a couple weeks ago, and the woman launched right into a whole interview/discussion of where I am from, why I am here, the time she spent in the US and her desire to return.

*We recently found a new little grocery type shop that is closer than the others we already knew about and has good prices - round about my 3rd visit, the woman who runs it apparently couldn`t stand her curiosity any longer. `Maam, you aren`t from here are you?` `Where are you from?` `Why are you here?`

*I went along with my friend last week to pick up her son from school. Her son`s teacher took one look at me, turned to my friend and asked, `Where is she from?`. She then turned to me and began to explain in strongly accented and not quite fluent English that she lived 12 years in California.

*Our church helped host a large women`s conference this past Saturday (large = over 200 women). At the beginning of the first service, as everyone turned to greet one another, one woman looked at me and greeted me in English. Later on, I was asked many a question by the women who know people in our church and wondered about me.

You get the idea. It really is interesting to see when and where someone`s curiosity will get the better of them around here!

Now, for the one notable not-so-nice instance of attention. I was sitting on a public bench in the shade downtown, reading my Bible and waiting for my husband to get out of the office. A middle aged couple came and sat at the other end of the bench for several minutes, I think to enjoy a moment in the shade. So at first, when a bit later an older man (in his 60s?) came along and sat down, I didn`t think too much of it. He greeted me, I responded politely and kept reading. A moment or 2 passed, and he said something brillant like, `reading the Bible...?`. I nodded and kept reading. He continued every couple of minutes or so to say things like how pleasant it was to sit in the shade, or to ask if I lived here in Saltillo. He explained he lived in one of the small towns a bit outside of the city. Small talk, you get the idea. I never uttered more that 1-2 words at a time, always going right back to reading. You know how sometimes you just have a feeling about people? He seemed pleasant enough on the surface, but I just had this gut reaction that I didn`t want to interact with him. I kept waiting for my husband to arrive - it was taking longer than he expected. Finally, the man began to work his way around to a point. `I really like ice cream.` Pause. `Do you?` Pause. `Can I invite you to get an ice cream?` I was so thankful to be able to truthfully answer, `I`m sorry. I am waiting for my husband.` He continued with his small talk type comments for another few minutes, and finally got up to leave. At which point it occurred to me that maybe I`d be better off waiting outside the office. :)

New Favorite Frozen Treats

2008-05-24T17:32:00.003-04:00

I now live in a place that is hot at lot of the year, and where most don`t have a lot of extra money to spare. So cheap frozen treats, many of which can be made at home, are very popular here. In fact, lots of people make them at home and stick a sign in their front window announcing that they are selling them, from anywhere from 20 to 50 cents. One of the nice things about making these yourself is that you can control portion size and how healthy it is (or not).

So, I thought I`d share a few of my favorites with you, in the order I tried them.

Bollos (pronounced boy-ohs)
Ok, so the idea here is to use your blender to basically make a smoothie, and then freeze it in a plastic baggie that has been knotted closed. Any fruit, mixed with a little water and sugar to taste. Or you can make milk-based ones - chocolate flavored or with fruit and a bit of sugar to taste. I happen to enjoy the milk-based banana flavor. Like I said, pour it in a plastic baggie and knot it closed. A few hours later, take it out, bite or cut off one corner, and eat it kind of like you would a freeze pop.
One time, I really wanted a bollo, but didn`t have baggies. So I made chocolate milk (with a little vanilla yogurt to thicken my skim milk a bit) in a coffee mug, and stuck it in the feezer. An hour or 2 later, due in part to my impatience and in part to wanting to be sure I could eat it out of the coffee mug, I took it out partially frozen. It was remarkable like a W`s Frosty! Yumm! And I am pretty sure much healthier.

Chocobananas
This is simply a frozen, chocolate covered banana. They sell chocolate here expressly for this purpose - it kind of reminds me the kind of chololate you would use for chocolate fondue or a chocolate fountain. But I think basically any easy to melt chocolate would work. Ususally these are made with half a banana, cuz it is easier to work with and generally satisfies you. So, simply cut your bananas in half, and stick a popsicle/craft stick or fork or something similar in the cut end to hold it by. Then spoon the chocolate over it (it seems to stick to the banana better if you spoon it over than if you dip the banana in it), and freeze. Ready to eat in about an hour. Tip : Freeze on a plastic plate or top of a Tupperware or something similarly flexible, as it is easier to get them off the plate afterwards.

Frozen Yogurt
Ok, so here they say paleta, but that basically means any variety of popsicle. So I thought I`d be more specific. Don`t know why it never occurred to me to simply freeze yogurt before, but it is a new favorite of mine. I follow my sister-in-laws advice and just mix in a little milk before pouring into old but washed individual yogurt containers (you could any small plastic cup), and sticking in a popsicle stick or spoon (plastic works). Freeze a few hours and enjoy! Tip: to get it out of the plastic cup, you want to warm the outside of the cup until the frozen yogurt slides out.

21 days and counting!

2008-05-20T20:38:00.004-04:00

(Quick heads up - I double posted today. Thought I´d warn you all, since it is unusual for me and I don´t want you to miss anything...)

21 days from now I will be in Rochester!! For my first visit home since moving here this past December! I am obviously very excited!

I had not anticipated being able to make a visit home for quite some time, considering our tight budget and all. But a couple of weeks ago, my parents informed me that my dad has enough frequent flyer miles for a free ticket home. Yes, just one - I will be coming alone this trip. But my parents want to gift us with a trip up once the baby is born, for the 3 of us, so that we can introduce our little one to everyone back home. So I´ll be headed up again sometime next winter. All very exciting :)

I´ve been waiting to post about the trip until we settled on some dates. At first it was anytime between now and early August (when I will be too pregnant to make such a trip - airlines actually don´t allow people in their last month or month and a half to get on the plane.). Then we narrowed it down to either mid June or mid July, to work around family plans here and there. Then it looked like we would have a hard time using the free miles in July, and so mid June it would be.

THEN...My husband and I went to immigration on Friday to work on getting all my papers in order for continuing to live here. I currently just have a tourist visa, good for 180 days. Meaning it expires June 7th. So we started asking what we needed to do and working on all the paperwork back in April. Then we didn´t have a car for 2 weeks, and so couldn´t get any errands, etc, done. We got the car back last Tuesday, got the pictures I needed taken done on Wednesday, my love went in Thursday to ask the immigration folks about a couple things we weren´t sure about, and we headed in Friday thinking we had everything in order and ready to go.

Only to have the very immpatient and somewhat annoyed official suddenly start telling us that there are 2 types of visas from which we need to choose, involving different costs, different restrictions, and different outcomes (like the possibility of one day being a permanent resident or citizen here). She explained all of this very quickly, neither of us could quite keep up, forget making a good decision. And to top it off she informed us that we had forgotten one of the papers we needed, and if we didn´t make it back with it same day, it could stall things for 10 days.

Let me just say that one pregnant woman left that office crying.

Well, between the Dr´s appointment we had that morning, my beloved needing to work, and the short hours of the immigration office (they close at 1pm), we weren´t making it back same day. I where before I was slightly nervous about getting all the paperwork done before my trip home, now I was panicked. I begged my family to get some people praying for favor when we took the ´missing´paper in on Monday, as well as asking my Pastor and his wife here to pray. And I worked hard and trusting the Lord and not completely freaking out. I reminded myself that if the Lord could open the door for a trip, He could open the doors for the paperwork as well.

All thanks to the Lord, it turns out there is a very simple, straightfoward process for getting temporary paperwork that will allow me to make my trip, with only a relatively small fee of about $25. So, God willing, I will be in Rochester from June 10th to 25th!
(Umm, I don´t suppose Otrgirl/Jrex, Val, or Becca, or any other out of town friends were planning on stopping in Rochester for those dates...? Just checking....)

At first I was a little hesitant about leaving my husband for very long - we are newlyweds after all, and this will be our first time apart. Plus, he´s gonna have to move home with his mother or something while I am gone, because the man does not cook. But he really wants me to make the most of the opportunity, and it was he who encouraged me to go for at least a week, if not 2. And now my mind is quickly filling the 2 weeks up with all the people I want to see and things I want to do :)

As for the confusion of immigration - please pray. For reasons we do not understand, the immigration office went ahead and started the process for my visa despite missing that one paper and payment, and despite the fact that we never actually determined which we wanted. Of course, they started the paperwork for the other visa, the one we don´t want. So now we have to decide whether to enter into a complicated process of stopping the one and switching to the other, involving re-doing everything.....or going with the flow and waiting till next time around to get the one that puts me on a path to citizenship.

But, at least the door is open for the trip back to Rochester. You all better start blocking out some free time for me ;)

Baby Update

2008-05-20T20:18:00.003-04:00

We finally made it to the Drs on Friday. I say finally because it was 6 weeks after our last appointment due to some rescheduling, etc, and felt like a long time to wait to check in on our little one. Plus, I don´t know if I have mentioned that I am basically addicted to ultrasounds! :)

The baby is doing great - on the measurements the Dr took show good growth and continue to suggest slightly early delivery dates (meaning the baby is a little bigger than would be expected for how pregnant I am). The position of the baby prevented us from being able to check the gender for sure - if you remember, last time we went in, the Dr said he was 80% sure it was a boy, but since I was only 3 months pregnant, it was a bit early to tell. So, I´ll be using the male pronouns in part in the generic sense, in part because we think it is a boy.

The baby was lying on his back (picture me lying on my back for the ultrasound, the baby´s back facing my back), bent double so that his feet are up in front of his face. Which explains why I feel almost all of his movement so far in pretty much the same place - he just keeps kicking those little feet.

We were able to see his little arm and hand, and the Dr counted his 5 little fingers. Then we saw his face, and he opened his mouth just as we were watching (my husband´s favorite part). It is amazing to compare the ultrasound pictures from each visit and see how much bigger he has gotten! I don´t understand how the Dr can estimate weight based on an ultrasound, but he says the baby weighs just under a pound already.

I checked out fine as well, with all of our minor questions being answered with, ´that´s normal´, or ´try this simple remedy´. I only gained 2 pounds in the last 6 weeks, for a total weight gain of 3 pounds since our first appointment 2.5 months ago. Our first appointment wasn´t until I was 2 months pregnant, and I am not totally sure how much I weighed before that as I hadn´t had the opportunity to weigh myself since I left Rochester in December. But I don´t think I gained much before that first appointment either. So here I am, just past the halfway mark of the pregnancy and only up something like 4 pounds. Which amazes me since I feel a lot bigger. I mean, I have the noticably protruding stomach and all. I would be slightly concerned at such little weight gain, as all I´ve read suggests I should have gained closer to 10 pounds. But since the baby appears to be healthy and growing well, I´m just grateful to not be putting on too much too fast.

Sooo...so far so good :) We are more and more excited to get to know this little one, enjoying that we can feel him moving now (did I mention yet that my beloved has even felt the baby move a couple of times already?), and knowing that he can hear us talking to him. Speaking of the baby moving, I can´t be sure since this is my first pregnancy, but I think he sure moves alot! I´ve read where if the baby moves less than 10 times over the course of a few hours, you should check in with the Dr. My baby moves 10 times in under a half hour! Repeatedly throughout the day! But I like having that little bit of connection with him and feeling like I know he is ok.

A little bit about life lately...

2008-05-13T21:09:00.002-04:00

We finally have a car again! Woo hoo! 2 weeks after it broke down and almost as long in the shop (basically just waiting to do a simple repair until the part arrived). But it has been an interesting couple of weeks, and more poor husband`s feet are about to fall right off! He still had to make all his client visits, but by bus and foot.

In the meantime, I have become an official bus rider, making my first few solo rides in the last few days. Gives me a new level of independence, as I could go visit my in-laws or the Pastor`s family by bus now even if my husband is busy working. Admitedly, it takes much much longer by bus, but it is better than nothing!

My other big news of late is that I am definelty feeling the baby move these days! All of a sudden, a week ago today, I was sure that it was the baby I was feeling, and ever since, I have been feeling him a lot! Very exciting. And yesterday morning, he was kicking unusually strongly, and my husband could feel it already!

Thanks to the car issues, the lastest Drs appointment, that should have been last Thursday has been postponed 2x, and we will finally go this Friday. So you can expect a baby update soon :)

Ok, all out of time - until soon...

A little more on `Life Here`...

2008-05-13T20:04:00.002-04:00

Of course, after writing that last post, I thought of several other things I should have mentioned...

For starters, it has been hot here since sometime in early March. By hot I mean generally a high in the 80s, somtimes a bit more. It is a very different type of hot than back home in Rochester. For one, it is dry heat - Saltillo is almost a desert. In contrast, the sun is way more intense here. Unlike people in Rochester who try to soak up every minute of sun they can, those who live in Saltillo rarely spend time in the sun on purpose if they can help it. The nice thing is, this city is apparently known for its natural air conditioning - there is almost always a breeze, and since we are in the mountains, it pretty much always cools off at night. Somewhere around late afternoon or early evening the breeze and air turn decidedly cooler, and although sometimes the houses stay warm for a while, we almost always end up pulling up the covers in bed at night.

On a related note, although I have become an even more religious sun-screen user (with very high SPFs), it is only mid-May and I am already the color I normally am in mid to late summer back in Rochester. I have a feeling I will be discovering new shades of tan I didn`t know I could reach.

Probably in part related to the differences in weather, and in part because people here operate on much smaller budgets, houses here are not made anything close to air-tight like they are in Rochester. So lucky me sometimes finds all manner of insects inside the house without a clue as to how they got in - we`ve had plenty of flies, several crickets, and assorted other bugs I don`t know the names of. I`m not overly squeemish about bugs, but I do generally leave the bug killing to my husband.

Also thanks to the random cracks in the house (especially around window and door frames), lots of dust/dirt gets in. Yes, more gets in because I like to have the windows open, but even closed, dirt gets in. In part this is a function of where we live and the construction going on around us - it is less of a problem for people in well-developed neighborhoods. But you would not believe the amount of dirt I sweep and mop up on a regular basis, and more so after a strong wind or storm of some kind.

And I think my final note on life here will be on church. I miss being able to enter freely into worship - I`m often trying to remember what the song is saying. Ok, often may be a bit strong, as my Spanish is improving. But you get what I mean. And it is a struggle to understand the sermon. I have always been more of a visual than auditory learner, so I have to work to keep up with sermons in English. If I don`t make a real effort, take notes, etc, I don`t remember much afterwards (in English). So I haven`t felt very fed here yet, although I think I am starting to understand enough that maybe I will try taking notes soon and see how I do.

Well, in typical blog fashion, somehow I feel better for having shared all this with you! Hopefully it is somewhat interesting to read :)

On Life in Mexico...

2008-05-05T20:18:00.000-04:00

So sorry! Last time I posted, which was a very long time ago, I promised to get more posts up. And I actually started this post a week ago - but couldn´t finish because my time was shorter than I thought. And then, due to car troubles and the related fall out, I haven´t been on since. Finishing this post was on the top of my list for today,and then for the longest time I couldn´t sign in to Blogger. But I am in now, and hopefully have the time to finish this. Maybe I´ll post it unfinished if my husband comes for me - some news is better than no news, right? :)

I´ve been meaning for ages and ages to write an update on my life here and how I am transitioning, etc. Back when I first wanted to write it, I had the post half written in my head already. A lot has changed since then, but I don´t want to put it off any longer. So here´s hoping this post at least half way flows! ;)

First of all, I know that it is easy to use the blog to dump frustrations at times. And so you all get to hear about tight money or my naseous stomach sometimes.

But what I really want to be sure to say is how very happy and content I am here in my new life. I can´t tell you how many times I think in a week (or sometimes in one day) - how is it that I am soo blessed? Or - I can´t believe how very much I love my husband and he loves me! Or - Is this life really possible or only a dream? Will it last?

I really am very happy married to this man. I know he isn´t perfect, and we´ve already had assorted issues to work through, things from past and present, areas we don´t necessarily agree on. But overall, we are a really good fit for each other. He takes such good care of me - I´m not sure if I could have told you before I got married that I was looking for that feeling, but I sure am content now that I feel I have a husband to cares well for me. And somehow, although I tend to see where I fell short or the things I haven´t gotten done yet, he says the same about me. Do you know what a good feeling it is to have your husband take your hand to pray before a meal, and every single day include a thanks to the Lord for giving him his wife, and the coming child?

Now, as I´ve alluded to in other posts, his job is very demanding and low-paying... obviously I´d love to have a little more time with him and a little less tight of a budget. Really, as far as marriage goes, the biggest change I´d like to make is having more time with my husband. But I think that´s a pretty average for the course kind of request, one that lots of wives have. And in my case, it is one my husband echoes (sometimes the husband chooses to not be home for whatever reasons). So most of the time I don´t even give it that much thought. I just try to make the most of the time we do have together.

Switching topics, everyone always wants to know how my Spanish is coming. Honestly, I feel like I am coming along. I actually go places sometimes without my dictionary (and haven´t regretted it yet)! :) I usually can make myself understood and understand without too much mental effort at this point. I feel like I still have tons and tons of vocab to learn, but I have enough under my belt to get by. I often find myself thinking in Spanish, which they say is a sign of fluency or something to that effect. Of course, lots of times I get half way through the thought in Spanish and realize I don´t have the vocab to finish it and wonder why I am not thinking it in English. But Spanish is beginning to take over to the point that when my husband and I are trying to pratice his English, I am the one that keeps slipping into Spanish!

Talking to strangers and on the phone used to be the biggest struggles. Well, I can´t remember the last time I really struggled to understand/be understood by a stranger. And the other day I found myself talking to one of my closest friends here for 2 hours on the phone!

Speaking of friends - that seems to be another one of the biggies that people ask about. That particular friend has probably become my closest friend. She is in walking distance, and has made a point of telling me how she gets frustrated when I don´t come to visit her in a given week. (She has a baby and a child who needs to be walked to and from school everyday, so its a little harder for her to come to me...) I think second in the running is my sister-in-law. We´re close in age and connect well. And it helps that I get to see her regularly since we always head over there at least on Sunday´s after church (all my in-laws pretty much live together/next to each other). There´s others I´d like to get to know, but it is a bit hard to go visiting (we only have one car, and my husband has it all day for work) - which would help get a foundation started. Little by little I am getting there thru just the little bits of conversation at church.

Hmmm, those are the big points I think. If I missed something obvious, leave me a question in the comments to answer next post. I´m gonna go ahead and post this now while I still have time and everything. And hopefully I´ll be on more consistently again and able to post again soon!

Blessed and a Baby Update

2008-04-16T20:00:00.000-04:00

Hi again! I`m back :) And thanks to a special provision from a completely unexpected source made especially for internet time, I`m back to stay (at least for a while)! :)

The provision for internet time and the fact that I am getting tax refunds from both the state (unheard of for me) and the federal governments, along with that economic stimulus rebate, are the small but significant financial improvements in my little world. And somehow, by God`s grace, yesterday`s paycheck should cover the things we still need to cover from the beginning of the month as well as everything left till the end of the month, and there may even be a little bit left over. So, no huge changes, but the Lord is providing enough, and for now, that is enough.

I`d love to see the whole plan of provision at least through the baby being born - you know, how we will aquire everything we need for the baby, continue paying for prenatal check-ups and the birth, etc. But I think I`d better follow the advice of scripture and not worry about tomorrow. For today, there is enough, and I am grateful. And the special blessing of internet time reminded me yet again of God`s faithfulness and love for me. Internet time falls at the bottom of our list of priorities (you know, somehow food and electricity and things trump email and blogging). But God knew how special it would be for me to continue staying connected in this way and put it on a special friend`s heart to provide a means to do so.

Let`s see, a quick recap of the ways I`ve been blessed since my last post, and felt God taking care of me:
-Last Sunday a conversation began with my husband that opened up all kinds of things inside of him to receive healing and forgiveness and restoration from the Lord. We are still walking it all out, but are very blessed at what the Lord is doing, and know that, `He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion`.

-Last Tuesday, I burnt myself pretty badly (I foolishly reached out to catch a falling frying pan while making breakfast, giving myself blisters on 2 fingers of my right hand). You may be wondering how this could possibly be a blessing, but it worked out that one of my closer friends here, when she realized I basically couldn`t do a thing for the day, invited us over to eat. I ended up staying thru till my love finished work, and we hung out even a bit longer when he came for me. It was a really good time of hanging out. And my friend`s mom prayed over my hand, and within about an hour all pain was gone!

-On Thursday (I think) one of my best friends called me for the first time since I moved here. She had fun news to share, plus we were able to share and encourage each other in something similar we are each walking through. Very encouraging!

-On Friday, I received a really fun package from my aunt (Thank you sooo much!! Real thank you letter to be forthcoming!) She sent along a few things that are hard to get here, as well as baby gifts - and every single item was wrapped in pretty paper. Such fun to open :)

-On Saturday, I went to a baby shower for the Pastor`s wife thrown by a cell group (a Bible study type group). Several of the women there I have only interacted with a handful of times, but they were already working on planning a baby shower for me in the not so distant future!

-On Monday, I received a letter from a good friend I miss very much. I`m so glad she`s a letter writer :)

-On Tuesday, I received a letter from Inkling, a blogger friend with whom I have made a very special connection. Thank you soooo much for blessing me!! Real thank you letter to be forthcoming!)

So, as you can see, I have been blessed by a variety of friends and family. I was a little worried about feeling lonely during my `leave of absence` from the internet. But God is faithful and loving!
_______________________________________________________

Now, for a baby update :)

We headed to the Dr about 10 days ago now. I`d had a blood and urine analysis done earlier in the week, and so the first bit of good news was that all my levels were perfectly normal and healthy and where they should be. He gave me a couple of tips to avoid some random, mild symptoms I`d been having, and prescribed a mild daily medicine to try and curb the many intense headaches I`ve had. (We only just managed to buy the meds this week, but so far so good...) He was extrememly pleased that I only gained about a pound and a half, and all in all I came out with a clean bill of health.

As for the baby, we had another ultrasound. It was amazing, again! The baby had almost tripled in size (length) since the last appointment, and was moving quite a bit - at one point obviously in reaction to the Dr moving whatever you call the thing he uses to do the ultrasound. All the measurements the Dr took of the baby showed healthy and appropriate growth, most of them predicting due dates 2-7 days earlier than the calander due date (I just take that to mean that the baby is growing well). The Dr showed us that there don`t appear to be any signs of birth defects or other signs of worry at this point.

And then the Dr turned to us and asked if we wanted to know whether it is a boy or a girl. He said it is still a little early to be sure, and so he`d say he is abotu 80% certain that it is a..... boy! My beloved is thrilled, as he has been hoping for a boy since the beginning, and walked in the clouds the whole rest of the day :) For me it isn`t so important if we have a boy or girl, but it is fun to start thinking more specifically about who is inside of me, and to be able to use his name, etc. Don`t worry, though - we are both well aware that the Dr wasn`t sure, and are waiting for future ultrasounds to confirm.

So, in summary, we have a healthy, growing baby inside a healthy, growing (but not too much) mom.

Oh, and we did take pictures of my belly right around that same time, as I finished my 1st trimester, and plan on continuing to do so monthly. I also want to take pictures of our house to show you all. I just have to figure out how to post them from a public computer. But they are coming...

Now that I am back on with some regularity, I`ll work on getting some of those promised posts written :)

Temporary Leave of Absence

2008-04-03T21:37:00.004-04:00

Remember that budget I mentioned a coupleof posts ago? And the creative ways we were gonna try to stretch our money out?

Yeah, well, all those creative ideas seem to have backfired,we owe more and have less than we thought, and all of a sudden there is no money to be found.

In part, this is due to the end of last month being especially tight (you can imagine we went through groceries considerably faster with 3 children in the house...), and it´s still affecting us.

But the long and short of it is, after today, I don´t know that I will be able to get online until at least the next paycheck (mid month),and I am not promising anything there. There just is no money for it.

In the meantime, prayers would be appreciated.
1) That the doors would be open for God´s provision to be manifest. I know He is Jehovah Jireh, our Provider - it is just a question of seeing that provision manifested. How cool would it be if the next time I post, I can post about His miraculous provision?!
2) For peace and faith rather than anxiety or discouragement.
3)That I don´t get too ´lonely´ without my online connections.

THank you so much for your prayers - I feel so much better just knowing there are people praying!
Until sometime soon...

Vacation Days, Or Not (and an announcement at the end...)

2008-04-01T22:25:00.000-04:00

Week before last was Holy Week - and in a predominately Catholic country, that is a big deal. Everyone gets lots of time off. Kids had last week and this week home from school. Something like 90% of the country got off Holy Thursday and Good Friday. And the way it works out this year, with Easter being so early, 90% also got off last Monday in celebration of some famous President here.

We were under the impression, leading up to Holy Week, that my beloved would have off Monday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday (he generally works 1/2 days Saturdays, which means half the number of clients visited - not necessarily half the time). So we made plans for a day trip on Monday, thinking later in the week we´d have a lazy day. Lazy days are few and far between (meaning in large part we can sleep in, and get up when we are in the mood, istead of rushing out) - since FB works Monday thru Saturday and the last Sunday of every month, that only leaves Sunday. But of course we get up and go to church on Sundays. So, lazy days...? I think we´ve had one since we returned from the honeymoon.

Instead, he had to work Thursday, Saturday, and....drumroll please....EASTER SUNDAY!
I am sure you all understand the logic there - since clients really want to open their door to a stranger to talk about being behind in their payments on EASTER SUNDAY, if they are even home and didn´t take off on a vacation somewhere. No, the logic was - you all had off Monday and Friday - better work Sunday. And since the office closed a little early Thursday, FB had to hit up the office before getting started on Saturday to finish up from Thursday. Then when he finished for the day, he had to prepare all his visits for both Sunday and Monday. So Saturday was a long day of work.

Monday and Friday, the days he did get off, were´t bad, just not lazy days like we´d been looking forward to.

Monday we did the day trip to a pretty and quaint little town about 2 hours away. The 2 of us had been there once before. This time we took along another young married couple and their little boy. I had just recently been thinking we should hang out once in a while (when there´s time - which is the whole issue) with other young marrieds, so I was fine with Herme´s spur of the moment idea to invite them Saturday night. The weather was weird that day, lots and lots of wind, carrying lots and lots of dust. And spring hadn´t quite arrived there like we´d hoped. But we ate at a nice restaurant and then spent several hours at a park where they have created a pond (they call it a lake, cuz there isn´t much water here. but it is only a pond). The temperature was nice, even if it was windy, and we had an enjoyable time, a mix of keeping to ourselves and hanging out all together. Just before heading home, we hit up a vineyard museum, which was interesting, but would have been more so if the guide talked just a little bit slower.

One highlight for me was a stop at the street market on the way out of town. FB and I had stopped there when we were there a little over a year ago, and he bought me a pink shawl. I wore it when announcing our engagement here and in Rochester, and subsequently on any chilly day when I wanted to feel like my fiance was a little closer to me. It was very pretty, and an important memory item for me. But I lost it a couple of months ago. I think what happened was that it was on my lap in the car, and I forgot when I got up to get out and it fell. By the time we realized it, it was long gone. I was devastated. (And for those of you who know, this happened like the same week as another major possession loss.) But anyways, we found the same vendor and bought another shawl. She didn´t have the same color, but otherwise it is the same, and it comforts me to have it.

Friday, we got up about the same time as a workday and headed to a Good Firday service. It`s a gathering of many churches that all form an alliance, and different people from different churches take turns reading the last 7 things Jesus said during the crucifixion. Afterwards, there was a picnic style lunch and everyone fellowshipped for a bit. And in the culture here, that means everyone packed a whole lot of one thing and shared it with everyone else. Everyone always shares here. It was good, and lasted til about mid afternoon. I got sunburned - didn`t know it was outside, and apparently the tarps providing my shade were not all that protective. AFterwards, we spent some time with my in-laws, then headed home to get that budget done.

Easter Sunday our church did a sunrise service (although the sun never rose, it was one of those rare cloudy and chilly days here), so we were able to go to service before FB had to work, which was nice.

The other part of that week that kept life interesting was that when we returned to town Monday evening from our day trip, we headed straight over to my in-laws to pick up 3 very excited children. Our 2 nieces (10 and 7) and great-nephew (6) had been dying to spend the night at our house for weeks. And since they were on vacation for 2 weeks, they came and stayed with us until Thursday morning. Great vacation for them - a bit exhausting for me!

Remember the weird windy weather we had Monday? Well, Tuesday morning, the temperature dropped to the 40s, and there was so much dirt being carried in the wind that visibility was bad. And dirt was coming in thru every crevice of the house - door jams, windows, you name it. So, I had 3 very excited children stuck inside for the better part of the day. I have no toys other than a game of Dominos, a few childrens books, but mostly in English, and no TV - and a pretty small house. The saving grace was when I remembered late in the day the Play-Doh recipe I had - all dead time from that moment on was spent pretending to be a bakery or restaurant. (By the way, the recipe was from a cook-book the church ladies put together back in Rochester a year or 2 ago. Any one from there reading this - I love that little book and reading what you all wrote, and have used several recipes already!)

The next day we had much nicer weather, walked the 20ish minutes to visit someone from church and later hit up a nearby playground. Still tiring, but in a less anxious, pent up kind of way. I taught the kids Mother, May I? and Red Light, Green Light. Since hardly anyone here has any yard to speak of (homes are usually all built right up against each other), any time spend at a playground or even in an open patch of grass is much enjoyed.

Ok, this post is a book. I promise the others I am planning to write shouldn`t be quite this long. But as computer time in the next few days will be devoted to getting my taxes done, I`m not sure when the next post will be. I do hope to write fairly soon, though, because my second prenatal appointment is Friday. Can you believe that today officially marks the beginning of my 2nd trimester already?! And yes, I am trying to figure out how to post the occassional picture of my growing belly.

Oh, and I forgot to post last week in the midst of all my catching up, that I am an aunt again!! My brother and his wife welcomed their first into the world Saturday, March 22. From what I am told, she`s beautiful, with lots of hair. It`s crazy hard not knowing when I will meet her. But then, as they live just that far away from the rest of the family, only my parents have been able to meet her so far, and the others aren`t sure when they will. This is the first baby that we all (or almost all) didn`t meet in the first 48 hours - times are changing in our family I guess.

No, really, I´m still alive

2008-03-25T22:52:00.003-04:00

I know, I know, you all think that I fell off the face of the earth or something. But I really am still here. It´s just that I only made it to a cyber cafe once in the last 10 or so days, for less than an hour (which really was just enough time to weed thru the backlog of emails I´d accumulated). And today I don´t have much time to write, because again, I had a backlog of reading to do. But I have like 4 half written posts in my head to share with you in the coming days, such as:
-the highs and huh?s of pregnancy
-vacation days, or not
-a general how I am adjusting to life here type update
-the comfort in stereotypes

But please have patience with me in getting these posted. You see, we finally sat down to make a budget. At first we put it off because we weren´t exactly sure what are expenses were, or what certain bills would end up looking like, and then we had to find a good time. But we did it. And it turns out that for the moment, we have just enough, and I mean just enough, money to pay our bills. (Thank You, Lord!) There are still a couple of things we are working on to help make money stretch, as well. But my point is, that technically, although coming to the cyber cafe is a big deal for me, and is relatively cheap (about 75 cents/hour), it rates more as a luxury than a necessity. And our budget is very, very tight. SO - depending on how things go with those ideas of how to make the money stretch, my time may be more limited than it has been. I will do my best to use my time productivey and not get sucked in to random cyber surfing, etc. But it may be tricky to post real often.

But posting at least one of the before mentioned posts is on my to-do list for later this week. provided I have time.

I only have a few minutes left...

2008-03-11T21:06:00.002-04:00

...but for those who were wondering, we saw PS: I love you on Friday night. We both enjoyed it, although sometimes I get a little annoyed with the stuff they throw in there (like why did she have to sleep with the guy on their 1st date?). But overall, it was relatively clean, and one of those sweet, sappy, romantic comedies that will most likely make the ladies cry (I know I did, several times). American movies arrive here still in English, with Spanish subtitles, which means we both get to fully enjoy it (although FB admittedly has to work a little harder). And turns out movies are way cheaper here - only cost $45 pesos each, which means about $4 American dollars.

In other news, in case you weren´t sure, it is not fun having to get up and go to the bathroom anywhere from 2-5 times in a single night! I used to get up once most nights, but this is getting out of control. I don´t drink much in the evenings, even if I am thirsty. And I go to the bathroom right before bed. I even lean foward, which I read is supposed to ensure you really empty your bladder (sorry if this is TMI for anyone - but it is driving me crazy!). Not so restful to wake up every couple hours for a bathroom run.

Oh well. Out of time.

Sshhh! It`s a secret!

2008-03-07T19:05:00.002-05:00

You see, I was paid a very high compliment this week, in an area in which I have already shared my insecurities with you all. And it came from the person most able to affect me with such a compliment. But it is the type that can`t get back to certain people. However, since those people live here in Mexico and speak Spanish, and my readers generally live in the US and speak English, I thought maybe I could share here.

My dear, sweet husband told me this week that I am a better cook than his mother. (And his mother is generally known to be a very good cook.)

Now, I am keeping in mind that this came at a time when he happened to be very hungry - everything tastes better when you are hungry. But it was said very sincerely, and pretty much blew me away.

-----------------------

In other news, I don`t think I have mentioned yet here how excited FB`s family is about my pregnancy. They have already started buying us baby clothes! And you should have seen and heard them the other night when we showed them the ultrasound picture. And they keep making me model for them to see if I am showing yet (enough for FB and I to tell, not too noticeable to most other folks). All in all, it`s fun.

I am happy to say that I am one of those people that really enjoy my in-laws. A couple of Herme`s brothers are really quiet, and we are only just starting to be comfortable initiating conversations with each other. But the brother closest to me in age is really outgoing and loves to pick my brain about one thing or another. He`s managed to pick up enough English words to help me along when I`m not sure what he is saying, too. And his sisters and I hit it off since the beginning, as well as the neices and nephews. We get along even better now that I have improved enough in my Spanish that I don`t feel like they are talking at the speed of light ;)

Well, we are giving ourselves a rare treat and heading to the movies in a little bit, so I am going to get going. FB has had a great workweek, getting out much earlier than usual (by several hours) a couple of days and an hour or 2 early the other days. If only his weeks could be more like this on a regular basis!

My Baby! :)

2008-03-04T19:47:00.003-05:00

We had our first prenantal check up this morning, and it was so exciting!

Our Pastor and his wife had recommended this particular doctor to us (they are currently under his care for their pregnancy). At their suggestion, they accompanied us in order to present us to the doctor as friends that they recommended him to, which was really nice of them to take the time to do. It also helped us with the practicalities of figuring out where we were going the 1st time, etc.

It was a pretty straight forward appointment overall, with him asking some basic questions and laying down the law as far as my diet and activity levels are concerned. He is really friendly and likeable, and you really get the sense he knows what he is doing. The only downside is that he talks kind of fast, so I couldn´t always keep up with him (as in, my Spanish isn´t quite good enough...). I think I will be able to in another month or 2, but in the meantime, thankfully have this great husband who will be accompanying me, and who pretty much knows all my answers anyways :) And he even explains to me afterwards anything I missed.

But the exciting part was the ultrasound! What a gift of technology, allowing us a glimpse at God´s miraculous creation of a new little person inside of me! It was very clear, and both FB and I could easily identify the head, hands, feet, etc, even before the Dr explained. The Dr also showed us the beating heart and developing brain, and said taking size and everything into account, all appears to be coming along normally and healthy. The size of the baby was right on track, giving a predicted due date within 3 days of what the Dr had said based on the calendar.

Speaking of the baby´s size, he or she is 3.12 cm long from head to rump, which happens to be the length of the upper 2/3 of my pinky finger. I keep looking down at my finger and picturing the little baby I saw moving around this morning. So amazing.

We both walked out of there several feet above the ground, I think. And we have stayed in a slightly dazed state all day.

I think seing the baby like that was especially good for my husband, as he was just expressing the other day that he kind of wishes the baby were born already, because he feels so unconnected or far removed from the baby right now. I don´t think he feels quite that way anymore :)

So, all is well and developing right on track. Next month we´ll have some basic lab work done so the Dr can check my levels of whatever is doctors check. In the meantime, he made some suggestions to help with the congestion and nauseaness. And I am supposed to cut way back on carbs, salt, and junk food and up my intake of fruits, veggies, water, etc. Sounds basic, I know, but was reassuring to me as such dietary onversation are much more rare here.

Odor Update and A Doctor

2008-02-29T20:10:00.002-05:00

Well, I am so glad I blogged about the bathroom smell. I should have gotten to it sooner! Although the smell is not yet gone, I do believe we now understand the problem and are on our way to fixing it (well, having someone fix it). As a couple of people commented, we believe it is a sewage smell creeping back up into the house. As a dear and very knowledgable man from my church back in Rochester emailed me, it is probably that we have a problem with the trap in that drain, whose very job it is to prevent the sewage smell from entering the house. I am thrilled that the end is in sight!

In other news, we made my first prenatal appointment today! I am very excited! We will be going on Tuesday morning at 10, to the same Dr our Pastor and his wife use. The best part is, this Dr is apparently very good, and provides care much more like what Americans would expect (not that anyone said it quite that way to me, but I´ve been told many times here prenatal checks consist of feeling the woman´s belly and sending her on her way. Whereas this Dr cares about things like vitamins and iron levels and weight gain). And the fun part is that he does an ultrasound every single month, and sends you home with the picture! So in just a few days I might get to see my baby for the 1st time!

Other than that, the most interesting thing I can share is that overall, weather here has been hitting highs of least upper 60s, if not mid 80s. Apparently, this weather is unusual and early, and things that normally don´t bloom or bud till almost May are already out. Part of me can hardly believe this is February, the other part has almost forgotten what a Rochester winter looks like!

Oh, and in answer to a question from Inkling in the comments a few days back, I have had no problems whatsoever receiving packages so far. I have had delivered to my door one smallish and one fairly large package with not a word said to me about customs or duty or any such thing. (Both senders had marked ´gift´on the customs declaration) I was both very excited and very grateful, not having been sure ahead of time how that would work out.

Miraculous solution, anyone??

2008-02-26T20:31:00.002-05:00

Ok, so a little while back, we had a drainage issue in our upstairs bathroom, off our bedroom (you now know the extent of my 2nd floor). The shower got completely clogged up, and there was water standing in the shower stall for several days until the man our landlord hired finally arrived to fix it. Soon after the fix-it man drained out all the water, an absolutely terrible odor developed. WE assumed something left over from the standing water was the cause. Within the first few days of this odor developing, I cleaned the shower with my all-purpose lemon scented disinfectant. Each time, it seemed better, but by the end of the day, the odor was obviously making a comeback. So we bought a small bottle of chlorinated bleach. I used that all up by cleaning the shower a total of 4 times over a couple of days, varying the intensity of the solutions I used and the amount of time I left it before rinsing (the last time, I used ir straight out of the bottle.) EAch time, it seemed better, but by the next morning, the ordor had returned. I need some new approaches here.

The trouble is that the smell is absolutely awful for my pregnant nose and stomach. So it may very well be that is just needs someone to take the time to scrub really thoroughly with the bleach, but I don´t think I can stand to be in there that long. And my husband is never home long enough to tackle such a job (literally - it would mean not sleeping or something). Those unavoidable-because-I-am-pregnant middle of the night bathroom runs? I first cover my nose with a tissue, clamp it closed, and take a deep breath all before entering the bathroom, then get out as quick as I can and don´t unclamp my nose until I am several feet away from the closed door. Last night, I made my husband switch places with me - I usually sleep on the side closer to the bathroom, but was sure I could smell it from bed.

But I feel like 2 rounds of disinfectant and 4 rounds of bleach should have killed anything. I don´t want to even consider the whole long period of serious scrubbing unless I have a fool-proof method in hand.

So, anyone have a miraculous solution for me??

Tidbits

2008-02-19T20:13:00.004-05:00

This post is a random collection of thoughts and observations I have been wanting to share...

They are building a new section to our relatively new neighborhood behind our house. I think it much have something to do with being made in the image of our Creator that makes it so very interesting to watch the process of something being built. I often watch from my upstairs window for a few minutes, and usually check daily on how much progress has been made.

I am not thrilled about having houses put in behind us, as it will feel much more closed in, but I am grateful that my bedroom window will look out at the little bit of space between houses instead right into someone else´s bedroom window. And I am grateful that there are no houses right across from us. I think they will someday turn the open patch of dirt into a park.

I´m looking forward to reaching the benchmark of 2nd trimester in about another month... the nauseasness and tiredness are getting old, and I am hopeful that some of that will ease as the 1st trimester ends.

Any worries I had about filling my day as a homemaker disappeared with the onset of pregnancy. I am lucky to keep up with the basics these days.

I´m realizing that I have a lot of fear attached to doing anything outside of my comfort zone - which includes kind of a lot of things, sometimes. I´d appreciate prayer to be released from this. I know it is natural to be nervous, etc, about new things, but in a situation where I am often confronted by new things are something outside my comfort zone (I´ve moved to another country, for goodness sake!), this whole fear issue can be a bit debilatating.

Although still being asked to work harder and do more, my beloved husband received some rare praise last night for a job well done in recent weeks. For this, I am grateful. And for the fact that he might actually get home by 8 tonight, instead of 9 or later.

Of course, last night was also when we thought we´d be getting news about the level of insurance coverage his company will provide for my prenatal/birth care, but instead found out his boss forgot to take the marriage certificate to HR in Monterrey last week. Supposedly he took it today; we now have to wait up to another week.

It is interesting the little things you learn about a person when you live with them. For example, my husband religiously checks expiration dates when making a purchase and/or consuming something we have had for a while. On the other hand, though, I´ve seen him eat fruit or homemade items well past the date I would have considered them edible.

I know there was more, but I am afraid pregnancy brain strikes again! It´s all mush now, and I can´t for the life of me think what else there was. I´ll be so annoyed later when the things I have been wanted to share with someone suddenly pop back into my head. Oh well.

How I am feeling, Prayer requests

2008-02-13T20:36:00.003-05:00

How I am feeling is a question I seem to get from everyone I talk to, so I thought some of my readers may be wondering as well.

I am pretty much mildly nauseas most of the time, although some days are better than others. I have yet to throw up at all, and usually can eat something, although often not just anything. I keep saltine crackers, water, and hard candies on me at all times, any of which seem to help when I get too uncomfortable. I try to eat a little something every few hours. I also learned this week that it is important to eat a little something in the evening, especially if I am at all hungry. I tried to ignore feeling hungry as we were just settling in to fall asleep the other night... and felt absolutely awful the next morning. I won't do that again!

I am also very tired. If I didn't keep reading on pregnancy websites and hearing from people who have been pregnant that being really tired is normal at this point, I would feel a little ridiculous. Although I rarely actually take 3 naps a day, I almost always want one every morning, every afternoon, and every evening. I usually let myself have one longer one, and sometimes one other quick one. Of course, 'longer' can mean anything from 40 min to 2 hours, depending on how I feel on a given day!

This quote was in the weekly email I am getting from Baby Center...
"I'm seven weeks pregnant, and I'm having every symptom in the book — from morning sickness to sore breasts. Is it possible to feel huge already?" — Janean

I laughed when I read this, because although my clothes basically still fit an all, I do feel a lot bigger already. And I have quite a few of the basic symptoms as well. But overall, I am not complaining. I am not throwing up, and for that I often give thanks.

Oh, the other thing I am experiencing is a lot of congestion, which apparently can be a pregnancy related symptom. This I would appreciate prayer for, as it is wearing on me. Plus, then I have trouble beathing at night, which makes it harder for both of us to sleep. And, congestion related coughing engages my gag reflex, which is the when I come closest to really losing it. All in all, I am ready to be done with the congestion.

Speaking of prayer requests, my big one is for my beloved's job situation. He is frustrated by the tediousness of the work, and by his supervisor's style of leadership...which includes up to 4 calls in a day reminding him to work hard and get everything done. And the salary just isn't sufficient. It already wasn't, and now we have a baby on the way. Not to mention things like me needing maternity clothes, prenatal vists, etc. I was going to blog a while back, but never got that far, how in early January, they were told 'positive changes' were coming to the comapany, which would lighten the workload and possibly raise salaries. These changes are supposedly coming in February or March. But so far nothing else has been said. So, we are praying for either really good changes to come quickly, or a new job to open up. The trick is, while working, he doesn't have a lot of time for job hunting...so it has to be the Lord.

We had a major car repair recently, which I think just added the pressure on my beloved. He has taken to saying almost daily, sometimes multiple times a day how he needs a new job. Then last night, he asked me if I think he's a bad person, like lazy or something, because he doesn't want this job anymore. Poor guy. He's working his tail off, getting hounded by his boss like he isn't, and getting paid next to nothing for it....and he feels bad that he doesn't like his job!

God has always been faithful to provide for me in the past, so there is a part of me that is sure He will this time too. Then there is that human part of me that struggles every blasted time to have faith. Anyways, I know He will be faithful to provide again, I just would like prayer that the doors open soon, and that we recognize them when they do.

Well, I think I'll leave it at that for now. I really am trying to blog more consistently, but of course lately I have too easily allowed myself to sucked into reading pregnancy pages! But my desire is to get better. So, maybe I will!

Can´t say I didn´t warn you!

2008-02-05T21:05:00.000-05:00

I mean, I don´t know what I was thinking. It like runs in the family after all. For some reason, I was thinking of generic statistics and timelines more than what I know to be true for our family. Silly of me. That is, what I am trying to say is....

I´M PREGNANT!!

When we realized that our chosen form of birth control was not going to work for us, we did consider (and even try) a few other options. But none of them felt right. Although we had planned on waiting maybe 6 months or a little more, we ended up feeling like we needed to just give the reins over to the Lord right off the bat.

And although my beloved husband was pretty sure from the moment we stopped using birth control that I would end up pregnant, I really didn´t think I would. Not right off the bat anyways. Don´t get me wrong - I loved the idea of getting pregnant, and any nervousness I had pre-wedding about getting pregnant right away disappeared on the wedding day. I just figured it could take a few months.

But then my normally very timely period didn´t arrive. That day was when it finally sunk in for me that it was a very real possibility. Because I was sick (congestion, very sore throat) and got to the Dr. about 20 minutes too late, I took an over the counter pregnancy test when I was only a day late. Neither of us had slept well due to my sickness (my sore throat kept waking me up, and my congestion kept waking him up), but I didn´t want to take anything I shouldn´t if I was actually pregnant. The test gave us a very, very faint positive result. We were thrilled!

The next day we did make it to the Dr. He gave me a pregnancy test, although just another over the counter type, and it came up negative. He took his test result very seriously, and had little to nothing to say about the positive result fro the night before. I figured there was a good chance it was just because it was so early still, but it did throw us off a little.

Several days later, still no period, and having felt naseous everyday, we were sure enough that we started telling parents what we were thinking.

Finally, this past Thursday, a friend from church (also our landlady), a blood lab analyzer by profession, came over with all the equipment to do the bloodwork in my living room. Is that crazy or what? Sitting on my living room couch, she took my blood, spun it to separate it, and did the pregnancy test. In her words, now there was no doubts.

We´ll get to the Dr to begin prenatal care as soon as we finish up my paperwork to be married/live here. (The other Dr we went to is just for walk-in consults. Not necessarily long-term prenatal care.) Hopefully we´ll wrap all that up in the next couple of days.

According to the handy-dandy computer calculators, I am due September 30th.

Well, for some of you, this is how we communicate, so I figured this was the best way to tell you. Others of you will hear from family, etc, but I thought you might like to hear the story from me :)

Because I owe you one...

2008-01-30T21:14:00.000-05:00

I just realized how much time has already gone by since that last post. It has almost been 2 weeks! I had no idea! Time is really flying by me.

I have had all kinds of great post ideas floating around in my head, but never have the time and/or mental energy to really pull one together. So I haven´t written anything. Instead, I am going to give you a few blurbs of the ideas that have been rumbling around in my head, and maybe some day in the future I will expound on anything I feel like gets cheated by doing it this way.

I wrote a while back about the independent streak in American culture vs. the community orientation of Mexican culture. What follows are some of the things I have been noticing that play out of that difference.

For example, in America, we get tons of junk mail and correspondence from companies we are affliated with (ie banks, credit cards, car, etc). This is the primary form of communication from advertisers and companies that want to keep us informed of our standing with them. Here in Mexico, people go door to door. This is in part because the mail system is so unreliable, but it really plays a part in the different sense of community. Salespeople, creditors, even the government - they all come to your door if they need or want to make contact with you. And if you are not home, it is perfectly acceptable to explain the purpose of your visit to a neighbor and ask them to make the contact for you. Can you imagine the average American´s response to a creditor or government official explaining their problems to a neighbor?

Although there is now what I would definetly consider a mall here in Saltillo, and many large plazas, in general you go about shopping in a very different way. When you want to, ´go shopping´, you go downtown and walk the streets wandering in and out of little shops. If you just need to grab something, you walk to the nearby appropriate shop in your neighborhood. For example, if you need a notebook or a map, you go to the nearnest ´papeleria´(paper shop). If you need a gift, or the fixings to wrap a gift, find the nearest shop labeled ´regalos´(gifts). Oh, and don´t bother buying whole rolls of paper for a single gift - there is no place in the house to store it anyways. Just buy a sheet or 2 for about a quarter.

In America, we generally chant the mantra that beggars and panhandlers are just trying to get another fix of drugs or alcohol (so don´t give them any money). Here it is understood that you are not so far above the person asking and it is very hard to find work, especially if you have any type of disability. A large percentage of the population freely gives out their pocket change to everyone from the person sitting on the sidewalk to the person somehow performing entertainment in the street in hopes of donations to the deaf person that walks door to door with a paper explaining her plight. Homemade food being sold door to door is also easily bought up.

Well, enough cultural comparisons for the moment. I have to get going. But I´ll try to write again sooner this time!

A Cultural Observation and A True Wifely Rollercoaster

2008-01-18T21:17:00.000-05:00

Ok, so let me preface this by saying that in no way am I attempting to put myself down or put myself on some type of pedastal....this is purely a cultural observation and something I am trying to adjust to. I consider myself to have a pretty healthy self-image, all things considered, so dont worry about that in reading the following.

In America, as in, all of my life up until now, I was not what one would consider stand-out pretty. I think, normally, you have to be blond, extra tall or thin, or bronzed skined to garner extra attention from the male species. (Excuse all my broad generalizations, please) I have long been average height and weight, very white, and decidely brown-haired. Nothing that attracted a whole lot of obvious attention in public.

Here, however, I automatically stand out because I am American. And you can see in my sidebar picture just how much whiter I am than people here. In Rochester, there is a pretty diverse cross-section of many nationalities. Here, it is pretty much completely, uniformly, Mexicans. I am very different. (I am also very thankful for brown hair so I can at least blend in a little bit!) I draw attention. I mean this in the most innocent of ways as well as the not so innocent of ways. I am pretty sure that I am remembered by my 2nd visit of any of the little shops, cybers, or even the supermarket I frequent. I am memorable. But also, when I walk by myself somewhere (which I do somewhat regularly since I do not have my own car and happen to like walking), men on the streets are staring at me....and occassionally vocalizing their attention.

Being recognized in the places I frequent is something I appreciate. It makes unfamiliar places and things feel comfortable and safe faster, especially since it makes for that many less people I have to worry about understanding the fact that I am not yet fluent in Spanish.

Being whistled or stared at is something I do not like at all. I am currently reevaluating my wardrobe. Do I own things less flattering? Mind you, I usually just have on your basic pair of jeans and a comfortable top. Should I buy a few baggy, shapeless items for when I leave the house alone? Do I dress as always and just continue to act like I do not see or hear these men? Thoughts, anyone?

My oh-so-wonderful husband hopes it never happens in his presence, because he thinks he will react in anger. However, I am pretty sure it is unlikely to happen as long as I am with him. He says to just ignore it as I have been, though.
-----------------------------------------

So, I lost it last night, just broke into tears, while talking to my husband. I am sure you all can understand.... I mean, he told me he did NOT want his breakfast sandwhich this morning quite the way I planned on making them. That is obviously cry worthy, right? You all see where I am coming from here, I am sure.

Seriously, though, I got pretty upset when he made faces and expressed the exact opposite of interest in the combination of ingredients I mentioned (and that I was actually looking foward to). I insisted he at least try it (he never had before). But I did not realize how upset I was until he said something to the effect of, *Ok, I will try it. Just please dont be sad about this, ok?* At which point I started crying.

At first I wasnt even sure why. Then I realized, I have been a little stressed about the whole cooking thing. Cooking for him is one of my most important wifely tasks, you know? And I need to cook at least 2x a day.... culturally, you eat a big, cooked breakfast that can last you until the big, main, midday meal. But I do not know how to make very many of the dishes he is accustomed to, at least, not yet. And one of the ones I thought I did know how to make (eggs with chorizo), he had told me a few days earlier he prefers a different way!

We have discussed that at times I will make things I am familiar with and that he is more than willing to try them. I had always found him to not be very picky, and it appeared he´ll eat just about anything. But as I said, this week he actually asked me to make something differently, and now he was telling me he did not want what I planned on making for breakfast. You can understand how I suddenly had nightmarish visions of him regularly refusing to eat what I made, particularly anything I am really comfortable making. And so I lost it. (This would be the low point of my above mentioned wifely rollercoaster.)

I was able to express what I was feeling, he did his usual great job of comforting me, and agreed to try things even if it sounded strange to him (he ended up liking my breakfast by the way). We also discussed the possibility of me spending time with him mom and sisters so I can learn more about the dishes he is used to (which was something I had thought I´d be able to do back when I was going to live with them before the wedding).

And now you may be wondering, what about the high point of my wifely rollercoaster?

Well, I made rice today for our midday meal. And it was good.

That may sound silly and little to you all, but let me explain. This is coming from the girl who only ever bought anything other than instant rice one time when I first moved out of my parents house and didn´t acutally know the difference between real and instant rice but only saw that it was cheaper. I don´t think I ever made it more than once...? In case you weren´t sure, they don´t eat instant rice here.

To further explain, not only do they not use instant here, but it is not cooked in a saucepan. They cook it in a frying pan. In fact, they start out by cooking it in oil. Then you add flavorings and something that turns it pink. And the few times I tried to ask anyone about how to do it, I got very vague instructions (cause it is just one of those things that everyone here does, and does slightly differently).

So maybe now you can appreciate why it was such a high point for me, especially after last night´s cooking breakdown, to successfully make tasty rice, and be told by my husband (who did not know I had never made it before) that it was really good. :)

A bit more...

2008-01-14T19:44:00.000-05:00

I only have like 10 minutes, but I thought I{d add a bit more about life here...
(sorry to those who are punctuation conscious...I can{t for the life of me figure out how to type an apostrophe on this keyboard!)

Some good news...stove is hooked up and working great! and washer should be by days end. And we are off to buy the dryer my family gifted us with the money for :)

Some fun news...I received my first real piece of mail last week. I think it was Friday. I was walking home from visiting a friend and found myself wondering where they would put are mail were we to ever receive some, since no one here really has mailboxes. And what did I find when I walk in my door but a letter for me that had been slipped under the door, from a good friend with the same first name as me :)
What an awesome treat that was! Please, please...write to me! Emails are great too, for those mail challenged. Ive loved the few emails I{ve gotten from friends and family so far! But gosh, what good it did me to have a touchable taste of home!

And before I run out of time, I got to thinking how I went into narration mode last time and failed to mention the really amzing man I now have for a husband. So far, his worst quirk is the large amounts of soap he feels a need to use, either when washing his hands or in the shower. Mot bad huh? And Ive only been more impressed by all of his good qualities. I know there are many of you who think you have the best husbands out there, but I know I really do! ;) Ok, maybe hes just the best husband for me, but one way or another, hes the best!

K, Im gonna go cuz if I dont post this before my account runs out of time, I lose everything Ive written.

Until soon!

For Carole...(and everyone else who has faithfully waited...)

2008-01-11T21:31:00.000-05:00

Sorry, folks, that it has been so long!

Those last 10 days before the wedding were a little hectic, especially once my family arrived and I felt like I needed to host them on top of accomplishing all the myriad of things that needed doing before the wedding day. But it all got done, in large part thanks to my family´s help and that of the few friends who made it down. Except that our mattress never arrived (it should have arrived a solid week before the wedding), and so the day of the wedding we had to make other plans for where to sleep that night. ;)

The wedding day...hmmm...I think it must be a little bit like when a woman gives birth and the hormones cause her to forget the worst of labor...
I know it was crazy that day, and I felt completely depleted. And I did have one true complete breakdown when I thought for about 2 and half minutes that we didn´t have my wedding jewelry. But when I think about that day, I only remember from about 4pm onwards. My sisters-in-law and good friend did a fabulous job on my hair so that it looked salon quality, and just what I wanted. Everything came together just as it should, found jewelry included, and when it came down to it, although it felt slightly unreal, I was very calm and very ready.

If any of you ever get a chance, you should really experience a Mexican wedding sometime. Although there are many parallels to what Americans are used to, it is definetly a different experience. For example, our invites said the wedding was at 5pm. I think we started a little after 6 - and felt good that we started that early! They have a few additions to the ceremony itself that are really very beautiful - like the gift of kneeling cushions to symbolize the part that prayer will pray in your marriage. And how many of you have played musical chairs a wedding ceremony?! Or any other games that involve the distinct possibility of someone getting hurt, but make you laugh like crazy?

Really, though, it was so beautiful and wonderful. And I didn´t even cry during my own wedding ceremony, if you can belive that! I wouldn´t change a thing about it. A Pastor and good friend from Rochester gave a beautiful word, his wife (who I miss like crazy!) very graciously translated the majority of the service, and our Pastor here did the vows and what-not.

I´m really looking foward to seeing pictures (I think tomorrow!), because I know there were details I couldn´t take in, and because I think the photographer did a great job.

Oh, to backtrack a second, I got really nervous just before my family came that they wouldn´t like or wouldn´t understand Saltillo - it is a whole different world from Rochester. And I so love it here, I wasn´t sure how I´d handle that. And I was nervous about our families being able to connect with knowing so little of each other´s languages. But I worried for naught. If anyone didn´t like it here, they hid it very well :) And somehow our families really connected - a couple of them even want to stay in touch.

Beyond the wedding day, the honeymoon was awesome. We absolutely enjoyed every minute of it, with only a couple of exceptions: we missed our flight and had to leave the next day instead (FB´s brother was using FB´s car to take his sister to the hospital, which had one of my bags and FB´s ID in it); and we ended up having to call in the hotel Dr for some type of infection or something that required 3 different types of treatment and occassionaly make him feel like he was in a hospital or something. But neither of those things slowed us down much, and all in all it was a beautiful week that I wish would have lasted longer.

FYI, the birth control we had planned on doesn´t work for us after all....so we´ve just kind of decided to see what happens. So no one should be too shocked if I end up pregnant sooner than I´d originally thougt.

I know this is getting way long, but its been ages since I´ve written, and I don´t know what I´ll get another chance. SO, if you´ll all bear with me, I just want to give you a taste of what my married life looks like here.

Monday: I cried a little when FB left for work the first time, then cleaned like crazy cuz I don´t think our place ever had been. And started organizing our things. After FB came home for the midday break, I went with him the rest of the day. That night, we discovered our mattress and stove finally arrived at his family´s house, but we couldn´t transport them back to us yet.

Tuesday: Our suitaces arrived from the honeymoon finally, our sofa set arrived (I was so excited - they are so pretty!), I walked our neighborhood a bit looking for a cyber cafe, and instead finding 3 near-by neighborhood stores (kind of like tiny groceries where you can get many of the basics).

Wednesday: I walked 20ish minutes to the supermarket to do our first real grocery shopping, and returned by taxi. Managed to make a meal without a stove still. In the afternoon I walked again to the supermarket to get what I needed to do laundry by hand since we can´t hook up our machine still. Stove and mattress arrived that night, but I´m still waiting for the stove to get hooked up.

Oops, gotta go, but the rest of the week included more laundry and walking 2oish minutes to visit with a friend for a couple hours.

So, alls well. ANd hopefully I´ll settle into a routine soon where I can write more.

From Mexico!!

2007-12-19T21:26:00.000-05:00

Warning- If this post ends suddenly, it is because my man has returned to the cyber for me, and I have to get going...

So, I´m here and all is well. I´ve been here almost 10 days and only had one day of real homesickness, like how am I possibly going to live this far from so many I love. But not a bad ratio so far, huh? And my beloved FB held for as long as I wanted to cry, encouraged me then and the next day to cry whenever I need to, and proposed that if it turns out to be too hard for me to live here, he thinks it´d be easier on him to live in Rochester. I don´t at all think that´s something we want to pursue at this point, but I soooo appreciate him saying so!

Things have been going well, although very busy. FB´s job involves spending the majority of the day driving around to the homes of clients behind on their accounts. So the best way for us to accomplish the myriad of errands, etc, is for me to spend the day with him and we stop as we can. So I haven´t had much time for things like blogging...

Which, speaking of his job, please pray for God to supernaturally provide a better one. This one is very long hours (From about 930am till about 830pm with an hour for lunch...although maybe it will be slightly better when he isn´t fitting all these errands in) and not enough pay. But it´d be next to impossible to find a new one while working this one. SO...

In other news, our house is very cute. I´m very excited about that! It´s brand new, we´re the first renters. And small, but plenty for the 2 of us. And within walking distance of a couple of my best friends here.

They had a shower for me last Saturday. I was very nervous to be the center of attention for so long without Herme to help me. But it was loads of fun (the Mexican culture has a better idea of how to enjoy themselves, I think)! And we were given a nice starter set of things for the house - towels, glasses, iron and board, pans...

Hmm, I´m almost out of time on my account here, so...

I appreciate your prayers as we wind up all the details before the wedding! and for my Spanish to come quickly!

I´ll write again as I´m able - I should have a bit more time when things settle down after the wedding.

The Adventure Begins...

2007-12-10T07:27:00.000-05:00

So, I promised a post about how God used my long engagement for good, but I'm all out of time. Suffice it to say that a year ago, I cried every time my family talked about Christmas presents and whether we should pull names since there are so many of us (I ended up being the one person that exchanged gifts with everyone), and this year I happily watched as they pulled names without including me at all. My point is, I'm not usually good with change, but I think with the long engagement I've had, God has been able to prepare me and walk me through all the emotions little by little.

I leave, as in move to another country, in an hour and a half!

My man has been here since late Thursday night, and in case anyone wasn't sure, I've got an awesome man to become my husband. This was an exhausting, overwhelming weekend for him. But he managed to walk it out quite gracefully, AND consistently put his own feelings aside to help me walk out my good-byes. Which, all things considered, I've handled pretty well. There must be people praying for me! Don't get me wrong, there were tears each time I said good-bye to the next person, but only ever a few, and I never got overwhelmed by sadness or anything.

That's a really short, doesn't do it justice, description of where I'm at and what I'm up to. But I gotta get moving.

One more thing....FB and my family really connected well, I think. Which is awesome for me.

Ok, next time I write, I'll be in Mexico. I have no clue when that will be, but I will be back. Promise.

Late :(

2007-12-06T10:36:00.000-05:00

Remember that 2:30 arrival that I thought would maximize FB's time here?

Yeah.

Well, he missed his 1st flight, apparently. I don't know how or why. Now he won't arrive until 11pm.

Oh well.

At least this time he and I aren't limited in our time together (like when I went down there for a short visit last Christmas and my early afternoon arrival turned into a late-night arrival...)...

It just limits his time meeting my family and what-not.

I'm just hoping he gets some sleep along the way today, cause it's gonna be a long one. And I'm hoping he doesn't starve, since he has no American money to use on his now long Atlanta layover.

Soon. He will be here soon.

Little bit of good packing news

2007-12-05T09:38:00.000-05:00

I'd been weighing all my bags on the scale we have here at my parents' house, stopping several pounds short of the limit since I didn't know how the scale at the airport would compare. I didn't want to cut it real close to the limit only to discover that our scale was off and all my bags were overweight.

So, this morning, early, and in the snow, I trekked out to the airport with one of my heaviest bags and got it weighed. It weighed the exact same amount at the airport as it did at home. That means that every bag I packed so far can hold several more pounds of stuff each. That is a HUGE help in my organizing and packing world!

Well, I'm off to pack some more :P

I think I've mentioned...

2007-12-04T09:28:00.000-05:00

...how I hate packing!

For some reason it always turns my brain to mush. I have to put so much thought into what should go together so that breakables don't break and nothing is overweight and I can find things later...

And now the weight limits imposed by the airlines are really pretty tight. Which is extremely frustrating, because I have lots of stuff I'd like to take with me, and some nice big suitcases that can hold lots of that stuff...but if I fill them, they are overweight and I have to pay major fees :(

UPDATE: Scratch the comments on major fees. Turns out for my flight to Mexico, I'm not allowed to take anything over 50 pounds, period. It is so frustrating to have the space for the things I need to pack, but be limited by weight. Apparently shipping is more important to airlines than passengers luggage.

Like I said, it all turns my brain to mush, so this post is unfortunatly nothing inspired. But please pray for my man, as his boss informed him yesterday that he needs to work double today and tomorrow to make up for his time coming here. Which, when combined with his very early departure time Thursday and the fact that he has never flown, means there is quite the potential for him to be exhausted when he arrives. So pray for productivity, rest, strength, and easy travel.

Coming soon....how such a long engagement was probably God's way of preparing me...

Weeeee!!

2007-11-29T10:33:00.000-05:00

FB will arrive one week from today!!!

We will be married one month from today!!!

These last few days - excitement way out-weighs sadness :)

FAQ

2007-11-27T09:56:00.000-05:00

As suggested by a good friend, I am going to share with you all this morning the most frequently asked questions posed to me in the last several months.

So, are you (getting) excited??
This question bugs me. Are you serious? Of course I'm excited! I'm getting married!! I think this is the kind of question people ask when they don't take the time to actually think of something to talk about.

When are you leaving/when is he coming?
This question, although much more valid than the last one, has definitely gotten old. But only because until just a couple of weeks ago, I had no good answer for this. Sometimes I'd give some vague answer about what we were hoping would happen, other times I just said I had no idea. And although I think I have handled all of our ever-changing plans pretty well (thank you very much), not being able to give a good answer to this question invariably brought on a subtle roll of anxiety in my gut.

Will you work when you get there?
Umm, I was thinking that moving to another country, mastering a foreign language, and getting married would be enough major adjustments for one time. Plus, just about any job is going to require a little more Spanish than I currently have. Of course, considering our current financial status, it may become necessary. Which kind of stresses me out sometimes.

How many days?
This one is asked consistently by a few people who know how much I enjoy counting down to the wedding :) (32 days, in case you didn't notice. and only 9 until he gets here!)

Are you ready?
This one has started popping up more recently. I usually answer that I don't think it is really possible for me to know until it happens. I don't even have anything remotely close in my life to compare this to.

How are your parents with all of this?
Not a bad question, I suppose, except that the answer seems so obvious. How do you think they are doing? They feel like just about any parent would feel (at least, within a healthy family relationship)...they are excited about the marriage to a great guy, excited their daughter is happy, sad that we'll be living so far away.

The extreme repetitiveness of these questions makes me feel a bit like a high school senior (you know, when all you are ever asked is if you "know what you want to do next year/with the rest of your life?"). It's not that some of the questions aren't valid, but that so many times it feels like the person asking didn't give any thought to the conversation, just grabbed onto the easiest, most obvious question that popped into their head. It also makes me feel a bit one dimensional, if that makes sense. I truly appreciate the few who show how much they truly care (even if they do ask one of the FAQs), who you can tell stopped what they were doing or thinking about long enough to really listen and go a little deeper than the surface.

Questions I wished I was asked more often:

Is there anything I can do for you?/Do you need anything?
I don't always have a good answer for this one, but it makes me feel cared for. Luggage and cash are about the only gifts I'm accepting at this point. Help packing can be nice. Prayers are huge. Speaking of which...

How can I pray?
I love this one. There are so few tangible ways anyone can help me, but there are lots of things I'll take prayer for. My answer can vary based on who I am talking to and what other things we've already discussed, but a few of the biggies include:
-FB's job situation. His current salary does not even come close to cutting it. And I'm just talking paying the bills, not anything extra or comfort based.
-My Spanish!
-My transition. This is a huge change, and it's only gonna work by God's grace. Related to this - my emotions. To be able to process them in a healthy way without becoming overwhelmed by them. Also related - building relationships with people even though I'm not yet fluent in their language.
-Honestly, I truly worry sometimes about whether I'll be a good wife. I'm thinking that probably a lot of soon-to-be-married women have this concern. Mine is compounded by all the cultural adjustments (will I be able to make foods he likes/is used to? will homemaking skills I have here easily transfer to a place with different customs and resources? will my Spanish improve quickly enough for me to be able to communicate effectively with him?)

Of course, watch - I'll end up missing being asked all these questions once I'm surrounded by non-English speakers and missing everyone here :P

What to say?

2007-11-21T13:17:00.000-05:00

I couldn't help but notice (you may have as well) that I have posted significantly less this month than the last couple of months. I got to wondering why that was, since I have at least as much time now for it as I have had. The conclusion I reached is that my focus is so narrow right now, I feel like I'll only be repeating myself. The cycle of emotions I posted a few days ago pretty much sums up where I am at lately.

But a couple of new things I can share...

I didn't expect to be here still for Thanksgiving. I'm truly looking forward to fully enjoying tomorrow. All of my siblings and their spouses and/or children will be there (the first time since the end of July). We'll be at my aunt's (my mom's younger sister) like we have been every year about as long as I remember. My aunt and uncle will make way too much food, we'll end up laughing hysterically with my grandmother over next to nothing...the same things that happen every year and are that much more special because of it. An extra special element this year - I am bringing my wedding dress (as well as all the extras like the veil and jewelry) to try on for my grandmother. Since the trip to Mexico would much too much for her at almost-95, I'm looking forward to being able to at least share this much of the wedding experience with her.

I've already chatted with FB about creating our own Thanksgiving tradition in Mexico. We'd have to do it on a Saturday so that people would have the time to join us. But I'm looking forward to an opportunity to share some of my traditions and memories with friends and family there.

-------------------------------
Just in case anyone lost track, my fiance will be here 2 weeks from tomorrow...
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Something I just recently found out about and am looking forward to quite a bit - apparently my future sisters-in-law and future landlady (also a friend) are planning a bridal shower for me the first Saturday after I arrive in Saltillo! I'm really excited to be able to see friends and celebrate with them! And since they are holding it so early after my arrival, I'll quickly have a better handle on what we'll need to purchase.

Other than that, the only real news is that plans are coming together for the few days that FB will be here. I've sent out email invites to an Open House for that Saturday, my old coworkers are planning a short shower type party for us, I'm going to talk to grandma tomorrow about a visit with her that Friday morning, and still need to talk to my grandfather about a visit with him. I'm the only one able to meet him when he arrives, as most people will be at work or school, but that will give him a little bit to reorient himself after a long day.

Well, Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

Cyclical emotions

2007-11-16T12:41:00.000-05:00

Ummm... do you realize that my man will be here in 20 days??! That's right - less than 3 weeks from now. Do you also realize that only a few short days after he arrives, we'll leave together - as in, I will make a permanent move to another country??!

This knowledge sends me through the following cycle of emotions:

1) I'm so excited I want to jump up and down because there are only 20 short days until I can see the love of my life!! And where every other time I've seen him, I've had to leave him less than 2 weeks later - this time I will be seeing him every day indefinitely!!

2) I become almost paralyzed at the thought of packing for a move to another country. I have moved many times in my life, including 9 moves in the last 11 years (is that not ridiculous??). But to move to another country? One far enough away that I am flying, not driving - meaning anything and everything I want to bring with me needs to fit into a suitcase. Oh, and each suitcase has to fit the ever lowering weight limit unless I want to pay exorbitant fees - meaning I have to think very carefully about which items I pack together in each suitcase.

3) Ok, quick disclaimer on this one: I have never been more sure of something in my life. I absolutely know that this move is exactly what I want to and should do. BUT - I am slightly in shock that in a little more than 3 weeks, I am going to move to another country. I am, as in, me - the girl who has lived within a 5 mile radius her whole life (minus one or 2 years that were less than 15 miles out).

4) A deep sadness about all the people who I love and care about who will be here while I am there, and how very much I will miss them.

5) A bit of disbelief, in a fairy-tale, very happy kind of way, that I am actually getting married - to a man that I love and respect very, very much. And just to put the icing on the cake, so to speak, I am beginning to feel like I will truly look like a princess on my wedding day. (Have I mentioned how much I like my dress? And jewelry? And how I now have the perfect make-up? Oh, I have? Ok, good.)

On a related note, a friend recently mentioned how she will soon be celebrating her 9th anniversary. There have been many times that I have reassured myself that I have not been single all that long, that I am still relatively young, etc. And then a friend mentions she's been married almost 9 years (and she was a senior in college when she married - an adult, by most everyone's standards), and I realize that I actually have been a single adult woman for quite a while. I've kinda gotten used to it, in fact, and have learned to enjoy many aspects of it (not that I ever enjoyed it enough to want to stay single!). I'm thinking married life might be a bit of an adjustment.

Anyone else tired yet? Because I am. This transition stuff is exhausting.

Details!!

2007-11-13T15:25:00.000-05:00

I've mostly avoided having to figure out and put together all the wedding details thus far. Mostly because I'm so far away that I can't be the one actually figuring things out, and partly because we've had a pretty long engagement so it was easy to put things off. But not anymore. We're down to 6 1/2 weeks until the wedding (oh my gosh! that is soooo soon!!) So, lots of final details need to be dealt with. And I've actually made some very good progress in recent days.

Over the weekend, former roommates helped me finish off finding my wedding day jewelry. We had a great time hanging out, including dinner (with dessert!) beforehand. And I do believe the jewelry is perfect! :)

Yesterday I had a make-up appointment with a woman from church that sells Mary-K. I realized recently that seeing as how I will be in a very small minority once I move to Saltillo, it may be difficult to find my colors and/or someone who could help me choose the right look for the wedding day. Thanks to the fact that she was running a 1/2 off sale, I now have lots of great make-up for not so much money. And since I'm not that great with make-up, the one on one consult was very helpful.

You may remember these ring ideas from about a month ago. Well, FB definitely liked this one. So a few weeks ago, my mom and I went out ring shopping...and couldn't find anything quite like it. I was somewhat discouraged. But then we went again last Thursday. Not only did we find more than one store where we could get exactly what I was looking for, one of those stores has a sale running - if you buy a matching set, you pay for the man's and the woman's is free! Thankfully, it appears that ring sizes are standard between here and Mexico, so now that I have FB's ring size, I can get those ordered tonight or tomorrow. From what I was told, the rings should be in before I leave.

I've been making my head spin today while researching my options on how to transfer my money from here to there. (I haven't come up with a bank yet that has branches in both places, so it looks like I need to close my account here and get all of my money there somehow...)

I'm sure there's more that I'm not thinking of in the moment, but I don't want to bore you all to tears, so I won't try too hard to think of what I'm forgetting. ;)

They're booked!!

2007-11-09T11:59:00.000-05:00

I booked the flights this morning!

They aren't perfect - FB's ticket ended up a bit more expensive than I expected, and we arrive back in Mexico kind of late - but he'll arrive here at 2:30 in the afternoon, which maximizes his time here. We don't leave till 11:00 am that Monday. And there's only one layover in each direction. And unless there's some major issue, he should have enough time to get through customs and immigration on the way up here.

So, I really am leaving. Funny how much more things sink in when there's an actual date and flight. I've known for over a year that this was coming, but while all the dates were fuzzy, it was easy to not really consider what all it meant. Hmmm. That isn't exactly what I'm trying to say, but it is the best I can do to put it into words for the moment.

I've been crying a lot ever since the date to leave was set. Not long bouts of sobbing or anything. Just moments where someone comes to mind and I realize how much I'll miss them and how much it hurts to leave them. Maybe it's the thought of a nephew or niece, or just before I call a good friend, or after calling my mom about the hundredth thing that day. And I'll lose it (sometimes completely, sometimes just a few tears) for a minute or 2. Times that by several times a day. It's kind of exhausting.

On the other hand, I'm so excited about seeing FB that I can hardly stand it! I keep thinking about the really great part where I don't have to say good-bye to him for a long time to come. I'll be with him everyday. And I'm looking forward to the time I'll be spending with his family before the wedding (I'll definitely be staying with his mom, sister, and nieces for the few weeks between my arrival and the wedding, and he and his brother will go live in the house we're going to rent). I can't wait to see all my friends in Saltillo. I'm already hoping I get to go to home group the night after I arrive so I can see some of them.

I'm working hard at making sure I turn to the Lord with all my ups and downs. I don't know why it is that it is so easy to avoid the Lord exactly at the times you most need Him. So, when I find myself in tears or anticipating the excitement of being with my man, I am really trying to stop and talk to the Lord about it for a moment. Ask Him for help, or thank Him for the ways I'm blessed, or just share what I'm feeling.

All in all, this is quite the roller coaster ride. Please pray I don't completely exhaust myself as I work through all the emotions. Please pray I do indeed work through all the emotions. Please pray for supernatural organizational and packing abilities. Please pray for the right priorities for FB's time here.
Thanks.

Updates

2007-11-08T12:15:00.000-05:00

For those of you who like a little closure, I thought I should post a couple of updates.

As you may remember, I've been sick for 4 solid weeks now. A week ago, I finally broke down and went to the Dr sans insurance and got an antibiotic. I had high hopes of remembering what normal feels like within a few days.

Well, as it turns out, the antibiotic does not appear to have done a thing for me. Took the last one last night. I'm still congested. Still coughing occasionally. I bought a different expectorant/decongestant yesterday (this time I had my ID ready). Between that and an online tip, I've at least managed to get my ear to start unplugging this morning. My voice isn't echoing so much inside my head, and I feel only slightly deaf instead of half deaf. But I hate to pay for another Dr visit.

On a more positive note, my weekend trip was simply wonderful. I couldn't believe all the colorful leaves we got to enjoy, courtesy of a mild fall. Made the drive just beautiful. I had great company for the drive as well. You gotta love the friend you can talk to for 6 1/2 hours straight, 2x! And we had a fun, low-key visit with our friends, enjoying their new house and 2 little ones. It always makes me so happy to see how happy this particular friend is. She's got the best of husbands and is a great stay-at-home mom.
Of course, even though it had occurred to me ahead of time, I managed to forget, and so was caught off guard by how emotional and hard it was to say good-bye. The first round of many, I'm afraid. You gotta love the friend who handles it just right when you get in the car bawling.

Well, I guess I'll get back to flight watching. I'm going a bit crazy trying to book FB's round-trip ticket and my one-way ticket. I usually just take one of the cheapest flights, no matter how obnoxious the schedule. But I'm trying to make the most of the little time he'll have here, make sure he has a long enough lay-over to navigate customs and immigration for his first time, give me the opportunity to say good-bye the day we leave (i.e. not leave at the crack of dawn if I don't have to), not get back at midnight since he'll have to work the next day, and make my one-way ticket match his return flight. How's that for craziness?!

But he'll be here 4 weeks from today!!

He's coming!!! (and I'm going...)

2007-11-05T10:25:00.000-05:00

FB's boss is letting him have a few more days! He is coming up for a quick visit before the wedding after all!! And then we'll leave together.

Thursday, December 6th, he'll arrive here in Rochester (hopefully I can get him a flight early enough to arrive here late afternoon or early evening). Then we'll leave together on Monday, December 10th.

That means I will see him in 31 days, and I will leave for Mexico in 35 days.

The best part about this news for me (ok, one of the best parts) is knowing when I'll see my love again :)

One of the things I am happiest about in this is that something finally went right for my man. He's been pretty down and frustrated what with his job situation not being the best, and how tight money is, and not knowing if he'd even be able to come and present himself to my family before the wedding. So I am so happy for him that this worked out. Plus, it means his boss must like him at least a little bit. Also a good feeling for him.

For me, I am glad that he will see a bit of my life here before I leave. That's huge. It will be a small slice in so short a time, and I know he'll have more opportunities in the future, but it is easier for me to leave knowing he'll understand a bit of what I am leaving.

So, here we go, this is the real deal. There is an actual visit date for him, and an actual departure date for me. Wow.

Meds

2007-11-01T14:36:00.000-04:00

Well, I finally broke down and did it. I went to a Dr even though I have no medical insurance or coverage at all. I haven't been super-sick, and I kept hoping I'd just get better eventually. I thought it was just a cold. But it has now been 3 1/2 weeks and I'm not getting better. I'm starting to forget what normal feels like...

For some reason, every time I had to explain today that I don't have insurance (over the phone making the appointment, explaining to the person examining me why I waited so long to get checked out and how I hoped for cheap meds, talking to the billing person about what they were going to charge me...), I felt like I was going to cry. I'm hoping that's just the PMS...?

Anyways, I now have a script for an antibiotic that should cover any infection in my chest and/or sinuses, and should not cost me an arm and a leg. The appointment, however, was not cheap. Oh well, as my dad pointed out, paying all this is still cheaper than it would have been to have paid for some type of insurance for these few months.

So, hopefully, within a day or 2, this stuff will do it's think and I'll start remembering what normal is.

Fall photos

2007-10-31T12:35:00.000-04:00

Ok, I'm still not sure I know how to work with pictures on Blogger, but here's my attempt to share my sunny and rainy day fall shots with you. I have to give fair warning here - I am not that great of a photographer. So these aren't anything to write home about, but they are my attempt at capturing some of the colors I've seen recently.

The first one is one of my favorites. It was taken while looking straight up through several trees at the sky. I just like all the bright colors, especially the bright blue sky. Obviously, it was taken on the sunny day :)

Now, the rest of these I am posting in pairs, so you can see the contrast more easily. And I think it will be pretty self explanatory which pictures are from which day. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

Reasons to smile :)

2007-10-30T12:09:00.000-04:00

A beautiful, and I mean beautiful, drive on Saturday. The trees had to be close to peak, and we had just the right mix of rain and sun to appreciate the beauty of both!

Grape pie....yummm! And grape bread! And strawberry-rhubarb pie!

Forks and napkins for the taking so you can sample your grape pie as soon as you buy it!

4 kids (the children of a good friend) who are always happy to see me and give me lots of hugs (even if they do sometimes drive me crazy)!

Officially less than 2 months until my wedding!!!

Being asked at the last minute to translate the sermon for a Hispanic women - and doing a decent job of it!

Nieces and nephews! (and the special moments I got to share with them this weekend - like when my 2 yr old niece laid herself down in my arms when sleepy; or when my 4 yr old nephew explained that his new baby sister smiles when he kisses her, so whenever someone wants to see her smile, he kisses her; or when my 2 yr old nephew recited some of the lines with me when I read to him from his favorite books....)

Siblings teasing each other!

'Talking' to my man 5 times in an 8 day period! (with camera, and little to no internet problems!)

Realizing Monday morning that in paying attention to the heavier than usual traffic, I had failed to pay attention to where I was - and had driven right past my exit!

Checking in...

2007-10-26T12:54:00.000-04:00

So, I do have some good pictures contrasting raining and sunny fall colors - I just haven't had a chance to download them to the computer yet. But they are coming :)

I'm excited because this weekend I'm get to enjoy what has become one of my favorite fall traditions...driving with a friend down the back roads to the Naples end of Canandaigua Lake to buy a grape pie. The views are fantastic, especially if I time it right to catch the colors (which I think we've managed to do). And grape pie is one of those unusual but very yummy seasonal treats. Being able to do this is one of the perks of not leaving as early as I'd expected for Mexico.

Another perk of still being here, that I am also very excited about, is that I get to go visit one of my oldest friends next weekend :) I've known her since Kindergarten, love the man she married (he brings out all her best sides), and am looking forward to meeting the newest addition to their family. To top it all off, another good friend of many years to going with me! This is not the CA visit I had hoped for , but I am still grateful for the opportunity I wasn't sure I'd have.

In other news, good friends in Mexico (the Pastor and his wife) are expecting a baby! Very fun. They currently have 2 boys, who will be 10 and 12 by the time the baby comes :)

Rainy fall day

2007-10-23T12:29:00.000-04:00

There is just something about a rainy fall day that is irresistible. I'm not big on rainy days in general. I mean, I'm not anti, but I'm not one of those people that just loves them either. But in the fall....
The colors are just amazing, deep, contrasted.

Yesterday was one of those beautiful, sunny, warm, blue sky (deep blue, like you only see in the fall) kid of days. Just gorgeous.
Today it has rained hard and steady all day. And it is at least as gorgeous as yesterday was.

I shot a few pictures yesterday. If I can figure out how to do it again today without getting soaked, maybe I'll post a couple for comparison.

For those interested in such things

2007-10-23T10:11:00.000-04:00

Here's a link to a website for the place where we are having our reception. Can I just say, by choosing this particular place we just kicked the wedding up several notches...

Fair warning - the site is all in Spanish, so you may just have to blindly click around to find the pictures.

Villa Ferre

For prayer...

2007-10-22T09:53:00.001-04:00

After looking at what an actual flight schedule would look like together, and how little time he'd actually have up here, FB has decided to try talking to his boss one more time and see if he might have mercy on him. Specifically, we're hoping he could have Thursday - Monday, which we're thinking is the minimum amount of time to make the trip worthwhile.

So, we'd appreciate prayers that either:
a) his boss realizes the need and is agreeable, or
b) we'd have peace (especially FB, because he's really frustrated not to be able to follow through on his planned, pre-wedding visit) about the timing of a trip here
and finally
c) for when I should head down if he isn't going to be able to make it.

Thanks!

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

2007-10-18T10:05:00.000-04:00

Ok, so really this post only contains something borrowed and something new, but as a soon to be bride, the title just seemed appropriate.

Here's the borrowed part:
On the way home, I asked The Mom, what with her closeness to God and all, why she didn't listen to him when he told us not to go. She replied that every good Catholic knows you should never listen when God speaks. "No good comes from it. It's either sacrifice your son, or build an ark, or wander the desert, or you're pregnant with my baby and good luck with that. Trust me, this camping trip was way better than any of those things."

I just found that too funny, and had to share. You can read the whole post here.

Plus, it seemed to fit with the thoughts I have left over from a phone conversation last night with a good friend. (This would be the 'new' part - as in my new and recent thoughts on things...)

You see, at first glance, the above description of what happens when God speaks to you would appear accurate. And in reality, it is often what it feels like to walk it out. Like God is asking something ridiculous of you, something way too hard, with no clear happy ending in sight. As my friend said last night, "God doesn't answer why. The question is what for?" But we usually want to know why, and sometimes despair when that question isn't answered.

But then you look deeper, closer. You ask the right question. And all those stories mentioned above get a lot bigger, with a lot more purpose. Miraculous even. So very worth it.

This season of my life has some definite hard parts. And although I've told you about some of them here, there are actually very few people that know all the things that have been conspiring together to make this harder than I would have ever guessed. There have been many, many changes to our best laid plans. Those who know me well know that dealing with change has not traditionally been a strong suit of mine.

Yet, I have had a deep sense of peace walking this out. In the midst of everything, nothing has shaken my belief that I am exactly where God wants me, doing exactly what He wants me to do. And, of course, I've had the encouragement of His pep talks and gifts in this final stretch.

I've had several people comment to me about how well I've rolled with the changes lately. That stands as one of my most convincing proofs that I'm exactly where I should be, because there is no way I would take all this so well unless God was walking me through it and giving me His peace and confidence.

I guess I say all of that to say - as funny as I find that quote I started with, I'd rather listen even when it's hard. And I'm looking forward to seeing the answer to 'what for?'.

Good news and....huh?

2007-10-16T14:01:00.000-04:00

So, the good news...
FB can definitely have the time off needed to go on our honeymoon. :)

And the...huh?
His boss talked to him on Saturday, and said he could have some time off to come up here before the wedding. Sounds great, right? Oh wait, how many days can he have for that (2,000+ mile) trip? Saturday and Sunday.

HUH??

I mean, yes, FB does work about a 1/2 day most Saturdays. But honestly, what was the point in telling him he could have time to come here if it's only a 1/2 day off from work? Even if he could leave several hours early on Friday or get back several hours late on Monday, he'd be here in Rochester for a grand total of.....(drum roll please!)... 38 hours! And that includes time spent getting in and out of the airport, sleeping, etc.

At least this probably means we'll get my departure date hammered out before Thanksgiving (since his boss hasn't waited until late November for this conversation).

Pre-Wedding Advice

2007-10-15T14:08:00.000-04:00

So, I went around all weekend on retreat and asked married women (and widows) this question:

What do I need to know before I get married? What do you wish you had known, or what have you learned?

Here's some of my favorite answers (covering the spectrum of spiritual to funny):

* Put God first, then your husband, then your kids. It's too easy to let the kids rise to the top.
(I noticed on this one that I don't even make the list!)

* Communicate clearly about everything, from the beginning. Don't let stuff build up.

* No matter how poor you are, or how busy you are - go on dates!

* "Don't expect him to be just like Jesus. I thought at first he would be, because he loved me."

* Overlook the little annoyances. Chances are, he's clueless, not intentional.

* When you want God to change things in your husband - He'll probably change you!

* "I wish someone would have warned me - he poked me in the middle of the night, woke me up. And I was like, really? Now? I was sound asleep!"

* Laugh! Have a sense of humor!

* "Keep your mouth shut! and that's from someone who didn't :)"

* Know the difference between talking and communicating.

* There may be a day when you wake up and think, "Who are you? What am I doing here?" But push through it, and you'll come out with a strengthened marriage.

Anyone have anything else to add?? I'd love to hear from you!

A really good weekend

2007-10-15T09:44:00.000-04:00

Well, for all those waiting with great anticipation...overall, it was a really good weekend. :)
(Warning - this is a little long)

I was able to truly enjoy everyone's company and have some great conversations with people at meals and during down times. There were times enjoying those I already am close to, and times getting to know others better. (I'm glad I am able to keep investing in new and old relationships even knowing that I'm leaving soon.) I had fun asking people what advice they had for me as I prepare for marriage, something they wished they had known or had since learned. (I'll do a post later with some of my favorite answers.) The times of worship were really sweet, and I was much less distracted than I usually find myself at church. And God sent me specific words 3 different times.

I'm starting to have some real anticipation for what God wants to do with me in Saltillo (Mexico). To receive so many clear words from Him in such a short time both encourages me and makes me curious. Here's some of the highlights:

From the woman who came with the speaker:
"God pointed you out to me last night and told me that you are pregnant spiritually. You will birth this 'baby' when you arrive in Mexico - this is a fresh anointing, a new ministry, to bring salvation and freedom to those youth and adults you will minister to. Even though you will be going as a 'gringo', it will be as though you are a fresh rain and they will absorb from you as if they were a dry sponge."

From one of the older woman from my church:
"You've waited a long time for a husband - but it was because you needed the experiences you've had to prepare you for how He wants to use you. You will stand out, be different in how you look, how you sound - but that will draw people to you and you will be able to minister to them."

From a woman I was once a flower girl for:
(This one was more a prayer that sometimes morphed into something God was saying)
"I pray that God would birth new pathways in your brain to be able to learn the Spanish quickly. I feel God is going to miraculously cause you to be able to learn the language quickly. And you are nervous, hurting to leave so many here, because you are afraid your limited Spanish will make it difficult for you to form close relationships there - but God will do it. You are feeling a tearing in leaving this place, but I pray God would sear your heart in the wounded places and heal the pain."

These words, combined with some of the teaching from the speaker, have me rethinking and wondering about the prophesy I was given a couple weeks ago. For example, I understandably took the part about delays to refer to all the changing plans this year. But I'm seeing now how it could be referring to a much bigger picture than that. I had hopes that the verbal gift meant I'd quickly learn the language. I'm still believing for divine help with that, especially after the prayer above. But the speaker this weekend had a way of categorizing spiritual gifts (verbal gifts, power gifts, etc), that combined with the word given me about a new ministry, has me thinking about other interpretations of that. Finally, OTRgirl had asked me if I thought the missionary part could simply refer to how God wanted to use me while living my married life in Saltillo. At the time, that did not strike a chord with me, but I also didn't have a clue where it might be that God would send me. I'm wondering now, though, if that might be it after all.

Finally, I know you are all wondering if I cried all weekend ;)
I actually hardly did at all. It wasn't until testimony time on Sunday that I started to lose it, especially when the speaker had our former (deceased) pastor's daughters pray for his heart and anointing to be on the new/current pastor's wife. What really did me in, though, was knowing that I wanted and needed to somehow express to these women who are like family my love and appreciation for them. I kept holding back, knowing that if I went up front to share, I'd bawl (happens every time!). Finally, I went up, made a joke about how I always cry (a few chuckles), started sobbing (lots of chuckles), and said, "So I'm not even going to try and say anything, except that I hope by coming up here, you know my heart." Quite a few ladies came and gave me hugs before the morning was over and assured me they did indeed. Which of course prompted more tears on my part. But it felt refreshing, healing, full of love.

All in all, a great 'last' retreat.

Uh-oh

2007-10-12T13:41:00.000-04:00

(This post will make more sense if you've already read the previous post.)

This is not a good sign...

I've been fighting a cold the last few days, so I thought I'd run over to the drug store on my lunch break to buy some cold medicine. You know how awful it is to be in the middle of a quiet (read: retreat) service, and then have to keep blowing your nose or coughing? Even though I might be able to make do, I thought I'd be kind to everyone else.

I'm kind of picky about meds, since I'm sensitive to side effects, so I had a particular kind I wanted. You have to ask for it at the pharmacy counter. So I did. And then they asked for photo ID. Well, my wallet fell out of my bag at home (I discovered just as I headed for the store), so I didn't have any. They said it is federal law, and they can't sell it to me without ID.

At which point I started tearing up. By the time I made it out to the car, I was actually crying. Because I couldn't buy some cold medicine.

I'm a little worried about my emotional state now. I can't even blame hormones - that was last week!

Emotional Ambush?

2007-10-12T11:55:00.000-04:00

This weekend is the women's retreat for my church. This year will be my 12th. I started going my freshman year of college.

I've always really enjoyed going, even though there really aren't any other girls my age. It is always a good time of reconnecting with some women I haven't talked to lately and building relationships with some I don't know as well. Sort of like a good family reunion. Of course, there's the God part too, but that's not so much the point of my reflections for this post...

My point is this - last year, I had an emotional ambush when I got there. I knew I was engaged and would be moving away, but that was not general knowledge yet (we didn't announce it until New Years). I knew it could very well be my last retreat for a while, but no one else really knew that. And so, every time there was a chance to just hang out and chat and have fun, I ended up 'ambushed' by sadness, tears, pain at the idea of leaving so many well-loved, longtime friends. I felt like I should be living it up, making the most of it - but all I wanted to do was hide and cry.

Since things have worked out the way they have this fall, and I haven't left yet, it turns out I get to go again this year. And suddenly, a couple of days ago, I remembered last year's emotional ambush. Now I'm wondering - what will I feel and go through this year? Everyone knows where I am at this time. I'm hoping that helps. Last year, the idea of leaving and the associated grieving process was still pretty new to me. This year I've worked through some of that. But I'm afraid I'm one of those people that has a better read on everyone else than I do myself most of the time. So I really don't know what this weekend will look like.

I want to enjoy it. I want to savor each conversation. I want to ask questions of the women who are older than me, and therefore have more experience than me in at least some areas, like, "what do you wish you had known before you got married?" so I can glean every last possible bit of wisdom from these Godly ladies. But I am a little nervous that I'll struggle like I did last year...

We'll see. I'll let you know how it goes...

To be a bride

2007-10-10T11:36:00.000-04:00

After a long time of waiting (first, years of waiting for the man God had for me; second, months of waiting to marry that man once 'found'), the reality of the wedding day is beginning to sink in. It is, you may have noticed, only 80 days away...

And, goodness, is it exciting!

I went a couple of days ago for a fitting. Have I mentioned here how very, very beautiful my wedding dress is?!?! And it fits me perfectly. Perfectly. The only alterations being done are the hem and the bustle, which always have to be done. Standing there in that dress, wearing the headpiece and the shoes and all....it gave me a rush for at least the next couple of hours :)

I tried on an awful lot of dresses before I found this one. I knew a few people that found their dress pretty early on - some chose the 2nd or 3rd dress they saw. I tried on over 30 dresses. Maybe even over 40 dresses. Many were very pretty, and since I happen to be the size that is usually in stock, many were very pretty on me. I wondered a few times if I would really find one that would be the one.

Well, I most definitely did!! :)

I've been looking at wedding rings the last couple of days. What a sense of permanence they have. Of belonging. Of commitment.

Up until now, I hadn't given much thought to what kind of ring I wanted. I figured FB and I would go shopping together and settle on something together. But since we aren't going to have much time together before the wedding, I've started to look and get an idea of what I like.

I think I want a very simple ring. I know there are some neat, and sometimes very meaningful, designs out there. But I keep coming back to the plain, gold rings. I'm not interested in 2-tone, diamonds, patterns. The most I think I'll consider is possibly a bit of edging (like this or this) or something just slightly different like this.
Sometime soon I'm going shopping with one of my closest friends for my wedding day jewelry. At the moment, I don't feel like I have the slightest clue what I want. But I'm hopeful that I will know when I see it - just like the dress and headpiece.

At times, I feel quite a bit of pressure - these are big decisions, for a very important day. But mostly - this is just fun! :)

The Miracles

2007-10-08T13:24:00.000-04:00

At inkling's request (especially since I think she'll really appreciate these), let me explain the recent miracles...

The first one was indirectly for my benefit. I think all my readers know that my wedding is actually going to be in Mexico. This was the best choice for a variety of reasons, but it does severly limit the number of people from my side who can attend the wedding. All of my immediate family (parents, siblings, and siblings spouses and children) will be there, and just a few good friends. Mostly, I'm ok with this, but you know...

There is one couple in particular that I am very close to - I'll call them the Faithfuls. The Faithfuls have been to Mexico several times themselves, both with the church missions teams, and once for a personal visit with their 4 kids. They are about 10 years older than me, but through different ministries we've served in together and the fact that Mrs Faithful and I helped each other lose a bunch of weight a few years ago, we've become very close. They know FB personally and are so excited that we are getting married. Ever since I told them I was engaged, they have planned on coming to the wedding, and trusted that God would miraculously provide the money for them to do so. You see, their only income is from Mr Faithful working for our church. All year, I've trusted that this would work out fine....until the last couple of weeks. The wedding is getting close; they needed to be making plans. But they still didn't have the money.

Until Thursday, that is. When they received a check from friends that was expressly for the purpose of airfare to my wedding!
(Post script on that - they've since had a family member offer to come stay with all 4 kids for the whole time they are gone!)

I was so excited. You see, since so few people can come to my wedding, the few who can are really important to me. And the Faithfuls have been there for me through this whole process, and know and love FB themselves.

When Mrs Faithful and I talked on Friday, still so excited about it all, she told me how one advantage to not having much income is that you have a lot more opportunities to see God miraculously or creatively provide. She was encouraging me because she knows how little money FB and I currently have, and are likely to have in the coming months. Just last Monday, FB told me that he had been paid even less than we expected.

This conversation turned out to be the precursor to miracle number 2.

A few weeks ago, I was told I needed a major car repair. A repair that cost near $900 (and would have basically wiped me out at the time). That day I was crying at my desk too, but from stress and anxiety. Money is tight enough for the two of us - this was too much.

A couple of calls later, I decided to take it to a mechanic near church, who thought he could do the repair for about half that price since he happened to have the part on hand. I gratefully thought that was God's provision.

After looking at it himself, he decided the part in question just needed a good cleaning, not replacing. He said the repair (which included some other tune-up type stuff) would now come to about $200, and I could take my time getting him the payment. I very gratefully thought that was God's provision.

Now jump ahead to Friday afternoon (just after that conversation about God's provision with Mrs Faithful). I called to find out the exact amount I owed. And was told I owed nothing at all. "Consider it a wedding gift." Wow. From almost $1,000 to nothing at all. God is so good.